So obviously this is very bad, but the DMV becoming an actual open-air sewer is a wee bit on the nose.

Kids understand that Kirk was such a weird freak who died an ignominious death that they couldn’t find a human being to come up with an anthem for him, they had to turn to AI to take care of this

"iS tHeRe A tEcHnOlOgY lEfTiSt'S aRe ExCiTeD aBoUt??" Well I've just invited a machine that beats people into comas when they ask incredibly inane and thoughtless questions, I'm pretty stoked about that, you absolute turn signal on a BMW. I wrote a whole thread about this already re AI

Please leave me behind.

lent and ramadan kicking off on the same day

chatgpt volcel arc lets goooooo

Wishing a meaningful & reflective Mark Wahlberg 40 Day Challenge to all who observe.

what if i told you, through the power of forensic analysis, we are closer than ever to knowing the exact Far Side cartoon that is making Sting smile in this iconic photo. 🧵 👇

250 years was enough.

After incredible hype, records set, and impossible moves landed, Virginia's own ice twink Ilia Malinin gave a mistake-laden free skate with two devastating falls, proving once again that ice is dangerous for all Americans.

The state of Israel has generated more global antisemitism than the Nazis could have in Hitler's wettest dreams.

If your homies are Roy Cohn and Jeff Epstein, maybe don't pour one out for your homies.

Weakest fascists ever. Even weaker opposition party. Two thumbs down. Boo.

Fr*nkl*, * h*p* h* g*ts sh*t.

We're in the "airing uncensored snuff films on cable news" stage of societal collapse.

Board of Peace - Season 1

poor kafka, forced to churn out new books from his extradimensional prison

Really enjoyed the cuck chair explanation in @jaaavis.bsky.social newsletter.

Now they're calling in the Virginia Air National Guard?! This is a madhouse!

Oh fuck! Now they're shooting everybody with cannons! That didn't take long at all!

Abigail Spanberger just said, "All the doodies incumbent upon me."

Ghazala Hashmi just said, "All the doodies incumbent upon me."

Jay Jones just said, "Discharge all the doodies."

The only pronouns I’m against are AI bots using first person ones

Get your ass back in the race, @governorwalz.mn.gov. Democrats need to stop being gaslit by antiquated notions of parliamentary decorum and obsequiousness. Stop giving the Whiny Baby Snowflake Party every little thing their racist hearts desire.

You ever have a burp that clearly wanted to be a fart?

Anyone who lives in a city on I-95 knows to fear and avoid drivers with North Carolina license plates. I've spent the past two days driving in North Carolina, and I can report that they're all like that.

Trump on Jan. 9, 2024: “I was never on Epstein’s plane.” Newly released documents: Trump was on Epstein’s plane multiple times.

Our decrepit pedophile oligarchs won't stop sucking the blood from our veins until we are desiccated pillars of salt. Everything— every home, every business, every school, every THING is being bought up by private equity to squeeze cash from the ruins of our dying nation. Well, uh... except...

Au-2 D-tism Is this something?

richmond streets cry out for the bollard

Winnie the Pooh is in the Epstein files. Silly Old Bear!

This could be stopped, but DEMS (BLUE no matter WHO) also want this!!! Usa's govt is fighting against us, the citizens. This boi is a nazi.

I don't know who needs to hear this, but you matter, your existence is valid, you're never too young, too old, or too anything to be yourself, and Nikki Minaj is a talentless, stupid cunt.

"Because police are barred from using facial recognition technology to identify the perpetrator, they’re relying on the public for help, Fatehi said." Virginians have a legal right to be in public without an A.I. cataloging their movements. This article frames that as a hindrance to police work. 😓

Corn Pop is in the Epstein Files.

If the Epstein files ever come out, they're definitely gonna be "Oops! All Democrats".

just sleeping off a friday night and someone sends a pic to the ap smdh

It hasn't been easy to shut down forced a i on browsers, software, and apps, but ive been slowly.... turning off automatically "on" a i nuisance features. Im not interested. You should have the choice to opt in/out, not have to turn 78 features off. Its obvious theres no regulation.

It is 2002. I am 18 years old. We are in a once-in-a-generation economic crisis. It is 2008. I am 24 years old. We are in a once-in-a-generation economic crisis. It is 2020. I am 36 years old. We are in a once-in-a-generation economic crisis. It is 2025. I am 41 years old. We are in a—

Got that post-Thanksgiving mpreg.

@reed.bradenstone.com called it macaroni and tears. 😭

*two centuries of nonstop violence go by* "Uhh, let me be clear..."

How much fentanyl do I put in the basting syringe for a large turkey and a family of 8?

If a time traveler offered me one trip to the year 2000, and I could either prevent the events of Sept. 11, 2001 or prevent the release of the song, "Where Are You Christmas," from Jim Carrey's Grinch movie, you would probably really hate me on one specific 9/11 but you'd praise my name every 12/25.

Introduce yourself with four spaceships.

That last sentence. 🤮 How these losers view women is abhorrent. Somehow, queer people's mere existence is wrecking "family values," yet they view women as disposable brood mares and worship a pedophile.

I just dripped coffee from my mustache onto the dick tip of my sweatpants. Now, not only do I look incontinent, I look dehydrated as well. Great.