Shoutout everyone who gave me a Christmas card. Next time can you draw me a freaky little dude on it? Pls and thank

There are so many people who like receiving mail but only the few who enjoy sending mail. I keep this society running

Biblically accurate hot dog

Artists are so important. What if I need a drawing of a cartoon version of my friend eating a hot dog in 2 days time

suited up (as the grinch)

For MLK day I’m going to Olympia to discuss why social housing is important to me with my legislators. Join me! secure.ngpvan.com/JzOty9-eREOZ...

I checked Mr. Big into the toddler playland at IKEA

My endless void is larger than your endless void

Im storing all my data in the void between the couch and the wall

Me and the cousins are going to go scream into the void in-between lunch and present opening this Christmas

You can’t straighten out her whiskers we have tried

When they daylight the Talaris creek we are going to name the returning salmon and we will create cringe fanfiction for them

A lot of men genuinely believe themselves to be in a secret club where they speak and act completely differently around women, they think everyone is doing it and it's normal. Then they start resenting us because it is stressful to do that every day. It's good to be mean about it

hiring an uber driver to tail my other uber driver

For Christmas I took two guinea pigs to the emergency vet and then they were actually fine

burying you upside down and bonking your feet with a shovel

People keep telling me to get back on the dating apps and I will not be doing that

grandpa tell us a christmas story about the war tell us about what artillery can do to a mans body

The hottest and most whimsical women I know are trans. And I’m sending them postcards.

i tried using bluesky and it sucks and i kept using it

I’m taking all your kidney stones and putting them in a tiny jar next to the cookie jar so you are reminded of your choices

I gotta get back into poetry as a big old fuck you to AI

I had suicidal thoughts back in 2018 but man look at this amazing photo I once took then

If you know me from twitter and you remember the story about the guy I lost my virginity to you’ll love this old screenshot I found

@breetash.bsky.social we literally can’t get into makeup it’s so expensive. I’ve decided to cut off my eye lashes next time instead of getting more products

Baristas are kinda weird. They keep asking me weird questions. Watch this be another instance where I don’t realize they’re flirting with me

She is disrespecting Glenn Close by not paying attention

I’ll pay you $2 to wear a monocle to the gym for a straight week

Big dark is great for headlamp sales

youtu.be/7Xue-dOOLiY?... Whenever this comes on the radio I’m blasting it.

Was talking to my friend who hunts mushrooms about the Talaris site and they said they’ve been foaming at the mouth for months thinking about all the mushrooms festering behind that chain link fence

If Fremont Bridge was car free we could have the Solstice Parade on it.

I should start carrying around 10 bouncy balls in my pocket at all times and if someone tries to talk to me I chuck them at them and run

YESSSS. GUY ON THE TREADMILL AT THE GYM WATCHING YU-GI-OH

Coworker said “I love the skarssgard family I thank the father for the beautiful family every day.” And I said “girl what about the mom who gave birth like 10 times by now???.” Women are deleted from society left and right???

The amount of men I hear saying “I’ll just CHATgbt it.”

New movies make me so angry. They’re promoting thinness so aggressively it ruins whatever storytelling they were trying to do every single time.

Looking through old photos today. I truly never changed

New Guinea pig who dis

A good quarter of the people in my life have no idea I do architecture and I love that

They won't let me have a pair of scissors they said it's illegal

only 2 days late this time ☺️

“I know it's high in 6PPD-quinone, but who doesn’t overeat things that are technically literally poison when they’re back home for the holidays?” said the salmon as he dove face-first into waterfall of polluted stormwater.

Hey can anyone give me their Apple account I wanna watch Pluribus

God I need to learn how to draw so I can make a comic that's just this dude taking off a hat that says "yaoi" when he's watching the final credits of Heated Rivalry and replaced it with a hat that says "yuri" and it shows he's changed the channel to the beginning of Pluribus

the devil works hard but Heated Rivalry editors work harder

Also found at the Thrift Store, in the CD section, whatever this is. My curiosity was worth the $1.99 to rescue this, if even the Richie Ashburn thing *alone* proves to be on here. I will let you know.

I hate gay Seattle Halloween. What do you mean you’re the Condiment Cow from Remlinger farms?

Clouds just do that it’s crazy

love the unexplained duck