Welp, I’m addicted to massages now

pretty sure he meant the other thing, grok, but very cool that those are your two things

Roses are red Nazis are lurking Beware of them here because

Made a sign at the warehouse in case I run into the goon squad today

Seeing someone use a photoshop I made six years ago and posted on an entirely different platform is wild. I’m not mad either I’m flattered. I finally made it Ma!

I will eat the forbidden ham

ICE is on my side of town right where I run my route, tomorrow might get interesting

Breaking: protesters are hanging pianos with very thin wires so they fall on the ICE agents heads and then their heads pop up and their teeth are piano keys. They are getting away with WAY too much

Donald Trump with his Nobel Peace Prize

Seriously though Megan got me a gift certificate for a 60 minute massage and I’m very excited about it

Was going to take Megan for a couple’s massage but we can’t because we’re not the same length, I’m much taller than she is.

the presidents goons shot a man in the leg and gassed children last night

I’m not as worried about Trump canceling the elections as I am about them disenfranchising as many voters as possible and doing shit like investigating democrats who win and refusing to swear them in until after. He’s not just going to take a loss and say well shucks we’ll get them next time.

This game was my entire life for like a year and a half

Hearing several reports of ICE being spotted in Wichita where I live

Just got my paid protester bonus

ICE threw a flash bang at a car and it had six kids in it. All six children are in the hospital now.

Every day I see something that I thought only happened in other countries. Today’s example:

Can’t get over how brave the citizens of Minneapolis are

I’m too tired to fact check this but it sounds true so I’m posting it

153 democrats voted yes on this bill, tell me again why I’m expected to show up in November to vote for them like a good little boy.. they are actively aiding a fascist takeover of my country

bluecheck post on twitter: I’ve been drinking my own urine for 32 weeks and I’ve been amazed at how its impacted my stock portfolio S̲h̲o̲w̲ ̲m̲o̲r̲e̲ blueckeck post on bluesky: say what you will but at least Hitler had a heckin doggo unlike taco donny drumpf who hates pupperinos

This is your typical Bluesky reply thread. ACHTUALLLY sir, I am here to one up you

Maybe I’m getting in over my skis here but why are the Steelers looking at Sean McVay’s staff and not trying to interview McVay himself? It’s possible they reached out and he’s not interested.

Item added to cart What?

scanning the QR code of the ICE agent choking me out and it’s the menu to applebees

i am demanding that every train to the gas chambers have a clear and conspicuous unique identifying code

Asking the ICE agent beating a guy up on the pavement to hold still so I can scan his QR code that he was required to wear instead of a badge that can simply be read

The absolute funniest thing the Steelers new head coach could do is to overhaul the entire team and coaching staff and still go 9-8 and lose in the wildcard round next year

Thank you CNN for pointing out that everyone opposed to this regime has normal, pro-social links to the organizations that make up a liveable society where you can do normal shit. Next article you can talk about how the vice president, by contrast, is in nazi groupchats with minors

Haha someone buy this man a beer

If you didn’t follow me on twitter you probably don’t get the joke

It’s time

Updating the meme

Bring in Marcus Freeman for an interview if he’s interested

Man, this is truly wild

Lmao

Time to throw these two old turds in the toilet and flush it

I am hearing that on his deathbed Scott Adams received the light of Islam and unhesitatingly recited the Shahada. Even now he looks down on the Ummah from the gardens of Jannah. Truly there is no god but Allah, and Mohammad is his prophet!

I personally think it’s time for a coaching change but I don’t expect it to happen so I’m not going to bash my head against the wall about it. If Tomlin stays I’ll still root for him to succeed, if he goes I’m fine with that too.

so it’s a police force, got it, thanks

Welp see you guys next year to do this all over again

Nothing but respect for DeMeco Ryans and the Texans, I’m rooting for them next week

Aaron Rodgers in the pocket

Well that should just about do it

JPJ has quietly had an incredible season

Picked off! Can’t wait to punt the ball away in five minutes!