get the kid in the brown hoodie a scholarship

Cris Collinsworth is so desperate to predict the outcome of the game that he can’t talk about anything else. “This little sequence right here could determine the whole thing!”

Observed on the street in Paris…

This was murder, y’all.

The media should cover sport the way they cover the state murder of civilians: ‘Jannik Sinner appeared to win the French Open yesterday after what supporters say was a comeback from being two sets down.’

The entire southeastern United States losing electricity during the NFC/AFC Championship games is *definitely* on the list of the NFL’s worst nightmares. #nfl

If you're looking for a sign to switch careers: this is the sign.

Viewed objectively as someone who does not favor either team, that was a damn good football game. #nfl #broncos #bills

If anyone has old sport’s trophies 🏆 or medals 🥇 may I suggest sending them to 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue in DC.

It’s interesting that the very same *jagoffs* who refused to wear masks five years ago now wear them gleefully so that they can beat the shit out of people they encounter on the street. #sothisisfreedom #theymustbejoking

Please stop calling ICE agents ‘law enforcement.’ They are Border Patrol, they are mercenaries. They are hired thugs whose sole job is to scare the hell out of brown people.

Since these shameless, lying liars are going to lie straight to our faces, it’s time for action. We the people can force panic, and we can force needed change. Boycott everything. Don’t buy anything you can live without. Starve the billionaires. Show them that we will not stand for this.

We have to stop complying with a government that does not represent us. We can’t just talk this around endlessly; it’s time for revolution.

Nick Saban and I are not watching the same football game. Either that, or someone needs to shuffle him off to the retirement home asap.

Proving that war can be both popular and convenient… www.bbc.com/news/article...

The best thing they’ve got is to turn the government off and then back on? That doesn’t even work on my iPhone. #shutdown

“Remember, any man you tackle gets an elbow, knee, or kick in the mouth!”

Right about now, we all need a timeline cleanse…

I worked at CNN (before it became a horrible channel) for five years and I'm here to say that 24 hour news channels were a fucking mistake. No one needs access to news on TV all day, every day.

A SEAL team was authorized by Donald Trump, shots were fired and civilians were killed, and he doesn’t remember it? What a fucking amateur. www.nytimes.com/2025/09/05/u...

When you successfully kill a vampire

Please use this as my new avatar. Thank you and goodnight.

littlehouseontheprairie.com/lauras-front... Wilder’s unique, creative fusion of childhood memory, fairy tale, family chronicle, western history and love of the living prairie still resonates strongly today.

My preferred outcome is that the entire Belichick situation becomes funnier and funnier and so far so good

Fact check: True.

The perfect bird feeder doesn't exi--

May the Fourth be with you.

So, what did I do to this little putz? 😂😀😂

It’s not the first time. 😂

I'm rewatching Andor, which I believe to be the best Star Wars artwork ever made, and I strongly suggest you consider (re)watching it as well. It is relevant to our moment in too many ways to count—not just all the obvious ones, and not just with respect to the protagonists but the antagonists also.

The US government has the ability to protect its citizens from damaging storms, floods, and hurricanes, but instead chooses to spend that money padding billionaire’s bank accounts. Got it? apple.news/AY8TZUMTiQ62...

The outrage is the whole point.

I think that Velma here is wearing a bath mat.

Some people belong on mute and that’s just a goddamned fact.

Your assignment this week is to read a book that some “Mom for Liberty” would bring to a school board meeting and cry about.

They were careless people, Tom and Daisy- they smashed up things and creatures and then retreated back into their money or their vast carelessness or whatever it was that kept them together, and let other people clean up the mess they had made. -FS Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby, published 4/10/1925.

You set the house on fire, watched it burn, and then lost your nerve and put it out. You now have a partially burned house. Great job.

Last time I come to a Home Goods men’s room for solace

Look y’all I finally found Jesus.

I’m taking Voodoo lessons.

Mike White hurt my feelings. #thewhitelotus

Excited for all the new American banana and coffee factories.

I've said this a million times but I'll say it again: the Dems constantly debating in public about whether to fight, and where to fight, and what language to use in fighting, and whether this is the right fight ... all of that just loudly broadcasts *weakness*, no matter what they conclude.

Oh man, somebody get him out of there. He’s crazy.

I googled "houses that look surprised" and I'm glad I did.

👀

there’s a Raising Cane’s in Times Square that has a DJ for some reason

Hegseth screaming into the cameras is a really good look.