Tarl
@tarlbludworth.bsky.social
📤 462
📥 197
📝 420
Musician, dad, sleepy person.
pinned post!
You are a work of art. I want to pin you to the wall.
about 2 years ago
1
30
7
Tomorrow is my birthday and it is not too late for you to get me a 1950's style switchblade comb.
9 days ago
0
2
0
reposted by
Tarl
saja 🥀🖤
about 1 month ago
you've turned this blanket fort into a house of lies
1
50
18
Gonna try to relax and stop thinking about all of the terrible things in the world for a few hours.
about 1 month ago
1
3
0
reposted by
Tarl
Leggy Pain 🇨🇦🇵🇸🇺🇦
3 months ago
Whenever I watch a video set in Europe I get horny as hell for their affordable and plentiful public transportation options. Yes baby, get on that train, then let me watch you board an overnight ferry without a car 😍
3
30
8
reposted by
Tarl
Reneé Meredith
3 months ago
We need to verb more nouns. Like “Sorry I can’t go to your party I’m baked beansing that night.” Or “I totally cunted my way through that job interview.”
6
90
25
reposted by
Tarl
Anastasia MacKenzie
3 months ago
Inside you are two hungry hungry hippos. One always wants salty snacks. One always wants sweet. They both lost their marbles.
0
24
5
reposted by
Tarl
Anastasia MacKenzie
3 months ago
I feel like all my mental health issues would be solved if I could just spend a few minutes in nature every day and also get a million dollars.
3
33
7
reposted by
Tarl
Candy Elliott
4 months ago
Didn’t get to be a sexy nurse for Halloween so I’m going to be a slutty turkey for Thanksgiving.
4
56
15
reposted by
Tarl
💞 Lady Scarlett Blush - N/SFW VA & Writer 💞
4 months ago
I used what money I had to pay most of a car payment from last month and replace the the ignition coils. Turns out that might not be the only car issue and I still can't afford the testing I need done to start my 2nd job. Any amount helps.
add a skeleton here at some point
1
4
4
Got a jump on Halloween by dressing like a slutty vampire on October 1st and every day since then.
4 months ago
0
2
0
Celebrating hump day by getting fucked every way except the fun sexual ways.
4 months ago
0
2
0
reposted by
Tarl
Leggy Pain 🇨🇦🇵🇸🇺🇦
4 months ago
I would never get Botox. I need to be able to aggressively frown at Cybertrucks
7
170
28
I would love you more if you were a worm.
5 months ago
0
2
1
reposted by
Tarl
Queen RanDumb
5 months ago
I thought of the FUNNIEST thing to say last night in bed. I've forgotten it but man, real knee slapper
9
146
16
reposted by
Tarl
Grant Tanaka
5 months ago
you’re never more than 10 feet away from someone texting “lol” with a completely expressionless face
7
1549
326
reposted by
Tarl
Sweet Sugar Pie
6 months ago
My kingdom for the kind of unbridled, raucous, soul mending fuck you can’t silence through walls nor shame.
1
15
3
I was really motivated for about thirty minutes there
6 months ago
0
3
1
Wait, FTW means "For The Win" and not "Fuck The World"?? What's next? Are you gonna tell me LMAO doesn't stand for "Leave Me Alone, Ogre"?
6 months ago
2
6
1
Movies and television led me to believe I would encounter more unaccompanied pies cooling on windowsills.
6 months ago
0
3
0
reposted by
Tarl
The Sassiest Semite
7 months ago
I need new glasses & they’re almost $500, due to the universe blessing me at birth w/ partial blindness. If that’s something you wish to support, you can here. New posts soon but it’s writings, photography, playlists & occasional reminders that you matter. ✨🖤🌻
buymeacoffee.com/thesassiestsemite
loading . . .
TheSassiestSemite is weaving delicate webs of want & whimsy with words, wardrobes & wit.
