God hates book banners.

I hate double standards. Man can go topless and no one bats an eye but when I wear a skin suit I made out of a man everyone freaks out.

We got the long form census and I feel like I won the lottery. What stage of adulting is this?

Found a puppet that perfectly summarizes 2016-2026.

You’re not a real nerd until you look forward to filling out the census form.

“You got this, you can do hard things!” I tell myself as I mentally prep to answer an email.

The Right-wing view on education is simple: When it's what they want kids to be taught, it's education. When it's what they don't want them to be taught, it's indoctrination.

“Parents have the right to choose what their children are exposed to or have access to.”

The books the far right want to censor “to protect kids” have nothing inappropriate or sexual in it, but they do have LGBTQ characters and themes. And listen, if you find LGBTQ characters sexy that’s understandable. But it’s not inherently sexual. 1/2

Book banners be like “stop forcing sexuality down children’s throats!” and it’s literally just a book about penguins.

A Supernatural cookbook called Suppernatural.

I still have an urge to find an adult in a crisis before remembering it’s me. I’m the supposed adult.

Hey my husband and I saw you from across the room and we were wondering if you’d like to come home with us to watch Shrek 2.

Types of coworkers.

I’m never not thinking about him* 😍 *my cat

Not all murder films are up to snuff.

The peculiar in me recognizes the peculiar in you.

Me: I’m still young. The book I’m reading: “she was an older woman, a millennial…”

🚨‼️ALERT‼️🚨 THE MULTITUDES HAVE BROKEN CONTAINMENT.

Women should go back to traditional roles such as wise crone, feared town witch, siren who lures men to their doom…

Back in day we didn’t use AI, we hallucinated the good ol’ fashioned way using drugs.

More like “What’s Left of Earth Day,” am I right?

Happy You Day, Earth! 🌏 You’re looking particularly hawt! 🔥 (thanks to climate change 🤗)

You can learn a lot about a person by stalking them and secretly watching their every move.

Reality is pretty shit, but remember, books are still here for you. 📚

I don’t need alcohol to have a bad time.

Let the good times roll. Let the bad times crawl. Let the acceptable times do the hopscotch.

Why go out when you can stay home in your sweatpants and have snacks and do unspeakably dark magic on the couch?

Things to burn for stress relieve: Sage Lavender The patriarchy Chamomile

Therapist: and how do we respond when someone hurts us? Me: we make them in sims, make them go swimming, then take away the pool ladder?

Love the diversity on Artemis II. A person of colour, a woman, a Canadian.

April Fool’s today. Remember not to believe anything you read in the bird entrails.

The complete destruction of the capitalist system and the fall of patriarchy would fix me.

The only kings we need. #NoKings

Slow blink at people while delivering criticism so they don’t feel threatened. Follow me for more social tips!

“Our love made that.” I say to my husband, looking at our cat.

Lost in the sauce* *nutella

Me on planet Earth every day.

It is what it is, I say, when what it is, is absolutely horrific.

According to most serving sizes I am two adults. However, according to child-proof bottles I am one child.

Sugar and spice and very nice microplastics.

Life: Rated E for Eternal Horrors