Damn… They couldn’t have found a bigger stamp?

Oh for fuck sake. How is anyone still falling for this bullshit? You can’t just dig tunnels in Florida. Our unofficial state fish is the sink hole. Anyway. RIP Harry Potter land, swallowed by Elon Musk’s giant unfinished hole in the ground probably.

The He Gets Us ads are so funny because the people behind them are huge conservative evangelical weirdos and everyone online reacts accordingly but the actual content has precisely the energy I’d attribute to a mainline congregation whose flock are exclusively either 80 years old or dyed hair-havers

I'm hardly the first person to note this, but it's enormously instructive that our President and his followers saw the message "THE ONLY THING MORE POWERFUL THAN HATE IS LOVE" and understood it, correctly, as an attack on them

No, that kid was not Liam Ramos, as evidenced by his completely different head and face. Some of you really went off to the races with this.

President of the little monsters

This deserves to be spread as far and wide as what happened to Renee Good and Alex Pretti. apnews.com/article/immi...

Ill be honest, I dont really have it in me to hate Kamala Harris. Lady got stuck in an impossible situation, tried, failed, wasnt even really her fault, I just can't bring myself to be mad at her about it. Too much else going on to be worth it.

Took the public notary exam this morning and I have to wait three weeks to find out if I passed??

The ethos of Trumpism is the ethos of the most pathetic schoolyard bully: I can say and do anything to you, but if you say anything back, I will run mewling to the teacher. Just despicable liars nad snivvelers.

in an ideal world the trauma this couple went through *shouldnt* resonate stronger than a latino family terrorized by ice. but we dont live in that world. we live in the real world. so i applaud it when the most minnesota people possible link arms with us and FIGHT like this.

The strictly business-brained NFL exec who months ago foresaw the February 2026 vibes and then hired Bad Bunny

if bovino is out and conservatives are turning on noem then there is a real opportunity to demand that miller resign too.

The more I think about it, the more I’m convinced the Democrats have to push their hand immediately. The parallels with the delays and subsequent failures after January 6th are blaring warning signs about what will happen if they don’t go after the issues with ICE and CBP at the root RIGHT NOW.

The execution of Alex Pretti is playing so badly because you can look at his actions and life story - his last act was helping, boy scout, athlete, health care worker to veterans - and compare those to the men who killed him and know which you would want to be your son, brother, father, uncle.

I watched Tron: Ares on the plane yesterday. What dirt must Jared Leto have on some Disney executive to keep getting these opportunities?

Fair weather Bears fan

Got an email from Hilton calling my bluff about canceling my Honors account

extremely cool info environment to tweet something and a half hour later once it’s riled everyone up to be like “no haha jk it’s the opposite actually”

the post everyone got mad about for two hours has been updated turns out it's the opposite actually

Dorinda is shockingly subdued on Traitors. They need to let her sneak a few extra drinks

Stateside remix one of the best pop songs of the decade

internal ya fuckin right

New poll finds that 28% of US adults believe the force used by the ICE agent in Minneapolis was justified.

Why was the dad in Primate (2026) Bill de Blasio

I'm 100 pages into reading VINELAND right now and finding it fascinating seeing how it was adapted into One Battle After Another. Just passed the scene that became Willow meeting Regina Hall in the bathroom. A lot of anxiety about television in the book-- surely Pynchon was onto something in 1990.

This is the most pathetic thing I’ve seen all day, and the competition was fierce.

Remember when Trump announced he was unilaterally ending congestion pricing, literally calling himself a "king" while doing that, but then nothing happened because there was no actual mechanism for it even if it hadn't been illegal and now everyone loves it

The largest generation in U.S. history is in their 70s now. And Stephen Miller’s podcaster wife thinks it’s suspicious that there’s a huge surge in home health aides.

Marty Supreme was awfully similar to Uncut Gems and Good Time but thankfully I love those movies

People posting “He is risen!” for Christmas…

Lost the Powerball again… Christmas is ruined

The Grinch IP was way over-saturated this year, but people are doing too much about Grinch 2000. It’s a clever movie with a level of craftsmanship we’d be lucky to see these days. People hating on it are just following the pendulum. Save your ire for Grinch 2018

To their credit: a lot of NYPD on the L tonight, and they were actually in the railcar with us for once

A podcast asked me to record a voice note about my prediction for 2026 and here it is.

So Wiles definitely called Musk a ketamine addict right? And then they couldn’t use the word addict for fear of legal issues?

Kilmar Abrego Garcia is free. every bit of cruelty, boasting, slander, and persecution was for absolutely fucking nothing.

Baby’s first Turkey Trot!! 🦃

Wait uh if you watch through to the end of the clip THEY TRIED TO BUY TACOS FROM A SHOP WHERE THEY HAD PREVIOUSLY KIDNAPPED A WORKER, WHO IS STILL DETAINED

I'd have to dig through the archive of my old tweets but I definitely remember being big mad about Merrick Garland in December 2020 and I feel so vindicated now...

This will be drastically different from their usual strategy of calling every Democrat a gay Muslim communist

Couldn't be more excited for this book!!

okay as a big proponent of yelling ‘do something’ at the democrats i think we need a brief moratorium on yelling ‘do something’ at the democrats. they’re doing a thing right now. the thing is not voting to fund the government until that funding includes the healthcare subsidies

if i were a would-be dictator whose only civilian check on power had been consumed by total-complete partisan loyalty, something i would definitely do is call an unprecedented in-person meeting of the only people who could stop me and then proceed to illustrate why they should stop me

It's becoming clear that this is not an administration that is popular or skilled enough to do the consolidation needed to implement actual fascism, so they've decided that constantly creating fascism-flavored content is good enough

if these companies would just put out a statement saying “we told him to go fuck himself” they would instantly have the type of loyal and dedicated customer base corporations dream of and spend decades trying to cultivate

I think the real failure of liberals and the left here is failing to actually tell people how immigration actually works because they seem to think you just fill out your paperwork and if you're a good person you get a visa

The question has been "how can we tell these masked government thugs from people pretending to be masked government thugs?" and the answer isn't just "we can't" but that not being able to tell is the point. Republicans want to encourage & activate independent vigilante kidnapping & brutality squads.

Got my first new R211 on the B train yesterday morning and it was soooo smooth 🤩