ICYMI: We covered Nope last week and @elliew920.bsky.social came super prepared

It's Nope Day on @totalmassacre.bsky.social! I was so excited to rejoin the squad to talk about one of my favorite movies. Listen now to hear my thoughts on chimps, plushie aliens, Cactus icees, theme parks that inspired Jupiter's Claim, Fry's Electronics (RIP), and of course, Steven Yeun!

ⓘThis user should have been a pair of ragged claws Scuttling across the floors of silent seas.

To me, the conclusive proof that there is no god is the fact that raccoons look like that and clearly should be my friends but they will give me rabies

for sale: short story, six words

"Yes I approve the draft of this PDF, send it to the printers"

if you were made prisoner by an eerie gentleman in a far away land, and you had to write a letter to your betrothed telling her that all was well, how would you subtly let her know that you were imperiled

Preparing for tomorrow when Joe Biden tries to use 5G to steal my penis

Literally me, unemployed and observing my neighbors' crimes through my window all day.

used book three dollars

I'm back on Talking Trek to You to discuss the most important Star Trek twist of all time: Spock is horny! Will wrestling his hot best friend in the sand fix this situation? Tune in to find out!!

Nobody talks about how silly it is that Merry and Pippin went to a party in a foreign country, told the locals hey let us sing you a song from our culture, and then just performed literally a commercial.

he said he was a "vulcanologist" but he didn't even know what Pon Farr was 🙄

it's good, we need the earthquakes

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everyone loves pushing down these little buttons, but no one uses them to differentiate beverages. They should just label them with four celebs and you can push down which one you think is hottest, or four mental illnesses and you can say which one you think you have

why does this exist

this is how I look at varmints who need to vamoose

for sale: baby socks, also never worn (same baby)

This place would probably be less boring if it didn't take so gd long to get an invite code, let me bring more of my friends please

I have been angry since 2017 that they never brought this back. I complain about it every single year.

Ronald Reagan died 6969 days ago today. 1 reskeet is 1 piss on his grave

I support our troops and I hope the Nazi monkey from Raiders of The Lost Ark is burning in hell

first bluesky post, look at this cat I met!