TL;DR: Trevor Bauer is ending his NPB career being pulled from the playoff roster for blowing a scrimmage game against a semipro team that hasn't developed any meaningful baseball talent since before the bicentennial, after ending the season DEAD LAST in ERA along qualified pitchers.

The only thing they do during a ceasefire is reload.

When you’re that big of a dickhead, of course you’d assume a circumcision is in the same category as a lobotomy 🥁💥

We all know that active user numbers are used when pitching to funding or advertising, this is obtuse. Also: blaming the user for not using something the engineer never built is a classic tell of either a junior or an asshole.

Same with recessions, almost always under a Republican president. Its almost like those motherfuckers dont know how to run a country.

while the Dems are looking for anyone with juice, my large son is fully dipped with hot peppers.

Amazing that it hits every beat from 80s adventure movie scenes from the bumbling oafs yelling “Get him!” and taking the worst angles, our hero getting the bicycle to go in the nick of time, and beingjustoutofreach at the last second. Put some John Williams over it

I know, I know, clearly someone with a fetish for getting yelled at, but… How do you put on some NY Tough Guy act elsewhere and are *this* fucking bad at roasting?

Don't suppose anybody in the room took it upon themselves to ask anybody in this admin why they'd rather have dead kids than autistic ones?

“(sigh) For the *10th* time, Mr Musk…”

Holy shit, I think even my non-posting ass eventually made it out of the grays (probably via Gizmodo or io9). You just had to not be a dick / be a good hang. And now I see the problem.

Neat.

if that news is true, don't say anything you wouldn't want to see screenshotted and spread all over right wing media

Well their train’s not called the Dub is it

Going through their own personal “Now Martin’s scoring off me” hell and I love this for them 🫶🏻

Remember, the people who say that the National Guard is needed in Chicago either live in the suburbs, aren’t prepared to have a nuanced conversation regarding history, never been here, have unresolved trauma, or, quite frankly, exhibit sucka behavior. Punitive measures rarely help the marginalized.

👀 Currently 6W clear of last year’s White Sox, but certainly in the driver’s seat for differential ignominy

MLB announcing 2026 regular season schedules in August during Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce’s engagement announcement is perfectly Manfred-pilled

You’re telling me this guy is not a more desirable guy to promote than Gavin Newsom

I… don’t hate this? SMRs look super promising but were having trouble finding initial customers from what I’ve read. If a data center must be fired up, better this than rekindling coal or gas

Making homemade explosives to blow up a homeless encampment

It was so dumb but I watched the VHS of HOT TO TROT (1988) so many times over summers as a kid

reverse heist movie where a single snake has to chase all the priests back into ireland

Woof… Man was it shortsighted to fuck around & lose what NBA they had.

Approving your own code change

Set my budget for today’s ticket at the win spread. lol Thanks (I guess) to Halos fans for being so accommodating that I’m still 3rd row upper tank just over a batter box 😂

Powder/baby blue team uniforms generally work and teams that don’t work them in are turning down free money

Ugh, getting dangerously close to actually shopping for tickets for that Sunday getaway game at Anaheim

Yeah man, that’ll keep the fascists at bay.

There are no Epstein Files in Ba Sing Se

Lmao Hawks kicking things off as banner-raising cannon fodder

While we’re here? That pointy-headed jagbag would be nothing without UIUC. Thinks he deserves the world because he copy/pasted Mosaic to make Navigator. Do not cite the deep magic to me, witch. I had them both installed side-by-side at the time.

Went back and looked at last year & G95 was the start of the 🤢21G losing streak🤢. So if this year’s batch is going to put some separation between themselves & infamy, they have between now & ~8/8 to stack as many wins as possible. CLE, PIT, TB, CHC, PHI, LAA, SEA. Not ideal, but not insurmountable

On this, this Independence Day weekend, they are making me choose between my garbage failsons

Penn administrators:

[In the imperial core as violence is visited upon the periphery] haha fuck yeah!! yes!! [As the violence visited upon the periphery returns to the imperial core] well this fucking sucks. what the fuck.

Masterful gambit, sir

globalize the empanada and make the world delicious

It’s the little things that people miss when they sync the movie up with Dark Side 🫧

Didn’t realize we hit the Baseball Equinox yesterday. I guess 5 wins is technically a better pace, but still… woof.

In a season where they’re treading water just above Historically Godawful and had the Good Pope Vibes, table was set for another shit year in obscurity. But no, That Strain in the fanbase just couldn’t not embarrass the fuck out of everyone

Establishment Democrats fell all over themselves to endorse the most demonstrable piece of shit on the ballot and their electorate definitively told them to fuck right off. I don’t want to see another poll about how not being more centrist cost them the presidency. Not having principles cost them.

It’s so weird to have a pope that knows Joe Crede. You can prepare for a lot but not for that.

Fegan just nonchalantly dropping a devastating quote in the middle of an @whitesox.bsky.social update. cc @nickbpss.bsky.social

Yo dawg, we heard you liked interesting times.

The Anakin-Padme meme, except: “The Rockies have broken -200 RD.” “Sure, after game 100-something in the dog days of August, right?”

What a way with words

After the library plaque shenanigans city leadership pulled up for a heat check blanketing the area over there with shit like this and whew buddy did it airball

“Look for the helpers.”