would anyone like to nominate me for a job

Instead of the Nuzzi shit, let's focus on the fact that apparently Johnny Knoxville got married this past weekend, the wedding was officiated by John Waters, and a dog was involved

my dad always used to tell me i could do anything i want to but unfortunately failed to consider that i do not want to do anything

losing my mind over youtube's suggested reply for this comment

bro there's a whole paragraph about his brain worm lmfao

beginning to think the bubble isn't going to pop and we see ed zitron go bath salts mode

i found this quite moving www.theguardian.com/football/202...

youre asking chatgpt. im asking my discord full of autistic people that i keep in my back pocket. we are not the same.

just remembered

btw if you haven#t played ffxiv in a while and you need some HDD space then check the "[ffxiv]\game" folder because it does not delete that shit when you uninstalled and it's like 140GB

unemployment be like "huh i'm running out of clean underwear i thought i did that a couple days ago" and then you check your spreadsheet and it's been over two weeks

looked at linkedin briefly. none of these people are real

i can only select one option here. what the fuck do you want from me

poker face is a very silly collection of tv episodes and i'm having a good time. i rarely do not have a good time when natasha lyonne is on screen

so is the new pokemon battle system just "mash your skills whenever they come off cooldown"

Dubai is like if you made Westfield a city-state

if you pay 70 dollars for a call of duty game in 2025 you're a fucking idiot, AI-slop or no. i am a fucking idiot but for different reasons

something compelled me to pick up Ace Combat 4 (i've never played one since the AC3 demo on PS2 like 20 years ago) and the debrief screen showing your arrow looping and corkscrewing is so sick

every video game should have an accessible dev console. controllers should have a dedicated button and pop out keyboards.

the catholic church is evil

i’m gonna just watch this at least once a day and i recommend everyone do the same

The difference in time between now and I can has cheezburger Is the same between I can has Cheezburger and the Berlin Wall falling

[To the tune of Pretty Woman by Roy Orbison] 🎵Baba Yaga 🎵Walking down the street 🎵Baba Yaga 🎵House with chicken feet 🎵Baba Yaga

happy Partially Muscled Skeleton Stands by the Perimeter Fence and Screams for Thirty Seconds Before Vanishing day

This is the funniest possible image to be an alt text scold about

are you based in south london. please pay me to do tasks for you.

never logging off this torment nexus

@yuriandrogynopov.bsky.social joyeux androgynopoversaire!!!!

I truly believe that Wes Streeting has the ideas, the charisma, and the likeability to be an even more historically hated Prime Minister than Keir Starmer

From: Larry Summers Subject: Thought Women, pah! Such low minded cattle, like cows to me. Not yet of the eshalone of a peak male brain. Thinkst you so, Jeffrey? From: Jeffrey Epstein Subject: ❗ Re: Thought impotant pattern . i just remebrered all the letters . a b b c e g f i p l m n s t u xv z .

As of this morning, Starbucks workers across the country are officially ON STRIKE. And we're prepared for this to become the biggest and longest ULP strike in Starbucks history. Say #NoContractNoCoffee with us: DON'T BUY STARBUCKS for the duration of our open-ended ULP strike! $SBUX

terminallevy.net/entries/simp... new entry! by @westernstyle.live, about 4X-lites and exercises in simplifying complex genres.

sudden urge to play calls of duty 1+2. i simply wish to shoot an m1 garand

please picture in your mind how wide a tennis court could possibly be. nope wrong

decided to try and win the world cup with china in fm 24

IT'S '6-7', COOPER. A GENERATION ALPHA TREND. WHAT THEY CALL A 'MAY-MAY'. IT'S AN ORPHANED SIGNIFIER, NO SIGNS ATTACHED. ONE COULD CALL IT DADAIST, BUT SOMME SAY IT'S TOO STUPID TO BE DADA. IT'S ANTI-MEANING, ANTI-HUMOUR, BUT DAMN IF THOSE KIDS DON'T FIND IT A CRACK-UP.

today at the dog park neighboring the public tennis courts I witnessed a dude putting a battery operated ball launcher inside his suv accidentally hit some sort of button on it, which caused the machine to start firing tennis balls inside of the vehicle, which ended up giving him a black eye

I’ve seen a few folks go for the “if you simply must watch that new Harry Potter show just pirate it” and sorry. No. Just no. Just don’t watch it. At all. Ever. Break free of it. It’s time. You’ll be ok. I promise. I know it mattered to you as a kid. Find new things, it’s healthier. Just move on.

am i stupid or is there no way to access the artist page from their album on the bandcamp app

Many conclusions are being lept to and snap judgments made the last 24 hours or so, but it would behoove all weighing in to remember that Wes Streeting is simply a cunt

given all the languages of the world, i know almost every one of the 26^4 four-letter combinations likely exist as a name. however,

history will ultimately decide this but i think joyce carol oates might have just landed the most devastating burn in human history. like the death star trench run of posting