This is structurally identical to a Da Share Z0ne post

the pope is not woke. american conservative christianity has spent the last few decades mutating into an evil doppelgänger of itself such that any conservative christian leader who says things like “it’s wrong to incinerate schoolchildren” scans as a titan of superhuman moral fiber.

Me, an atheist: Your holiness I stand ready to join the crusade against these heretics

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If i learned anything in Geometry it's that everything in this world is either a triangle or a circle

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🕯 🕯 🕯 🕯 🕯 🕯 it 🕯 🕯 🕯 🕯 🕯 🕯

this would be an amazing way for It to happen

Amazon Facilities in Bahrain Hit Again as Iran Follows Through on Threat, Report Says

objectively the funniest critique an american could level at another country

pouring beers for empty seats at a bar of the people who insist that generative ai is the future

This episode was great, now it's worse #TheAmazingDigitalCircus #tadc #ytp

Every now and then I remember that British Bake Off episode where they made them cook Mexican food without knowing anything about it and one of them pronounced guacamole as "glockymolo". I'm haunted by the glockymolo

my extremely based and chunguspilled oaf of a spawn Burzum Pewdiepie Musk went to the same mcdonalds four times in one day and ordered 372 small root beers and nothing else. It was the most epic bacon meme of all time

Never serve sushi or water to me or my large adult son, Totenkopf ever again

ME: (chastising myself) Careful. We can't just paint every billionaire as an evil NPC with no inner life. They're just people, and we need to understand that if we're ever going to improve society BILLIONAIRE: I'm an empty shell, man. No thoughts up here. I'm essentially a void made to suck up money

Check this shit out motherfucker I’m going to make America great again [I commit family annihilation but for the whole nation, its not clear what kind of move I was trying to do]

there's a thing I like to call "load-bearing assumptions", that you don't notice until they're suddenly gone (e.g the air you breath has oxygen in it). the post-ww2 order is a load-bearing assumption for basically the entirety of american life. trump took a sledgehammer to it in the last 90 days.

Does someone want to tell me why it takes the courts a week to send a letter five miles?

After 9 yeareals, it's finally my turn to post the "a thousand cereals" clip, seeing as how I'm the idiot who made it.

Whoever is working the playlist that plays in grocery stores, don't think I didn't catch you slipping "Fortunate Son" in there today

average person cheering for war in iran

you guys just don't get it if israel and america don't rain death upon schoolchildren they'd be really sad

From The Archives:

"thin places" are locations where the veil between the physical and spiritual worlds is said to be particularly thin.

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Come, Sir Andrew, there’s no remedy

CEOs Never Cum

Sweethearts sure have changed since I used to get them in school

Fucking lobotomize me

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I'd love to visit your Island it sounds so le epic bacon sauce sir

Hi. Not only is tomorrow Bandcamp Friday, but it also happens to be Gefälschtemusik Day, when Basal Metabolism's fake German disco album is set off into the world at large. Miss out or don't! basalmetabolism.bandcamp.com/album/gef-ls...

anti-bazinga

random Yale law professor: jeffrey you naughty dog.... will i be seeing you at this year's Skull Size Forum or will you be busy with your hobbies ;) JE: we must invent trans phobia,,

we're being ruled by a dying pedophile with dementia because another pedophile collected all the scientists and nazis he could into one big network and then died, leaving them rudderless

I have never been more stressed, paranoid, and terrified of the future than I currently am.

I will say that it does feel a bit frivolous to go through these rounds when things are so invariably the way they are right now, but the best I can hope for is that this bit of frivolity can go a long way in bringing joy to people. Fuck La Migra, Twin Cities Forever. We Are Hope Despite The Times

There are some very very small things happening in the world of Basal Metabolism soon. Minuscule things. Check back next month.

Holy Fourth Amendment, Batman!

we have won the horse girls. repeat: we have won the horse girls

Thinking about Frank the cow today who graced the A-side label of Mayhem's debut EP and thus the first official release in Norwegian black metal canon

the utdr origin story is so funny to me i think about it all the time. who the fuck has a prophetic vision about a video game they will make one day, tries to make said video game, sucks shit, decides to make a less intense game to get practice, then makes fucking undertale

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