The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald but it's about the container ship that was carrying all those Garfield phones

oh my god... if you think backwards to what monkey-brain stimulus would prompt this response, the Epstein news about to come out is gonna be so big that *right-wingers* have been calling him for comment

My favorite trick I learned about was devs taking a screenshot of the game right when you hit pause, and then placing that screenshot behind the menu so they could do whatever they want behind it without the player knowing.

I think it's important to mark @victoriascott.bsky.social et al coining "the lithium curtain" here before The Wall Street Journal inevitably picks up on it within the next three years

real long shot here but if you have any idea why melania is suddenly talking about epstein, reach me on signal at marisakabas.04 anonymity fully protected

can't think of a ludonarrative moment more enlightening about the modern Republican mindset than "why am I trying to balance this budget, I don't give a fuck about Bug Mars"

"how do you do, fellow kids" in 2016, 2006, and 1996, respectively

Hi

this is the most amazing account on Bluesky

Take a moment to remember how weird it is our president communicates with us through a bottom-tier social media site called Truth Social. It’s like if he governed from the comment section of a porn site.

and likely to remain so. not that the tech is devoid of value or potential; just that *none of that dormant potential is in a form that will generate profit for anyone long-term*. once again tapping the sign: you can't claim IP protection for exfiltrated model weights generated from stolen data

sounds like he'll have lamped the usa

"mailing lists were large group emails in old typewriter font" okay so, first of all: rude,

seriously doubt this is "unprecedented" in the context of a planet where the majority of natural phenomena were explained even within *recorded* history as "a god did it"

@grok is this true

🗨️

thank you for this screenshot mister president, I hope to use it again real soon

the onion - a decade ahead of its time

one time I fweefed in class and everyone heard it. they called me fartdick for years

Trading on oil prices or anything like these guys do is so fucking pathetic. Just be poor. Just scrape by instead. There's a lot more dignity in it. "I'm rich." Ok man.

Bad Religion:

Much like Franz Ferdinand, Trump is asking the world to "Take Me Out"

groove is stored in the heart

trump is kind of the bizzaro franz ferdinand in that if some serbian guys assassinated him it would set off more or less the opposite of world war one

furthermore, the ratification of a treaty (watertight or not) does not abate this. you don't keep a guy who unlatched his safety on your homies around because he eventually put the gun away

Women

"Trump agreeing to a surrender like it's the iTunes TOS" 100% tracks

Face-Eating Monkey Looks Calm At The Moment

this post made Donald Trump so mad he threatened to annihilate Persia from the entire planet

the whole "the US wasted millions of dollars on the Fisher Space Pen instead of just giving the astronauts pencils like the USSR" story is so funny. yeah man, if there was one thing Soviet scientists were good at, it was assessing the risks of loose graphite around experimental high-yield technology

would you deadname they/them hitler??

the length of the table of contents in "united states involvement in regime change"

House Democrats to Trump secretly as they trade on it:

first day as a lawyer for Michael Jackson’s estate….biopic is moving along….now to take a big sip of coffee and check out the settlement terms with one of the children he was accused of abusing pitchfork.com/news/michael...

he's gone past "I could shoot someone in broad daylight on 5th Avenue" and straight to "I could shoot EVERYONE in broad daylight on 5th Avenue"

the right wing mil-industrial fantasy of the "tac nuke", normalized by a shameful amount of uncritical media (e.g. cod), is a wicked prayer from the worst people alive looking to normalize what OP is saying. a belief that w the right tech we can Nuke Them Only A Little, Which Would Make It Practical

the president is planning to destroy the world? tsk tsk!

they’re still afraid to say “impeach” because that would mean the status quo ante trumpum is no longer in effect

IT'S HAPPPENING

📞 DEMARCUS! DeMarcus, it's MARVIN! Your COUSIN? Marvin COUSINS?!?

and that's what makes him the clear Democratic frontrunner for 2028, according to The Democrats

as an American Jew, I do not believe that the world in which America is no longer safe for me because of my identity could ever include an Israel that would be

The Garden of Earthly Delights (detail), by Hieronymus Bosch, 1480-1505, 📸 by @alexbrandon

okay, so obviously, fuck editing, shit's for cowards, but has anyone suggested a "Recall Post" button (delete post and return to drafting view with its content, and maybe the option to reply to a different post if, say, you accidentally had two different threads open across two different tabs)

god this is so embarassing. imagine if you went to a bar and a little icon popped up over your head saying how much time you spend at the bar

"German Cards Against Humanity" is only about four or five letters away from an *extraordinarily* unfortunate typo