Hard to overstate how important "1,039 Smoothed Out Slappy Hours" was to my musical journey. That's the one I had because I picked a tape at random, and I didn't have a second one because of $. Kids need to bring back "sticking with an artist's fifth-best album because it's the only one you have"

I guess I knew that some of them were liquored up as they zoomed around and terrorized people, but I didn't expect it to be a communal thing. Super naive of me.

Effectively Wild Episode 2437: Season Preview Series: Giants and Royals blogs.fangraphs.com/effectively-...

sorry, but i think this is a VERY common name that most people think about at least once a day

there's gotta be a better way to say this

they're calling it "the worst case of pixelitis we've ever seen"

Even with all the media cover, arresting and deporting five year olds and doing racist shit at the Obamas is simply something that people who watch The Big Bang Theory are going to dislike

AI TANNER BIBEE: Ah, yes. Upon further review, that actually might look infected, thank you for calling me out on that! What we're looking for: ✅ A red area around the mark ✅ Discharge (the clearer the better) ❌ A line going straight from the wound to your heart or brain

When I was 44 years old, I finished up a playoff game story with a broken elbow. TSN's silence on that tells me everything I need to know about their priorities.

Baseball is indeed very conservative, but if you're making this from voter registration data, you're missing a HUGE swath of players. Probably better to read these numbers as "American-born," maybe?

the internet used to be good

i don't know what the reaction is going to be, but i do know that i plan on getting so close to him that he can *feel* my boos. (I will still be in California.)

Reading about him going to Vegas and getting rowdy with the fellas reminds me that I haven't watched 25th Hour in a while.

only invested $40,000 and feeling pretty smug about it right now tbh

Same place we all will :(

Quoting my alt to build awareness of this perfect album, which is a must for anyone interested in the intersection of folk, country, and psych in the '60s

oh no they should not be there, that is not the right sport at all, someone get them out

tigers right now

this is real, and we have to get to the bottom of it

Renfeild: I booked your passage on the Demeter, master Dracula: thankfs. dont foret the box of,, dert

if I had to pretend to enjoy Kid Rock, i'd simply reject my deepest held beliefs.

I, personally, have never sent an email like this to a child molester four years after they got out of prison. I think that sort of thing should be “frowned upon.”

This is incredible. It’s going to be so fun to load up the family and catch a game at The Big Merkin.

He was already on the “other” list instead of the “jail” list, but I just underlined his name twice to make sure.

AI Chatbot That Only Responds ‘Huh’ Valued At $200 Billion https://theonion.com/ai-chatbot-that-only-responds-huh-valued-at-200-billion/

Our status has regretfully shifted to "it's complicated." The Athletic will not be bringing The Roundtable back, and we are asking for permission to yammer about baseball somewhere else. The three of us still want to do it, but ... well, it's complicated.

The big tech founder whose 417-foot, $500 million superyacht needs a 256-foot, $75 million superyacht to "shadow" it -- because the bigger yacht lacks a helipad -- had to cut his paper's newsroom almost in half, for reasons

I've never been a conspiracy theory guy, but you're never gonna convince me that there hasn't been a specific cabal of ultra-rich dullards trying to buy, strangle, and bring to heel all of the most important reality-shaping machines since the uptick in power labor had during COVID

Still my champ

The most surreal part is that’s a Mini Cooper he’s standing next to for scale.

I wrote about this being the greatest year in Seattle sports history for the Seattle Met. www.seattlemet.com/news-and-cit...

when i die, all i really want is to find out if I typed "GIants" or "Gaints" more in my lifetime.

Matthew 25:35 is great, but you gotta keep going to 45. That's the ones that details how all of these freaks get booted down into the eternal fire. I hope they think about it every night when they close their eyes.

Rest Of Lakers Trying To Act Casual While LeBron James Spanks Bronny https://theonion.com/rest-of-lakers-trying-to-act-casual-while-lebron-james-spanks-bronny/

i think it's a good thing that mobs hassle the unrepentant friends of notorious sex offenders.

i don't want to be a conspiracy theorist about this, but Brokaw only got his invite after Gerald Ford died (eaten by wolves)

seeing a lot of people complain about this, but when you read the fine print, it's going to be a literal avatar who gets rid of your kidney stones with waterbending and it's going to be incredible

dude looks like a Commodore 64 version of Lyle Lovett

damn, that mask was doing way more work than I thought

you need to change, like, five letters to turn this into a line from Godfather II

imagine the thousands and thousands of unbelievable horrors going on if we're just hearing about "regularly kidnapping legal residents, dropping them off in a different state, and telling them to deal with it"

my dude, reagan didn't even win minnesota

If I traveled back to 2016 to warn people about what happens in the future, I'd stop to pitch "Lawnmower Man, the TV series" to Netflix while they were still throwing bags of money around.

Slash has been ratatouilling this whole time, it’s rock’s worst kept secret

getting fired on my first day as sous chef for asking “why don’t you just use 1 large carrot”

This incident alone would have triggered hearings and probably a senior-level resignation in another administration.

Everywhere I go, people are talking about coffee prices. “Can you believe these coffee prices?”, they say. “I don’t even recognize this country anymore (because of the coffee prices.)

The world is a mess and we’re all going to die, but at we least we have The Limey DVD commentary with Steven Soderbergh and Lem Dobbs.