the chicago cubs are what we in the business refer to as "mega frauds"

my mother has a revenge based theory of sports. to her the jays won by too much today and it puts us in danger for the next game because the yankees will "want revenge"

finally got around to watching mad max fury road. great movie!

"star wars? nope. yoda? yup" says more in 5 words than most people can do in 500. e40 kicks ass

obviously the parents at the end of spirited away werent gonna remember anything but it wouldve been really funny if they were like "chihiro that was so fucked up how we got turned into pigs"

sarah HATES it when i imply that i think chase from house is a vampire. i love trolling my wife

its so funny when the guys doing my oil change turn on my car and get samba jumpscared, which i know is happening because suddenly i am no longer getting music in my headphones

its so embarrassing when you see someone wearing a hat or a sweater from a university or college and then it turns out they actually went there

listening to new sabrina carpenter. nobody can say i dont give second chances

my wife is going to get her G1 drivers license tomorrow can i get a #GoodLuckSarah in the replies

watched k-pop demon hunters because its the hot movie everyone is watching these days. gamelords verdict: not great, 2/5 stars

im starting to become like one of those obnoxious disco haters from the 70s but about modern country music

Ken Griffey Jr. should be in Smash

it really is unbelievable and quite upsetting how often i am forced to listen to country music

pikmin 2 when beady long legs comes down. freaked the fuck outta me

torontonian cuisine is spreading to more and more cities

METRIC ASTROLOGY - EARTH

(darth vader voice) im gonna fucking kill you

Been fixated on the on-deck areas this year, and can report that 1. most on-deck circles have this freaky bat but 2. Literally no hitter has ever swung it.

watched this movie Identikit. i dont know that i totally understood the movie but it was very interesting. #GamelordsVerdict

It's simple, we turn off the Internet.

watching rushmore. bill murray hates his chud sons

its peak...

new cinephile technique "method watching" when you watch a movie and then act and talk like the main character around your girlfriend for 2 months

nothing pisses me off like when someone tells you their favourite dinosaur and its something that isnt a dinosaur. like get a fucking clue buddy

i was the one who started the trend of calling a pancake with syrup and strawberries a "Pizza d'Ontario"

flaming moe's

just overheard my neighbour saying "human growth hormones for the win!!"

bossa nova... the greatest innovation in music history...

coworker just hit me with the "we needed this rain" hell yeah brother you know it

no more taylor swift albums. enough i say

becoming one of those stupid dumbfucks who thinks baseball analytics is bad because i found out the blue jays have the best batting average in MLB right now

i love giving movies five big stars on letterboxd dot com

my haters gotta be hotels, the way they all hazbins.

Hey, remember tuna purse? I think Bluesky's issue is tuna purse, either too much or too little, can't decide.

Baseball fans love gravely declaring that “it’s time to have a conversation about” something.

its always so embarrassing when grown adults complain about mcdonalds buildings looking drab. who cares. grow up

Montreal Expos return

but black dynamite i sell gacha to the community

dude it was so fucking awesome they put the duck hunt dog in smash bros. that was funny as fuck

theres a certain point at which someone is so good at singing that they actually sound worse. you gotta hit that sweet spot. the best singers are always at least a little bit bad at singing

new chappel roan is fine i guess

ive always said mine would be some kind of completely unsuitable song that nobody would be happy with. Neutral Milk Hotel's Baby for Pree is the number one contender

The left has become completely silent on why we drive on a parkway but park in a driveway

i famously hate the foo fighters immensely but calling someone a "former foo" is great stuff

less than 24 hours from the deadline, don't forget to declare interest in the people you care about in your life

unfortunately the blue jays season is over and they will never win a baseball game ever again

i'll never forget when i first found out that Captain Save-a-Ho wasn't real. it was my parents saving those hoes.