i hate that every cloud service is constantly sending me marketing emails saying "You've used up 97% of your space!" like yeah dude i know i've done a perfect job managing my usage. i have split the G on your free service. i deserve an award

This shit so real, remember when I said Lawnmower Man was a 5/5? I mean, it is, but that's still pretty fucked up

Hold up

People be like 'nooooo Metroidvania doesn't adequately explain the genre,' while cinema gets to have giallo and music gets pigfuck

It's insane that Wario's Gold Mine is in the Flower Cup. It's definitely a Star Cup-coded track

In Super Mario Galaxy, the stars on the letters of the logo spell "u r mr gay", while for the movie it says "he mr gay". This is because you are watching Mario, not playing him.

This game is sick because one of the first things you gotta do is chloroform Victor or he'll 1v1 your ass and beat you down with a reverse flying jump kick from across the screen

Man shaking and sweating, nervously refreshing his Gamestop Reddit feed, praying for the 'Funko Bankruptcy and Why This is Good for the Stock' 300-page essay to show up on the front page, assuaging his fears for one more day

This is Uni's strongest punch! :3

Are there any jobs that require dowsing rods still? I feel like I'd be really good at walking around and bullshitting.

playing the re4 remake and the little guy not having a napoleon hat is pissing me off

Still need more baseball? We found a CD in our archives containing dozens of unused voice lines from MLB Slugfest 20-03 rejected by the MLB. Here's some of our favorites.

Evil Tetris

New favorite way to not explain my art just dropped.

Yea i know prime is coming out soon, I know its irrelevant to post now. FZero fans will stay suffering

This dovetails into my thoughts every time the 'video games should be $100' discourse comes up. Video games in the 80s did not have a lot of competition. My ass is never going to pay $100+, especially for AI sludge, when I have 2k+ Steam games, 100-some physical, 100s of roms and a 600 game wishlist

losing it

Gorillas can only smoke the good cigars

Oh, it's PS2 North America's launch anniversary

Picking blue solely to kill Sonic the Hedgehog in the womb

343 adding story and missions to Halo 1 is very upsetting because so far all of the story and missions they have added to the Halo franchise have been ass garbage, and Halo 1 is a good video game

FOV slider in a console game, I am going to kiss Sakurai on the mouth (if he wants)

(Reading the 2026 Revised Version of Good Night Moon to my newborn son named Pingas) Good night DINNER, good night PLUMS Good night LAMP OIL, good night BOMBS

Time to vote in what most people would probably consider the most important mayoral election happening in the near future, the Edmonton one. All my homes hate Tim Cartmell

Receiving analingus from a mogwai at 1:00am to test a hypothesis

*killer instinct announcer voice* BUTCHER! BAKER! C-C-C-CANDLESTICKMAKER!

Imagining Jack Frost, Pikachu, and Agumon having a conversation

(free ep) www.patreon.com/posts/141170... Haven't posted about it every time, but the discussion of Outlaw Star with @skeletonhousebrett.bsky.social continues!

I'm pulling tricks with my Sega Genesis that would make Hiroshi Yamauchi rise from the fucking grave just to shit himself

Fuckin' pissed my date of birth landed me directly inbetween the 'socially acceptable to have a mustache' age brackets

it's not FOR us

I can tell I've become an Ascended Gamer because I'm currently playing a game with analog movement and yearning for tank controls Related, Fatal Frame 1 great game

I could use $60 to almost buy 2 months of Game Pass, or I could use it to buy a Maybe Working Atari 2600 and Combat cart I think you know the path that reality lies beyond

Damn Microsoft really just wants to get out of this 'video games' thing huh

thirty dollars a month for a monthly pass to play video games is insane. it costs $7 to buy slay the spire on PC, another $7 to buy it on your phone, and maybe another $7 for a hypothetical third device. that's your gaming budget set until slay the spire 2 comes out

Turns out I already own a Gamecube controller adapter and some third party GCN controller with the absolute best calibrated analog stick I've ever seen, we stay winning

I don't think this is the funniest possible 'exhaustive list of games that are art,' but it is very close.

Kinda feels performative when I'm like 'alright, not gonna buy anything from that gigantic publisher anymore,' but my gaming diet is already 49.5% emulated 30-year old games that never made it out of Japan and 49.5% indies made by one guy in an RV in the Nevada desert

Third-person cinematic action game where you play a white human being slowly shimmying along a ledge before shooting something with a bow and arrow enjoyers boutta pop the frick off

Every time I see this youtuber in the wild I think about the lore of how he was an Intellivision Amico kool-aid salesman before pivoting to the right-wing culture warrior grift, and I think that's a hilarious pipeline

We as a society need to invent a new hawk tuah-esque meme, where it has the ironic superposition of becoming more funny the less funny it becomes