if i’m posting, and you’re posting, then who is driving the bus

apple intelligence is SICK of drumpf’s b*llshit

i’m looking for a drug or potion of some sort that will turn me into a nonfeeling automaton focused on production optimized for the capitalist system

i do. shower me with love & attention, please

in the future you will hook your Neuralink up to the AT Protocol and post with your mind. it will automatically post your thoughts. you will be able to ingest the global firehose of everyone else’s thoughts. we will reach a mind collective not unlike the Borg, birthed from the Bluesky

i’m sorry for making enemies on here i’m just so catty and i live for drama

He was a Communist, Elmo.

going viral increases the chances of finding my wife please gas this for the sake of love

bluesky is a machine. and the machine needs blood

i’d like to be put into a rock tumbler and polished

if this is true, why am i not seeing a 40% rise in follower rates? this feels like an outrage and more suppression of my account by bsky.app

sometimes i wish i knew what you guys were talking about

I’m not that worried about the economy because all my money is FDIC insured

milk with fascistic characteristics. vegans win again

i wish there were still reputable doctors offering lobotomy services

it's called blue sky because we're all in hell. wait that doesnt sound right

i think someone should put me in a pan with some chopped onion celery and carrot and deglaze the pan with red cooking wine once we get all sweaty and smelly and translucent

can we stop saying this? it’s obviously worse. we’re obviously at toddler scale cognition now

some of your posts are so inspiring

good morning to my 17,292 beautiful children. i love you all

*many* of them were *hopefully* terrorists *we hope*

"i saw a bad post on x" ok well i saw a turd in the toilet but i'm not making you look at a screenshot of it

whenever somebody says “let that sink in” my brain immediately conjures the image of that oaf

is this following list some kind of intimidation tactic

i need to be thrown into a centrifuge

or, hear me out, we could just engineer the babies to breath tear gas

i would like to be competent one day

i wish i had a neuralink so i could make it zap me whenever i have an opinion :/

i mainly post to make enemies

im tired of tyrannical public benefit corporations

im tired of tyrannical public benefit corporations

now cashtags are funny

$respectingwomen

computer. fix my life

me and all the uncs been sayin

it's such an awful time to be chopped and unc

maybe donald trump will solve the housing crisis by giving us all an igloo in greenland

@josh.uno is a dummy

i don’t think some of you consider how your posts hurt my feelings

it’s so cool how you can just say anything online

i feel like we are spiraling towards a future where the united states ends up taking over greenland starting an international land grab that ends up with china taking over the entire moon

everyone’s so mad. let’s all be happy instead

we’ve tried nothing and we’re all out of ideas

i do wish someone would throw me out with the bath water

someone sent me a copy of the bsky employee handbook. I KNEW IT

i’m so tired of seeing things that simultaneously make me cry and sick to my stomach

i would like to be flattened by a steamroller

One thing that would definitely work to increase the birth rate is decreasing the length of pregnancy. 9 women could work together in a team to produce a baby in one month

@pfrazee.com can we get a statement on the Tenor GIF situation? people are scared, crying, afraid of a bluesky without GIFs