Please do not share this interview with Rep. James Talarico by Stephen Colbert. It will piss off the chair of the FCC youtu.be/oiTJ7Pz_59A?...

Twue wuv.

OATCLICK: The action of selecting one’s dairy preference for coffee on an office vending machine. #pangram

#SuperBowlLX Update: For those interested in watching the alternative, “All American” half-time show, go to your local streaming platform, find the “filter” dropdown menu and click “racist.”

I needed to make more cowboy candy (sweet pickled jalapeños) and I made way too much brine. And that is how I wound up with 2 qts of cowboy candy (we’re a homemade crunch wrap-intensive household), sweet hot pickled carrots, 2 jars of sweet hot pickled pearl onions (for martinis), Officer.

As for me and my family, we shall eat food from the #Pokemon shows and games. Made by my older child, this is croissant curry from #PokemonZA. And we were surprised that it rocked.

How mutually assured destruction works. www.pbs.org/newshour/pol...

I’m calling it: FIFA Award for Best Picture

Driving around in Florida and noticed that Southern Blvd (which leads to TFG’s house) in West Palm Beach has been renamed after TFG Theres no official street sign on the part where we were, but it’s on the GPS

Flags at half mast and lots of sobbing www.hollywoodreporter.com/tv/tv-news/c...

Ice cream counts toward one’s calcium intake, right?

My final article for The Times: A quasi-therapy session about summoning the competitive gamer in me www.nytimes.com/2026/01/26/c...

Not happy. Thank goodness i remembered to put my car wipers up 🙄

No kidding. The only thing left out of the headline is that they were shared with a “secret data-sharing agreement with an unidentified political advocacy group whose stated aim was to find evidence of voter fraud and overturn election results in certain states” www.theguardian.com/us-news/2026...

BREAKING: Immigration officers are asserting sweeping power to enter homes without a judge’s warrant, a memo obtained by AP says.

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TORYPLAY: A UK-specific fetish involving members of the Conservative Party. #pangram

LATTECIZE: An exercise program for seniors that involves aerobics performed to music while balancing a cup of hot coffee in each hand. The inventor of this program may or may not be on the run from the law.

I would have become a travel writer, but there doesn't appear to be much of a market for articles with titles like "Wind Chill: Not a Fan"

PCINNAMON: A popular product from the Politically Correct Spice Co.

Really enjoying this new phase of my life where I can rewatch a series like it’s brand new because I don’t remember watching it in the first place

Never been prouder of my home state. But if your name is Tim, please sleep with one eye open.

I don’t want to live in a Christian country I want to live in a country where i have the right to choose to be a Christian - or a Muslim, or a Buddhist, or a Jew or an atheist.

There is absolutely nothing better than watching Andy Cohen and Anderson Cooper host New Year’s Eve while they’re three sheets to the wind.

Filed my final Wordplay column yesterday. — 30 —

An important reminder, and one reason why Finland is whipping our butts in the documentation wars. m.youtube.com/watch?v=Wof0...

As we glide effortlessly into a new year of please-god-not-too-many-horrors, I think it’s important to gird our collective loins, so I would like to remind everyone about how important they are:

I know this is a tough time of year for many people, and I wish you all a safe and happy holiday with whatever chosen family you have 🩵

Merry Erev Christmas to those who celebrate

"Paul Stanley's a singer? With what group, now? Sure, put him in the tent with the trapeze artist. Marketing says that screams 'caffeinated.'" - Proctor & Gamble executives, just before they came down from their collective acid trip m.youtube.com/watch?v=hMa1...

Curling up on a cold night with a boot, as one does

What an incredible send-off! My deepest love to the #NYTGames desk and flex desk for making me feel so valued. 🩵

Have you looked at your NYT Games Highlights for 2025?

Lighting the first candle tonight with pain in my heart for the victims of Bondi Beach. And may a hero like Ahmed Al Ahmed, who disarmed one of the shooters and was shot himself, be celebrated for the righteous man he is.

When you Google "Is breaking and entering a felony or a misdemeanor?" and it's actually research for a column, Your Honor

crossword puzzles have done more for texting slang than a million teens ever could

Well this is just lovely. Thank you, PuzzCulture puzzculture.com/2025/11/13/d...

LABORCON: Also known as Braxton-Hicks contractions. Usually accompanied by hospital personnel telling you to go home because it’s not time yet.

Flags at half mast for John Noble Wilford, the journalist who wrote this story. Obit in comments.

Cause of death: Email.

A visual representation of misdirection in crossword clues, as performed by a dog

The Nobel Prize committee should announce the World Cup winner tomorrow

OK, I’ve missed you all long enough. Charles and I will be returning to the ACPT in April as freeloaders, sorry, judges. Who am I going to get to hug there?

BEMEIN: To present someone with a bowl of chow mein.

I have decided to self-diagnose myself with a condition that I am calling Seasonal Chimera Hair. Every winter, the left side of my hair remains curly, and the other side straightens out into a frizzy mess. No amount or type of product helps.

I feel like Gen Z is getting short shrift here

Not surprised by the most-used words, but loving the fact that the first word is “irresponsible”

Incredibly honored to have my attempts at plausible deniability commemorated in Natan Last’s fabulous book, “Across the Universe.” You should buy his book #ididntdoit

This dog is feeling some things …