since this will always be circulating, i might as well be the first one to put it here: the stretch tips i made many years ago… remember to stop and stretch and take care of your hands! be mindful of your work time & listen to your body.

Will Lewis can't write for shit, is what I'm learning here

Matched with a woman on an app who almost immediately asked me if I was into ancient aliens theories and when I said no, she was like "there was a guy on Joe Rogan talking about new discoveries, it's interesting"

I mean, Trump himself on multiple occasions has said he's "the least racist" president/person so like. Even if you disagree with his ranking, his own description admits that he is racist. So you can answer "yes" to this question and it's not even a bold stance, you're just quoting him

I was deep into sports/sports media until I was like 25 and, now being out of that world, I can AT A GLANCE clock when a "leading" sports media person (McAfee, Stephen A. Smith, Simmons, etc.) is just being graded on a curve. Because these people are almost always just real-world dumb

nobody's ever been cozier. Raptor arms

I designed an 'Eat Shit, Ted Cruz' t-shirt years ago to raise money for good, deserving causes and hey what do you know, the link is right here cottonbureau.com/p/P2HW25/shi...

I'm sorry... Haven't we *always* known this dude was next level racist or

They've disabled quotes but Beethoven, Toulouse-Lautrec, Van Gogh, Frida Kahlo, Goya, Matisse, Cyprián Majerník, Dorothy Stanton Wise

In high school, I had a crush on an older girl and whenever she started dating some guy in her class, I would learn his last name and then whenever I saw him in person, I'd say it out loud under my breath like Jerry saying "Newman!" to make my Seinfeld-loving friends laugh so YEAH I was pretty cool

Sinnesotans 🤙🏼

"??? I'm a sitting senator, I didn't lose shit. I represent over a million people" would've been my response and that's probably why I shouldn't hold office

My favorite is these Hyundai commercials where John Krasinski and Parker Posey are playing themselves but also like having back and forth dialogue with Jason Bateman as the voiceover guy YES THIS MAKES ME WANT CAR

"I could excuse the earlier racism but this one is noteworthy in its racistness"

Geopolitically , this is called the Anakin // Vader Transition

They text each other and have spreadsheets. scary

Currently available on my website! artnessbyjustinbrown.com/store 🫡

With the arrival of the new Muppet Show, may I recommend getting a sticker or two to let everyone know where you stand? 🤙🏼 Available on my website: artnessbyjustinbrown.com/store/ And in my Etsy shop: www.etsy.com/shop/Uncanny...

Okay apparently his first name being Frank is non canonical now so this will be changed

"ACAB Except Columbo" shirts now up in my Cotton Bureau shop cottonbureau.com/people/artne...

As George Lucas once pointed out, happiness comes from pleasure or joy. Pleasure peaks higher but it is perishable, self-serving, and unsustainable. Joy doesn't reach the same heights but stays with you forever because it's based in compassion + connecting to something/someone outside of yourself.

What a fuckin baby

This dude deserves to be dragged behind a horse

Minnesotans giving this energy

"Absinthe Party at the Fly Honey Warehouse" - Minus the Bear "Like a Child Hiding Behind Your Tombstone" - Slothrust "Standing in the Back at Your Show" - Wild Ones "The Rabbit, the Bat, and the Reindeer" - Dr. Dog "This is Where We Came In" - The James Hunter Six

99% of fantasy football recaps, gambling failures, workout details, and golf stories are consistently the least fascinating subjects to listen to (whether you're familiar with them or not)

Liberté Égalité Fúck Elón

I got mine today and will be handing them out to whoever needs them, at every show and convention I do this year

I work with a real jerk, can't stand him, don't even think he knows my name. Today he's suddenly the nicest guy here. Knows my name, knows everyone's name. He's playing the piano. Just saw him surprise a young couple with wrestlemania tickets.

This is a rough shot (both this still and in motion) but the rest of the ad is. Just fine. It seems like it'd have been easier to just have them all at their current age returning to the park in modern day and realize that because of Xfinity Wi-Fi, it's now safe. But I'm a simple man

Important for people to realize that like 30% of all the bad stuff in society is already explicitly illegal it's just not enforced.

Happy Groundhog Day to all who celebrate. This sticker inspired by the long, grey, cold winter is available in both my shops. There's no groundhog emoji 🧜🏼‍♂️ artnessbyjustinbrown.com/store www.etsy.com/shop/Uncanny...

Being forced to hear from this talentless abusive dead-eyed dipshit ten years into this era of garbage is just. exhausting

'Wonder Man' is really nice. It's maybe the first time a Marvel show or movie has gone out of its way to be like "art is good and important" and really let its actors *act* a lot. Also I'm just a sucker for any story that centers itself on a dynamic of "two guys becoming friends and just being pals"

This is what, the 12th anniversary of cops agreeing to this and everyone pretending it will make a difference?

I mean. We learned this pretty conclusively with COVID, no?

⚠️TO EVERY ARTIST HERE ON BLUESKY, WATCH OUT!!⚠️ Don't believe that qAI account, DON'T CLICK ON ANY LINK if you got mentioned by them!! Stay safe y'all🙏💖💖 #moot #artmoot #artistonbluesky #artsky

This is from 5 years ago, has anything changed?

I mean this is like the commemorative 16,000th time he's done this to someone

if you feel like passing around a link today and helping fundraise for rent that will actually get paid today (and in the next few days for families who have a grace period) you can send here. we will be going hard all day. i won’t be posting about it because I don’t want to flood your feeds.

This is who runs this account

Winston Wolf pulls up in this when you've got a Pumpkin Problem®

Neighbors left a Wii console + a ton of games and accessories in a bag on the curb. I'm saging it before testing it out (what if they sucked at Mario Kart? I can't have that energy in here)

That's TWO sold out Timberwolves' arenas

Now occupying the coveted above-the-toilet spot in my bathroom

SCTV is on Internet Archive if you'd like to enjoy the early work of Catherine O'Hara and her fellow sketch comedy gods. S1: archive.org/details/sctv... S2: archive.org/details/sctv... S3: archive.org/details/19-m... S4-5: archive.org/details/66-s... S6 + Cinemax: archive.org/details/sctv... #TVSky