🍾🎉RELAUNCHING🎉🍾 Hey there, it’s me! LittleMissLizz. TheSassiestSemite. TheTwitchyPixie. Punk Rock Amélie. That weird girl. Sometimes people just call me Lizz. Welcome to my Buy Me a Coffee Page - a pa
https://buymeacoffee.com/thesassiestsemite
1
23
6
reposted by
Tarl
Rocketgirl 🚀
7 months ago
I do have a spiritual side. I've seen Ghostbusters, like, ten times.
5
105
23
Love, laugh, lycanthropy
7 months ago
0
2
0
reposted by
Tarl
Anastasia MacKenzie
7 months ago
First they came for the extroverts, and I did not speak out because I’m very introverted.
0
24
7
reposted by
Tarl
gas station dream girl
7 months ago
Carpet Dime! Go out there and pick up that loose change from the floor!
7
81
29
I need some extra cash this summer, so for a small fee I will come by with a spray bottle and mist you with cold water every once in a while like you are produce at the grocery store.
7 months ago
0
3
0
Resting Daydreamer Face
8 months ago
1
3
0
reposted by
Tarl
Marl
8 months ago
"Get me some ice cream, I gave blood today" Him: "You can't say that every month!" {Clutches ovaries} "GASP"
9
229
38
I could never date someone who is much younger than me. I am too tired to learn new slang. I would just be agreeing to anything because I wouldn't know what she was talking about.
8 months ago
1
3
0
reposted by
Tarl
ThexyBeatht
8 months ago
There’s a road construction where I live that outlasted 3 of my relationships
7
34
2
I spent the last twenty years telling everyone I am 5'11 because that's what they told me in Army basic training. The nurse just told me I am a little over 6'. My life has been a lie. What have I been missing out on?
8 months ago
1
1
0
8 months ago
1
3
0
reposted by
Tarl
lisabug
8 months ago
[at roller rink] My fanny pack contains 237 marbles, in case I need to create a diversion.
10
327
95
Bring back those conversation pits in living rooms from the 1950's, but put some snakes & spiders in the pits to make the conversations more interesting.
8 months ago
1
1
0
reposted by
Tarl
Queen RanDumb
9 months ago
Tiptoe through the tulips only it's flailing through the fuckery.
2
129
30
This has been one of the worst days I've had in a long time. Should I keep acting happy in front of my kids or let them see how sad and stressed I am?
9 months ago
2
1
0
reposted by
Tarl
🦇𖤐Stephanie𖤐🦇
9 months ago
Me at 18: I can do whatever I want!! Me at 50: I can do whatever I want after this nap, 2 extra strength Tylenol and Advil...
1
9
1
reposted by
Tarl
𝒇𝒓𝒂𝒏𝒄𝒆𝒔𝒄𝒂 ✩
9 months ago
what do you mean carving out a space in my chest for you isn’t nonchalant I didn’t even decorate it fr
2
43
15
Pulled a damn muscle while frolicking in a field again.
9 months ago
0
20
6
9 months ago
2
5
0
reposted by
Tarl
Queen RanDumb
10 months ago
If my voice sounds funny it's bc I'm speaking directly out of my ass.
11
162
48
reposted by
Tarl
Canadia
10 months ago
The race between a dying vibrator & an orgasm…
12
67
6
reposted by
Tarl
Diotima
10 months ago
Some people clearly don’t remember the give part of take. They just take and take.
1
30
4
reposted by
Tarl
Juliett
10 months ago
How do I feel? Mostly with my hands and sometimes my tongue. Never with my heart.
1
97
37
You know you can rent yourself a bouncy castle any time you want? It doesn't have to be your birthday or anything.
10 months ago
1
6
1
reposted by
Tarl
Grant Tanaka
10 months ago
this one time, I was able to rob a bank armed with nothing but a notebook filled with poetry I wrote in the 8th grade
4
239
115
Load more
feeds!
log in