List three things you can talk about for three hours with prep: 1. My mom 2. Vintage Pyrex 3. Evangelical Church trauma

Its not the simulation Its the algorithm

Manny Jacinto posted this bc he knows how sad and anxious we all are

Nails are the tap shoes of the fingers

I always feel so accomplished and proud when a phlebotomist compliments my veins. 💅

Please, let me never find this out about Down A Dark Hall.

"No! There are no vampires in my class!" The bit continues, lore growing more dense by the day. For example, we have recently learned that El Vampiro is a Saja Boys fan.

Pharmallama

i’m so old, i remember when going on the internet made you smarter

I should've hidden it from myself.

In retrospect, there's no reason to hide my candy corn at the house because no one else wants it.

Cool enough to have a conversation with a youth about music because of my Lady Gaga shirt. She was very impressed I went to Monster Ball.

Who taught my kid about Gucci

When I was a sixth grader my childhood pastor did a truly frightening sermon on the rapture and hid a trumpet player up in the rafters.l I still think about how scary it was when I thought I heard the rapture trumpets.

I don’t wear perfume I just smell like the last woman who wore this thrift shopped jumper before me

maybe buying a lot of decorative gourds would fix me

Found nine containers of Lysol wipes in storage. Thanks, ADHD!

Alice asked me what a BBL is this morning.

I would watch a feature-length documentary about the origins, history, and usefulness of the classic Ikea bag.

Become a better teammate with one simple trick: ❌ don't bring your ego ✅ bring manchego

Let people like things they like even if you think it’s not cool.

Breaking News: beans

My kingdom for a supply

when someone says, “I grew up evangelical and I remember…” they’re about to say the most psychedelic shit you’ve ever heard

I'm excited for a better job market

Things aren’t feeling very easy breezy beautiful covergirl atm

My mom's favorite seasonal drink!

The only hot honey I care about is MY WIFE

Someone watched ABC's Wife Swap and is a little jealous she never got to make a binder for the other participant.

Phil turned on a sci-fi show and Alice put her head in his lap and is asking questions about the story and the science and I'm not going to interrupt this (for either of them) for something as mundane as bedtime. He has been waiting for this her entire life, if not his.

I am also a young lion* from 1979 *Astrologically

hey mind if i collect your blood in this bejeweled goblet its not for a spell

It's so pretty here, you guys.

Put it in the Louvre

I sincerely believe the end of Google Reader was when the Internet started to get worse instead of better

straight from Chicago, it's alt-hip hop pioneers A Cow Called Bess Can I kick it? (Yes, you can!) Can I kick it? (Yes, you can!) Can I kick it? (Yes, you can!) Can I kick it? (Yes, you can!) Can I kick it? (Yes, you can!) Can I kick it? (Yes, you can!) Can I kick it? (Yes, you can!)

I AM SO EXCITED FOR DINNER (schnitzel)

White Ladying* *Buying and burning a pumpkin scented candle

From the kitchen confidential sub 👨‍🍳 Farm to table: Sysco driver is from Kansas

Do I know any indie game devs -- especially solo! -- who would be willing to speak to high school students in Washington DC next month?

I'm pretty sure I still have a couple

My barrettes say trans rights

@sentimentbot.bsky.social what's my vibe

PEOPLE BE FUCKING NORMAL CHALLENGE

You can use your free will to make a lasagna. Like literally you can just Google the recipe, buy the ingredients, and make a lasagna. And then you have lasagna!

Poster for SHE'S WORKING HER WAY THROUGH COLLEGE (1952) How was this artwork never used in a 1980s punk flyer? I mean, Virgina Mayo's holding up Ronald Reagan's decapitated head for God's sakes.

🗣️It’s driving me out of my mind…. Happy 58th Birthday, Ricky Bell 🎉🎊🎈 #BBD

Our raffle benefit for Annunciation is here! $10/entry via Venmo • 70+ prizes • Local pickup in Mpls • All funds donated • Ends 9/24 Organized by the team at James Irving Salon, with contributions from artists, makers & small businesses across the Twin Cities bit.ly/MplsRaffleEntry