i cant keep up with movie opinions. everyone is wrong but me

it sucks when the newspaper does some new comic. I don't recognize any of those characters. None of them seem famous to me. I'm scared and I don't know where I am. No wonder nobody reads

the bar for "basic hygiene" is always right out of reach for you specifically. you always need 1 more shower than you have. you need to brush your teeth 1 more time a day. you need to use 1 more cleanser on your face. everyone else does this without issue btw

THIS IS NOT A GOOD SIGN AR poetry project by J. R. Carpenter & Tomo Kihara not-a-good-sign.com @jrcarpenter.bsky.social #notagoodsign @banffcentre.bsky.social @derekbeaulieu.bsky.social

Your teenage years are all about learning who you are as a person. Your 20s are for taking risks and making mistakes. Your 30s are for being stuck in a time loop. Your 40s are for being stuck in a time loop. Your 50s are for being stuck in a time loop.

GARFIELD: CAUGHT IN THE ACT SEGA INTERACTIVE DEV DIV 1995 SEGA GENESIS

if your thoughts are too pure your brain will grow invincible bacteria

YOU CAN'T FOOL OTHERS IF YOU'RE FOOLING YOURSELF

(scrolling Bluesky) I reject the premise. I reject the premise. Granted. I reject the premise. Not my fetish. Granted. I reject the premise. Funny. I reject the premise.

ok i'll bite. whats "chocolate"

Heavy is the hand that weighs a lot

ALERT: New Domino Club Jam Released Claims To ANSWER ALL QUESTIONS TO REALITY TO FIND OUT MORE AND PLAY PERVERSE GAMES CHECK OUT domino.gallery/jams/questio...

After all that fracas I am genuinely wondering

would love to meet the first person who ever chilled

i am out of everyone's league

i need weird shit to please me

fuck now i want to play shadows of doubt again

good morning, sunday morning the bibble says dont always be trying to get pissed about things, also dont whine about nostalgia, truly a verse for posters

had a great weekend at music festival. i got to see poison girl friend live!!! youtu.be/qTNpgQ1BmiY?...

the bar for "basic hygiene" is always right out of reach for you specifically. you always need 1 more shower than you have. you need to brush your teeth 1 more time a day. you need to use 1 more cleanser on your face. everyone else does this without issue btw

I need to become nicer to myself and meaner to everyone else

breed me like one of your french dogs

need a stable of various dads in rotation

they should make a cheestring for busy uncles

romantic love is basically an accident i think

goodbye baby yoda. you gave us a lot of laughs

The notion of "male socialization" is inherently transphobic. It is no more worthy of discussion or consideration than any other TERF talking point. You did not find a way to successfully hide your transphobia in progressive clothing.

need a fat guy to let me motorboat his huge cans

Getting closer

(Gomer Pyle voice) We live inside a dream, sarge!

There is literally a cabbage for every purpose under heaven my friends

remember when they played homestuck music for the pope

having fun goes crazy

the new james bond should have a 2.5 inch dick. just a regular, chill dude with an above average size. not crazy, but more than enough to please any woman he saves. trust me, it’s enough. more than enough.

top 10 emotional skeets

guy who has man privelege: trans women are bad because they act like they have man privelege

it's disgusting that you don't let Obelix have any potion. he was deformed due to your villages lax childcare system and you punish him for your sins

that post was funny but then i remembered freakonomics and it was like a jump scare

i'm going to be the first fat james bond

i just heard about your uncle i’m so sorry. may i ask how he became chopped?

in the 2000s people believed you could use economics to make an apple grow like an orange inside. that's real. Anyway I've been kicked out of yet another farming village for my cowboy ways and must reach a church before sundown. The things that hunt me in the night cannot touch holy ground

Wow, this human person has some really amazing qualities

Let us dance over the infinite chasm between us

i wanna have so much fun

Dress for the job you want

accounts that don’t make text posts