Dairy Queen announced today that they will be changing their name to "Dairy Nonbinary Monarch". Burger Queen throws a thumbs up.

Things that help calm the nervous system, quickly: - Box breathing (in for 4, hold for 4, out for 4, hold for 4, repeat) - Immerse your face in cold water (activates mammalian dive reflex) - Humming (stimulates vagus nerve) - Exercise (anything helps, outside even better) - Impeachment and removal

Gus exited his cave this morning and we accidentally started a new religion.

“As a deranged old man slumps in his seat at the pinnacle of power, so bereft of any empathy or intellect, a full summation of his defects of character makes one shudder with the recognition that we have a madman at the wheel and the cliff is fast approaching.” open.substack.com/pub/noelcasl...

my entire timeline on x is now just iranian embassies demonstrating a facility with the english language that puts everything i've ever read from the trump administration to shame

Enter the Dragon Roll

The horse op-ed is an instant classic. I can't tell you how much joy this piece gives me. It should be taught in every introductory writing class in no small part because the horse arguments are so compelling. "I have noticed that human children get to eat cake. But I am bigger than the children."

We don't do this out of anger or revenge. We do it because principle has to mean something. New piece open.substack.com/pub/adamkinz...

Hey did everyone see Clavicular get his ass beat after he challenged a cancer survivor leftist to a jujitsu match, who said as he was choking him out ‘this is for all the bullshit I gotta watch on my fucking feed’… we need more of this not more podcasts

This story was basically repeated in 1959 (with 14th Amendment rights unchallenged) when Bruce Lee returned to his birthplace to explore his US citizenship. Also San Francisco.

His "accomplishments" and plans are horrific, but I find I have to admit a huge truth: Trump is a flawless leader, in that whatever he proposes his base will follow. If only he had a clue what he was leading them, and us, into.

Shout out to the top 5 kings in the world, Martin Luther, Larry, Don, Stephen and Americans don't have a motherfuckin'.

This is a brilliant skit‼️ #VeryAccurate

I saw a naked man strolling out of the art museum's Impressionists Exhibition. I asked his opinion so I could get an exhibitionist's impression.

Shouldn't we have gotten at least a few blurry satellite pics of aluminum tubes by now?

I love watching bodybuilders complain about their placings in competitions. It's basically gargantuan men insisting that they are the prettiest one there.

I love my ranch-sitting job in Texas, I never know what I’ll see at the ranch across the road.

It’s not leadership anymore it’s a circus, and everyone’s fighting for center ring.

Zebra ninjas.

What would normally be presidency-ending scandals not even a blip on the radar Daily

Southcom strikes which illegally kill people on boats in the Carribean that three months ago elicited shocked headlines in US news media are now being reported in low priority spaces buried deep in news outlet websites. Normalisation of what are in effect US military death squads.

You can't... repeal... a scientific finding. At that point it's just called lying about it.

Rep. Delia Ramirez to DHS officials: "I have as much respect for you as I do for the last white men who put on masks to terrorize communities of color. I have no respect for the inheritors of the Klanhood and the slave patrol. Those activities were criminal and so are yours."

Elon Musk: “We do not go to the Moon because it is easy, but because going to Mars is hard.”

I have determined that the fastest way to bring the United States to the highest level of Success, Sanity, and Democracy, is to cease Operations for an approximately two year period of time, with a scheduled Grand Reopening that will rival and surpass anything.

Needed to get to the bank but wasn't feeling good about driving on ice or walking in chunky refrozen snow. So instead, I took a picture of the cash in my wallet with my phone and submitted it as a mobile deposit. So convenient!

A variation on #Liz48 that is quicker and easier: "There will be neither general strikes nor mass protests if Trump is declared ineligible, I assure you. They only thing people will be doing in the street is dancing." #Section3 #Removal

So fast!! Our local multiplex has already sold 12 seats for Friday. Not at the same showing, 12 in total over 4 showings. That says MUST WATCH, doesn't it. (I wonder if this movie is part of her "no divorce until 2029" incentive package?)

my emerging theory is that the political press literally does not believe in objective reality in any meaningful sense. there is only what A says and what B says and how that affects the horse race

Four-time Grammy Award nominee Jesse Welles performs his song "Join Ice." Bob Dylan once said a single folk singer could defeat an entire army. Ladies and gentlemen, I think we have our man.

Get ready for "I deserve a Nobel Prize for preventing a war in Greenland!"

“I’ll see you in helvetica!” - damning with font praise

For the record, I have no recollection of a "Let's annex Greenland" mandate, no ads or anything.

DOJ Releases Jerome Powell Deepfake Nudes https://theonion.com/doj-releases-jerome-powell-deepfake-nudes/

The Norwegian Nobel Prize committee has been forced to make a statement, declaring that the prize cannot be transferred. It's hard even to comprehend how stupid this has become

gah look at this! Look at the photos! and then read the interview because it's also amazing: globalvoices.org/2026/01/08/w...

Scariest thought of the day: Trump is profoundly ignorant, rumored to be a functioning illiterate with minimal IQ. Yet his narcissism demands that he surround himself only with followers who are weaker and less intelligent than he is, hence no experts in his administration. Exponential stupidity.

It’s genuinely wild that the United States spent decades building an elaborate rules-based international order which de facto cemented its permanent status as the dominant global hegemon, sustained by ideology rather than might, and now is just blowing it all up for literally no reason

It sounds so ridiculous, doesn't it? It is a great analogy‼️

Does Congress ever reassert its power in any meaningful way or do they accept their castration and admit it’s just a launching pad for podcasters and no longer an effective branch of government? Was a 79 year-old drug addict too much of an adversary for our once mighty republic?

The Emperor's New Brain Damage

The Hitchcock side of town.

Excellent article by Dr Frank George

Picked something up off my carpet and it turned out to be a dead stinkbug. And now I have to amputate my fingers.

"The car you're looking at can sit six people without any problems." I don't think I know six people without any problems.

Made 'from' a raspberry, or made 'for' a raspberry? (tiny either way, but moreso the latter)