I read And Then There Were None when I was in seventh grade. It was intriguing, thrilling, scary. The ending blew my mind and made me obsessed with murder mysteries for life. I’ve been chasing the high I got from that first mystery ever since.

Helloooo, ladies.

My FanDuel and DraftKings prop bets about this paid off! You can be a winner too with promo code CORRUPT!

I give all Target employees permission to avoid eye contact with me. Also to stay well more than 10 feet from me.

When your wife makes a ton of Christmas cookies every year and sees a local grocery chain having a one-day sale on butter w/a purchase limit, you get up early and double hit as many locations as you can. 7 locations and 28 pounds of butter later, we are finally back home and set for the holidays.

Am not lying when I say Game Night is my favorite comedy movie in years. “How can that be profitable for Frito Lay?” is something I quote on a regular basis.

Might need to break with my “wait until all the season’s episodes are out” watch policy for Pluribus. One of my favorite showrunners creating a high concept show that’s getting great reviews but no one is REALLY describing what it’s about? Sounds like something I don’t want to get spoiled on.

I spent 30 seconds looking for my phone while holding it in my hand and yeah, it’s time to call it a week.

If I was really rich, I would not complain about mayors refusing to meet with me; I would just buy a lot of Lego sets and spend extended periods in Tokyo, Italy, and France

My wife and her sisters playing this game and screaming at each other would be an entertaining series in its own right.

When compared to today's shitstorm, it's tempting to look back at Bush/Cheney and think "it wasn't THAT bad"... but it really was. Lying us into the most consequential conflict in our lifetime and starting an unwinnable "war on terror" is not something I'll ever forget. Good riddance.

TCM has a Robert Redford marathon all day today, so that’ll help fill the baseball void. Top quality film lineup, but no Sneakers, which is a miss.

Hell of a post season. Am gonna miss baseball something fierce this winter.

This World Series is the hottest club in New York. It has *everything*

Strap in for another nine innings!

Ohtani being walked in his upcoming at bat is a pretty safe bet. If the Blue Jays aren’t insane, that is.

Man Wouldn't Have Worn Costume To Work If He'd Known He Was Getting Laid Off

After flying Delta this morning, it feels like I’ve time traveled back to the 90’s on this American flight.

Kansas City airport: pretty blah place, not much variety for eating, but the gender neutral bathrooms have A+ private stalls. So, mixed bag overall.

My Uber driver has an 80’s station playing in the car. That’s how you get a good tip.

Super excited to begin my work day trip to Kansas City that gets me back home at midnight.

Tapping out. 15 innings at almost 1am is my limit for two teams I don’t even particularly care for. I love baseball. But I love being able to function tomorrow juuuust a little bit more.

Playing a Will Smith song to tease the upcoming at bat of Will Smith is the kind of on-the-nose thinking I’ve come to expect from Fox.

i should be able to click a button at the beginning of a sports season that says “i’m normal” and i don’t get served any ads for crypto or gambling

Doing my bit to fuck with AI

Updating my LEGO White House

We could all learn a lesson from WarGames.

you don't understand. as someone who isn't inherently good at art, stealing paintings from the museum is the *only* way i'm able to express myself creatively. i wouldn't be able to paint beautiful portraits. but by breaking into a museum and stealing the paintings, now i am

I’ll say upfront that I don’t care at all for biopics, especially musician based ones, but I saw the trailer for the upcoming Springsteen movie and laughed out loud at how bad it was to me. It is SO paint-by-the-biopic-numbers that you could have told me it was a parody and I’d have believed you.

One of the most influential artists in the history of Hollywood has passed. Thanks for everything, Drew Struzan. www.instagram.com/p/DPy0ZUEEVnt/

Today, we as a country come together to celebrate everyone's favorite episode of The Sopranos.

Diane Keaton was wonderful and will be missed.

This is the poorest Gerald McRaney cosplay I’ve ever seen.

Trump’s team is going to create their own version of the Nobel Peace Prize (why let some foreigners decide these things?!) and award it to him in a White House ceremony that all the networks will carry live.

I have as much chance to win the Nobel Prize for Peace tomorrow as Trump does, but I’m not waiting by my phone and readying a nasty tirade if I don’t get it.

What the ever loving fuck is he babbling about?

glad to be born at a time when i got to see what life was like before the internet and will be dead before AI completely destroys humanity

*chef’s kiss*

quick while the government is shut down let’s all switch to metric

Luke putting R2 in an enormous bag of rice on Dagobah.

Really interesting article about a problem our leaders (and probably ourselves) are unequipped and unwilling to tackle. Data is how a problem is identified. But policy and action is how it’s solved.

Study Finds Regular Journaling Can Help Provide Clues About Mysterious Disappearance https://theonion.com/study-finds-regular-journaling-can-help-provide-clues-about-mysterious-disappearance/

Luckily, Oswald wrote "Magic" on one of the bullets.

Too late, Batman. Once this Tylenol floods the city's water supply, my wiki won't run out of editors ever again

The good news is that if the rapture happens late enough you may still have time to binge all three seasons of The Leftovers before it happens

The people who *make this tech* can't get it to work in a simple demo, and their magical thinking about it has convinced them that they didn't need to do the most basic level of preparation for their demonstration. So it is, in fact, an excellent demonstration of what genAI will do for society.