Tylenol causes autism, the Rapture is on Tuesday, Trump cares about other people... MAGA will believe anything except facts, reality, science, and women.

So cool they discovered the cause of autism on basically day they guessed they would. I’m also glad they are withholding this information for a few days to prep for a WrestleMania-style announcement. This is how science works.

Do you ever just get sad about how many people have fully embraced anti-intellectualism?

Literally the only good thing about taking a road trip with two kids is the fact that I don't have three kids

fantastic foreskins

“Irony” is defined as parents of small children celebrating something called Independence Day

I regret to inform you that due to entirely foreseen circumstances that literally everyone warned me about, I have officially graduated from desperately wanting my son to leave me alone for five minutes to desperately wanting my son to hang out with me for five minutes

Every summer morning, my kid runs into the bedroom and excitedly asks, "what's the plan today?" Bro, if I were the kind of person who made plans, you'd be hours away at sleepaway camp and l'd still be asleep. I've failed us both.

Can’t wait for my teenager to finish exams so we can move on to his summer school courses: Laundry 101, How to Properly Close a Bag of Chips, Hygiene in the Time of Puberty, and Sibling Conflict Resolution

Called my dad to wish him a Happy Father's Day and we spent the whole time discussing back pain and ibuprofen. The circle is now complete.

Went to the doctor for some lower back pain and he diagnosed me with being my age

“What is stopping the Christians-in-name-only, who’ve spent their lives proclaiming the good news and asking others what Jesus would do, from fighting for the values they supposedly hold most dear?” READ AND SUBSCRIBE!

The cruelty in today's politics feels horribly corrosive. Bringing up that hard-working immigrant families — undocumented, yes, but not violent criminals — are being ripped apart based on immigration status doesn't bring compassion or even pause, but gleeful cheers.

"Bluesky sucks" says the corporation trying to get you to go back to the Hellsite owned by a weirdly moist, self-declared 53 year old "meme lord" who lies about being good at video games & wants to DM slide your girlfriend to ask her have his 1127th secret baby because "it would be so epic lmao"

New euphemism for authoritarian lawlessness just dropped

Descartes: I think therefore I am Me, who hasn’t had a thought since 2003: you do what

I got "weed whacking" and "whacking off" confused and now my landscaper offered to work for free.

Calvin & Hobbes is widely regarded as one of the greatest comic strips of all time and I feel like we STILL underrate it.

you show signs of wanting to change the party for the better and they oust you, this party has learned absolutely nothing from 2016, from 2020, and from 2024 and never will

Reminder that I AM LATINA AND PROUD. I am the product of immigration - my grandmother was undocumented and entered the country from Mexico as a baby. My mother was a fierce, gorgeous Latina woman of Mexican and Spanish descent.

"What if we just repeat everything Republicans say whether it is a lie or not? Maybe then they will love us?" - the media

It’s fun when we’re all depressed about the same things, yes?

Sometimes the frogs do notice when the water gets hotter.

The disparity btwn what’s actually happening in Los Angeles and the way it’s being mischaracterized is one of the biggest stress tests of modern media in recent memory. Botted socials, AI, old clips, declining literacy—it’s like seeing a broken emergency response system hit by a storm.

The idea that the progressive left used the internet to bully institutions into accepting unpopular, far-left positions is the exact opposite of what has actually happened. The alt-right used the internet for ideological capture and they are now in the White House bragging about it daily

dude this party is such an echo chamber. it's just friends hanging out and chilling and having a good time. you need to invite some people over who want to kill you with hammers

*studying for science test* 14yo: I can’t remember it all! There’s too much! *seventeen minutes later* 14yo: *recites long, complex history of fictional video game universe with word-for-word accuracy*

“Months ago, in the aftermath of their hero insulting a minister, I asked where the breaking point might be for the MAGA contingent. But the question isn’t where the breaking point is, it’s why isn’t there one?” READ AND SUBSCRIBE!

Once you hit a certain age, waking up without a hangover can be just as satisfying as getting drunk

I'm just glad one of these men has the nuclear codes and the other has all our personal data.

this is a day for those of us who have spent the last six months terminally online. this is for us and honestly, we deserve it.

Okay I know you all are watching some sort of train crash, BUT our 4-yo just marched into the room and said “You know what? I LOVE BOOKS. I love books more than probably anyone.”

Over on Twitter is a PANOPLY of cringeposting from bluechecks who have reverted into children pleading for mommy and daddy not to break up and speaking in daytime television talk show language

This is Opie. He was raised by cats. Picked up a few habits he just can't shake. But it turns out loafing is super comfy, actually. 13/10

we’ve earned this

If you’re not enjoying the worst people in the world tearing each other apart? How sad for you.

*5:30 in the morning* 9yo: (standing outside wide awake) I like hearing the birds sing! Me: (mainlining caffeine) I’m gonna need a paternity test.

We only rate dogs. This is Chewbacca having a spa day. He's trying to relax. Please give him some privacy. 13/10

If you had important information for voters, and kept it to yourself to sell books after it was too late, you’re not a hero. You’re an asshole.

I’m in a public library. Numerous adults are helping kids on summer break. Some kids look brilliant & are working on things that look complex. Other kids seem like they need more help. A woman with a laptop is helping a struggling patron apply for benefits. Libraries rock!!!📚 #SupportLibraries

Bernie: "What that is all about is that if you're rich in America, you can make campaign contributions, you are entitled to massive tax breaks because you're superhuman beings. But if you're a poor working stiff, working at McDonald's, struggling to put food on the table, you're entitled to nothing"

I swear, i wasn't prepared for how susceptible literally everyone would be to conspiracy theories as an adult.

If you're wondering, in this case "sides with" means "agreed with the legal argument put forward by" and "sent the case back down to a lower court for further adjudication."

"They're breaking the law." "What law?" "You know, vibes and shit."

This might be the absolute greatest reply we have ever received. Thank you, Cookie Monster 📕🍪💙

Went to the doctor for my lower back pain and he diagnosed me with being my age

I love my kids. But I hate parenting.

please understand that all of my jokes are a personal attack on you

Do not compromise with the GOP. Dismantle the GOP.