"Tala-freako" because, again, they're all twelve years old

Not even 8:30am yet and I'm already reading a page on JPL's website for background research purposes, my job could be way worse

If the corporations are doing well and the people are doing poorly What you have is a hostage situation not an economy

If we're all made in God's image then God has to be non binary, except those assholes believe women are just broken men and obviously a masculine god can create men and inferior men

I have never understood why anti-abortion activists are content to use lying and grossing people out as their main rhetorical tactics. Surely if God is on your side you'd have better ways to make your point?

On an individual level: no one should feel obliged to have a child that they, personally, do not want. On a societal level: saying no one at all should have children is loser, depression, doomer shit. Having children is a radical act of hope and belief that a better world is possible.

The last thing you see before opening ChatGPT

"Doctors don't get enough shit for denying care in abortion ban states" Be serious. If they lose their license or get dropped from malpractice insurance that harms hundreds of patients. Their hands are tied and the state legislators passing these farcical laws know it.

For some reason my algorithm is feeding me a bunch of micro preemie NICU content both real and from scripted television and it's making me anxious. I'm 36.5 weeks pregnant. I had a growth scan today where baby's estimated weight was over 7 pounds. That is not my path at this time. And yet!

Could there be a better example of "the trans debate" than 98% of women supporting trans people and then one single lone person voting against them and getting their way regardless. It's all such a fucking sham

a horse walks into a bar and says to the barman, "on a right angled triangle with sides x, y and z, if x and z are perpendicular which side is opposite the right angle?", and the barman says "y, the long face"

Toddler and husband are napping. I'm not a napper, so I'm taking this opportunity for rest time to catch up on Celebrity Jeopardy, play Stardew Valley, and eat a cookie my toddler won't try to steal 👸🏻

A majority of your relationship with your child will be with them as an adult, and you should spend their childhood making sure you build that future relationship as best you can.

YOUR LAB BILL IS PAST DUE Sit the fuck down, Quest Diagnostics, this is the first time you've sent me the bill and it is $2.25. I'm happy to pay it! You just have to tell me the amount and give me the bill number before I can pay it. Do you see how you're the problem here?

the only "bsky is a bubble" take you will ever need

Actual slightly spicy take: a lot of the day to day is boring, and your ability to stay regulated has a lot to do with your boredom tolerance (especially when your kids are very little and need both near constant supervision and constant modeling of emotional regulation)

Most decisions are temporary and you make them over and over, which means you can change your mind. Don't stress over every tiny decision like it's life altering. Save it for the ones that are actually big.

Clanga imo

THAT'S my President

Was gonna bemoan second chances after lazy clearances on set pieces but I guess I don't have to, thanks flag

Stop calling bullshit fouls on Chawinga, we're bored

Chawinga should never be that open but damn I'm glad she was

CHAAAAAAAWIIIIIIIIIIINGAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Vlatko doing this interview got me like "Dad, come home, the babysitter's weird"

Oooh, that was bold by Croix

Sometimes I think the “I come onto social media to get out of my bubble” is a white boy phenomenon like free-climbing or wing-suiting where white men have so little actual adrenaline risks in their day to day lives that they need to artificially construct it

God, I love a LaBonta goal from distance

If Sophia plays against us, she's gonna score. One of few things that is possibly more inevitable than Chawinga.

Alabama going to the WCWS with a chance to win the whole damn thing and we can't go because I am too pregnant for life 😭

Learned today that if your toddler smacks the blood pressure cuff while it's measuring, it messes up the results. First reading was 138/132, took it again without interference and it was 110/68 🤣

(tapping the sign) The secret service locking down the white house because of gunshots a couple of blocks away is normal. The weird thing is that nobody will shut up about this shit (isn't he at Bedminster anyway?).

We made the grave mistake of getting to the farmers market just before 10am which only further reinforced that we are early farmers market people

I'd say that I hope some of his offensive linemen have a similar response, but....would we be able to tell?

It's not that Ryan Gosling isn't attractive (and he's definitely aging well!) it's that I am of a certain age where I will always first think of him as a total liability in pass coverage with a super racist dad

My mom just sent me these photos of 137kg/300lbs of dried pasta made from wheat grown at their house in Sicily 🤯 she said they're looking into shipping some directly to us, which will be the best day of my 2 year old's life 🤣 Baby sister? Meh. Mail order pasta? That's the stuff.

i think the hate comes down to not realizing star wars is made for children? oh are mando episodes glued together a bad film? not to children!

There have been some absolutely wild throws to first by pitchers in this tournament 👀

Trans people have been around your whole life. You’ve been sharing bathrooms with them your whole life. They’ve been in your communities your whole life. They’ve even been playing sport your whole life. And you didn’t care *at all* till a few years ago when every right wing org decided you should

Two year old just asked for a dog completely unprompted and now is NOT the time, buddy

More cowbell imo!

This week in low stakes moments of self discovery, I realized that I really like my nails short and oval shaped. It's low fuss and low maintenance and idk, I think it's pretty cute. It also goes against years of feeling like I should want longer nails in a more elaborate shape.

it’s so funny that millions of people will see a dude that won’t even bother to go to *his own son’s wedding* and be like “I bet he is looking out for my personal well-being, and would also like me personally if we ever met”

Acrobat has gotten so expensive and so bloated that companies no longer just pay for an enterprise license and Adobe has stripped features out of it what seems like every year and how am I supposed to type in these stupid PDFs now

Someone replied to this "some of us have FODMAPs" and I'm losing it because A) that's not a national cuisine, it's not even relevant B) FODMAP isn't a diagnosis, it's a characteristic of foods. Some people avoid them or avoid certain sources, but nobody "has FODMAPs"

there are more of us (beanthusiasts) than there are of them (legumophobes)

I'm laughing at the Trump skipping Jr's wedding discourse because my dad has a long standing "one wedding per person barring tragedy" rule and I'm extremely sure he'd apply that to me and skip my second wedding if I were to get divorced and have one 😂

Lord help me, I did the whole thing

"baby is the size of a head of romaine lettuce!" I'm 36 weeks pregnant. She's over 6 pounds. Baby is the size of a newborn 😂

I truly wish people in this country ACTUALLY understood what the criminal punishment system is rather than what they want it to be. The criminal punishment system is FUEL for fascism. People really need to understand this to their core.

The Feds got what they wanted which was to make these people's lives hard and to make it expensive. When you have to deal with these charges, you need good representation (which costs money), you need to keep going to court which fucks with your job, you have to deal with emotional trauma, etc. etc.