If a Croque Madame talked to another Croque Madame about anything other than a Croque Monsieur Would they have passed the Béchamel test?

Standup about current events tends not to age well. That's why I make sure my material is nevergreen.

The Solid Gold Dancers are on Instagram. Just thought you should know. www.instagram.com/reel/DOCAbrw...

This hit me so hard this week.

This. All of this. #Pinks #ProudBlue

It's Stevie Wonder's birthday, which means your feed should be filled with the good shit. www.youtube.com/watch?v=dv0v...

Going through old screenshots and came across this Girls5Eva classic.

Just had my shingles vaccine, thus signaling the transition to my final form. This aching body, merely a chrysalis. Tomorrow I emerge, terrifying and inevitable.

This is the University of Central Florida. So many people really have no idea how much kids hate this shit.

I caught up with the always wonderful @christianfinnegan.bsky.social

What all of this “should we start smoking again?” discourse ignores is how bad everyone’s breath was when smoking was rampant. Clothes like ashtrays, mouths like baggies of wet dog shit. Let’s not bring that back.

If anyone can point me to a Noah Kahan song more interesting than literally anything you’d head at coffee house open mic, I’m all ears.

I read this and wanted to dunk on it like everyone, but the person he praises for doing things CORRECTLY is Mamdani. Mamdani, who is perhaps the most college-y politician of my lifetime. And I mean that as a compliment!

A fantastic interview with @brianstack153.bsky.social , who belongs in the late night hall of fame.

Saying this now, just in case - - New Yorkers hated Giuliani on 9/10, couldn't wait to get rid of him - Giuliani was in the street on 9/11 bc the Command Center at 7WTC was destroyed (he put it there to be near Judi Nathan) - Giuliani killed 343 firemen by forcing cheap radios on them

Not trying to gatekeep, but those who lived in NYC while Rudy was mayor should get first dibs on grave-pissing.

Not trying to gatekeep, but those who lived in NYC while Rudy was mayor should get first dibs on grave-pissing.

I'm sorry, but that constantly-airing PNC Bank ad where the parents sell their kids' "naming rights" at graduation is all wrong, from a comedy writing standpoint.

Duncan Robinson’s stupid mustache makes him look like a prohibition era gangster, as drawn by Matt Groening.

“Zomething Different…”

7:54am. My 2nd #greatsaunter begins. Why am I doing this for a second time? I crave pain and discomfort!

Thank you, Orlando Magic. Sincerely, The Atlanta Hawks

Name your top 15 TV shows ever, gut instincts only— Mr. Show The Wire Deadwood The Sopranos 30 Rock Veep Rome Battlestar Galactica Mad Men Game of Thrones Fargo Better Call Saul American Vandal The Great Party Down

Fifth wheel. Always. Three wheels makes a tricycle, which is perfectly useful.

Rhythm Aryan Nation over here

An interesting perspctive open.substack.com/pub/someofth...

NYC folks: Anyone else doing the Great Saunter this Saturday?

Just jet-skied the strait of hormuz. It was totally chill. You’re all pussies.

when you realize this is the average median voter, all the online debates about "why kamala lost" go out the window

Excited to announce that this 90s nickelodeon ass looking frozen pizza has changed the lazy dinner game.

This is excellent. “It’s not that the wealthy become evil; it’s that their environment stops teaching them the things that nonwealthy people are forced to learn simply by living in a world that pushes back.”

Folks, find your way to one of these dates. Programme 4 is a minor miracle.

Yeah, but can AI do this?

Hostel Takeover was my favorite reality show on MTV Europe.

Reporter: What do you make of Republicans saying that Virginia— AOC: Wah wah wah. We have asked Republicans for 10 years to ban partisan gerrymandering. And for 10 years, Republicans have said no. What they’re just mad at is that they have been accustomed to a Democratic Party that rolls over.

Well looky here... newmusicforolds.substack.com/i/192664252/...

Oh fuck, am I starting to get into Warren Zevon? I guess the jig really is up.

More actual clips of Prince, fewer “even ten years later I have tears in my eyes I can barely type I’m so overwhelmed with emotion” posts.

Contentious band meeting: Queen “Name one, Freddie. Name literally one person who’s ever referred to you as ‘Mr. Fahrenheit’.“

Almost started a political thread. Man, that was close.

Sorry, I thought this was a picture of me as a doctor.

It’s not unfunny that Donald Trump, god-king of marketing, seemingly has no grasp of Catholicism’s brand identity.

YOU GOT SO OLD

My guy has a +5 wallet chain.

Here's the thing: Democrats already know who can win. They know which policies are popular with voters and which candidates are vocally in support of those policies. They're going to throw a billion dollars into trying to prevent those candidates from becoming the nominee.

Tech dummy question: is anyone else having a Bluesky issue where, if you click on an image and then go back to your feed, it re-sets all the way to the top instead of where you left off? Should I reinstall the app?

Shut up and pope!

Closed for renovations, but still pretty cool in my book.