I see Wendy Carlos. I post Wendy Carlos.

i'd settle for just one dead kennedy this year

I'm pretty sure Elon has made a copy of his dad with AI that tells him he's proud of him every night before he goes to bed

Rose didn't even need to be on that door smdh. could she not have been kept afloat by the buoyancy of her ginormous knockers

QTP with a gif to advertise your Bluesky account 🦋

Instant all-timer here:

there's women of all sorts of genders and sexualities. women are the Gatorade of people, and they're all fantastic.

Yes, Santa even went to Epstein Island

I went to Jupiter and got more stupider and now I'll never get into Harvard

Trump is like the Wizard of Oz if he left the curtains open the whole time

DEMOCRATS: Shut up about trans issues, we need to focus on ‘kitchen table’ issues! ALSO DEMOCRATS, TRYING TO TALK ABOUT ‘KITCHEN TABLE’ ISSUES

Pocket pussy but it's just Trump's thrussy

Starting a Weird Al parody band that parodies Weird Al songs by making them serious again

Don't forget to leave cocaine out for Santa this year. He really likes it.

It's kind of funny the future is just tech guys promising the future and then collapsing the economy gambling on the promise

I think this year might be my last on social media. It's a young man's game. I need to start wood working or maybe take up stalking.

I hate Hillary Clinton

If your ass had a soul it would be an ass soul

you know what's crazy? not one member of maga america will be able to connect a spike in venezuelan immigrants or refugees to anything the u.s. is doing to venezuela right now. not a single one.

I have a lot of hate in my heart and room for more

The blue no matter who people, who spent years telling the left to enjoy the camps for telling them that transphobia and genocide are wildly unpopular election-losing positions, ended up voting for a sexual predator *not* running as a democrat who was endorsed by Trump, Musk, and Miller. Who lost.

If you hear someone use the term suicidal empathy just know they're a pedophile

[shaking Magic 8 Ball] Should we pull the plug on Grandma

Some of the Stranger Things kids have Ozempic skin

i love tariffs...ta riff with my homies

It's fine when Nazis die and I won't pretend like it isn't

I assume in the wake of the Nuzzi thing there’s gonna be people who think “I should do the REAL story on RFKj” even though everyone knows the real story and either acknowledge he sucks or pretend they think he’s great. All the facts are out about him: he’s legit evil and most likely insane

Guy who ruins Thanksgiving and and his no nut November by suddenly ejaculating an endless jet in the middle of saying grace. Grandparents are terrified, shrieking prayers. Aunts and uncles frantically trying to escape the room with their families. The turkey is beyond salvage

scrolling through the suicide note to get to the recipe

Gotta cover up that thrussy

when I was stationed in Japan back in 2004 I blew the biggest load of my life in the woods on base and I've been chasing that dragon ever since it was like I was peeing cum

How do I explain to my kids Santa isn't real but Krampus is and he's coming for them?

what a day

lol it's real

Wait, wasn’t there something else he should be remembered for? Oh that’s right, murdering a half million people for oil contracts

bro I am Legion bro I'm like full of demons bro help me bro

why can't this be us

You know the United States sworn enemy since WW2 the NAZIS? The Coast Guard says it's cool to have their iconography tattooed all over your body. They killed thousands of U.S. soldiers and tried to exterminate an entire group of people. I wonder why the people in charge are cool with that ... Oh ...

On Trans Day of Remembrance, we mourn those who have lost their lives to transphobic violence, hatred and discrimination. Trans rights are human rights. Today, let us commit to building a kinder society where everyone can live in peace, dignity and freedom.

It's crazy that if everyone left Twitter it would crash it and fuck Elon but they all stay. Why?

You should totally give me pity likes. I deserve them.

you can shout out the command ‘Siri, factory reset’ at a Tesla and it’ll fuckin’ kill itself, dude

Me: Not sure I can keep going times are tough for real *eats lunch* Me: Being alive is its own reward, drawing breath such a beautiful privilege

shocked to discover they’re still making guys named trevor

I'm a top tier poster trapped in a man's body

The right has never had enough talent to create good art and media on their own. It's why they think AI is a godsend. It does what their destructive brains simply cannot do. It creates. It's shit, but they're too unimaginative to know that. It's their Fool's gold.

RFK Jr.: ‘The President Having Sex With Children Is Fine From A Purely Nutritional Standpoint’

Anyone else have days where they get on here and have to immediately get off because the discourse is awful?

Panic at the Costco

That Bill Clinton truly is charming