Wishing you an early happy new year. I'm off to explore Alaska and the Arctic Circle and will be taking an offline break for a while. Sending you love and good vibes 🖤✨️

decade - 10 years century - 100 years millennium - 1000 years together forever - 5 months

be careful what you wish for

They eat a cold carb They eat a hot carb They eat a cheesy carb They eat a chocolate carb They eat a carb that remind them of the good times They eat a carb that reminds them of the best times

Spaghetti is straight until it gets hot and wet.

The only difference between a straight woman and a bisexual woman is three drinks.

Girl are you Christmas dinner leftovers? Cuz I'm already sick of you.

boarding group F crew. where my final fuckers at

I wanna pet that dog so bad!!! 🥰🥰 such a good boy.

Can't wait to find out which illness my family gave me for Xmas

them: “you have my sword, and my bow, and my axe” me: and my fingers 😏

at my gate, waiting for my flight to go explore Alaska and the Arctic Circle and "What a Wonderful World" starts playing on the speaker. life is short my friends. we are here for a brief time, get out and explore this beautiful and magical world, and grow your heart and mind ✨️

never forget who was there for you at your lowest

somewhere today, there's a mother yelling, "I'll send all this shit back!"

the world needs your softness, your kindness, your giving spirit. I know it's hard when it isn't reciprocated, and you feel like giving up. just keep going, you wouldn't be you without that beautiful soul that gives hope even when it's hard.

look, I'm a hooman

idk what the other place has trending, but this... this proves that we are in the good place

I love learning about various human societies' legends and beliefs surrounding the Milky Way. Recently I learned about some Australian Aboriginal people who believed the galaxy was a river that souls crossed in a canoe, and the stars were their campfires along the river. Beautiful.

Our “almost” will always haunt me.

Sometimes something surprises you. You never know what carries weight. For example, you might get your ex a silly, impulse buy, like a Lite Brite set you see as you’re shopping. She’ll like that. And it’s the toy she never got as a kid, then watched her sister get. & you almost make her smile-cry.

9: I love you, dad. Do you know what my favorite part of today was? Me: What’s that? 9: Seeing your eyes light up when you opened my present. 🥹🥹🥹

I’m a love letter in a text message world.

@cruisinsoozan.bsky.social wish I could've brought you some pancakes today! sending you love 🖤

nothing says merry chrismukkah like a federal student loan email thanking me for my payment 🥹

I feel seen 🥹🥹🥹🥹

I hope you get the potato you wished for this year. Happy holidays 🖤

gave my fur baby assless chaps for xmas 😂

Whatever you do, don’t give your heart away for Christmas. This one dude never got his back and won’t shut up about it.

Your body knows. Your nervous system will naturally feel at peace around people with pure intentions and beautiful hearts – trust it.

snowflakes are winter's butterflies fluttering around a snowglobe 🤍

🗣️🗣️ 🎶 Oh Cum All Ye Faithful, Solo or By Humping..” 🎶

*clears throat* I shall now perform “Little Cummer Boy” 💦🍑🥁 ~ “Cum she told me, pa rum pum pum pum Shall I cum for you, pa rum pum pum pum, On your bum?…” Thank you

sunset and tacos; a perfect xmas eve eve ❤️🧡

The Dating Pool: ◽️ Happily Married, but "just looking" ◽️ Unhappily Married ◽️ Engaged, no date set ◽️ In an unhappy relationship ◽️ In a situationship ◽️ In a few situationships and greedy ◽️ Poly, Open ◽️ Divorced, wants casual ◽️ Just got out of something ◽️ Just got into something ◽️ Completely given up

is everyone having fun at fake work today?

I promise you, no friendship, relationship, or situationship is worth messing up your mental health over. Period.

no one gaslights you harder than a leasing office trying to make the frozen pipes in your apartment your own fault

Happy Christmas Eve Eve

Sometimes a good hug is all I need to change my perspective.

Have you ever noticed that a person who has nothing, will help you faster than a person who has everything.

oopsie, left out the wrong cookies

as a kid, sleep is often viewed as a punishment to them. as an adult, it's a gift.

If i seem over-the-top about sex & body positivity please understand i spent the first half of my life consumed by an eating disorder that almost killed me. I had no mother to help guide or teach me to ignore artificial beauty standards & have a healthy self-confidence myself. This is me, winning.😊

Confess your unbridled love to me in a candlelit library in Vienna during a full moon on a cold winter’s night before passionately kissing me, or kindly stop wasting my time.

tonight, I brought my daughter to her dad's for the week. she told me she left me a note outside 😭

Men, it's dangerous out there. Know how to protect yourself.

getting a jump start on 2025

therapist: and what do we do when he starts pulling away? me: take a lock of his hair and do a black magic love spell? therapist: no.

I like my men like I like my coffee... roasted, ground up and bagged in the freezer

me: did you guys hear about the actress that got stabbed? Reese. them: Witherspoon? me: no, with a knife.