Gosford Park (2001) Gosford World (2015) Gosford World: Fallen Kingdom (2018)

moving back into my parents’ biome

a trapezoid-shaped toilet, a crapezoid

after about a block and a half you realize laughing all the way to the bank is gonna suck

hittin the buffet in full ceremonial garb

it’s so embarrassing to be driving next to the same model/color of car

i’m buying a haircut today

imagining a guy trying to make dinner with a leaf blower

I know it's not butter. I just can't 𝙥𝙧𝙤𝙫𝙚 it.

I have developed the world's first hover car, after months of tireless effort

this new tape i bought is PERFECT for ducts

supper tiiiime and the eating is eeeaasyyy

don’t pick your nose when you’re riding an ebike please

he wants it, he wants the Precious 😤

This came to me in a dream

why do nerds suddenly appear every time I post here

Love the glimpse into the beautiful mind that notated this used copy of Moby Dick I got

i have a special drawer for my hair dryer

if i ever have to land a plane, i’m gonna try to ‘set her down easy’ - that’s a promise

euphemism for masturbation: ‘at a VERY poorly attended orgy’

Whoa-oh We're halfway there WHOA-OH

They need to invent a small cow for the home

thanks to AI video I basically don't believe in any unlikely animal friends I haven't already seen. do you know what that's done to my sense of whimsy

i love when something is to my liking

come to me, dental plan

Taking pictures of all the groceries at the grocery store to show to my kids.

i had $20 to my name and could only say ‘toilet doll’…but i was young and in paris!

it’s funny to read those stickers on semi trucks as ‘how am i DRIVING?!’ - like the driver’s on a lot of acid and can’t believe they’re even capable, let alone on the freeway in an 18-wheeler

Went to the doctor today with a list of demands

why yes, i am a writer... have i written anything you've heard of? well, i don't know... perhaps you've HEARD of a little tome called THE BIBLE 2

any baking dish should have its dimensions right there ON the dish! what am i supposed to carry a ruler around everywhere?!

i think we're about 2 years out from england putting jack the ripper on their money

when you hear that lilting oboe leitmotif im comin playa

thinking about a guy at the beach who gets a little mixed-up & tries to poop on someone’s jellyfish sting :)

reverse vampire gives victims occasionally life-saving blood transfusions

yesterday i saw a guy jogging with a big ziploc bag of ice cubes - probably in a hurry to get home before they melted

I named my fists Judy and the Dream of Horses.

sometimes if you’re very, very tired, it’s ok not to brush your teeth before bed - please, do not abuse this privilege

[jousting commentator]: he hath that Hound within him

having a CT scan this afternoon, and just wondering: during the test, will the tech be able to see my underwear?

i could really go for a big glass of popcorn butter

easy to love - just like me

people love to eat groceries!!!

I shouldn't be in trouble. They shouldn't get to call them "Temptations" if they don't want me to eat the cat treats.

i love it when something that isn’t mine becomes mine ❤️

pronouncing bible like nibble

awoke as a damn dracula

spiderland: great album, terrible place to live

Computer Science Lewis

is there a downside to having an attic? i sure don’t see one