He was bobbing for apples in the toilet

I think the reason people hate on oatmeal raisin cookies is they thought they grabbed a chocolate chip and are really just angry at themselves for their own lack of due diligence. Elon musk looks like he got bit by a cloverfield bug. 2-in-1 DoublePost®

Greatest city in the world, etc. hellgatenyc.com/andrew-cuomo...

Maybe we never see the Epstein files but if we do they won’t be a letdown

Help needed remaking the "My Bangers" feed. Anyone? (below is my attempt)

Ryan Grim like:

“They didn’t just walk in chasing one person, they went into multiple rooms asking and looking for teachers while children were present,” Ramirez said. “This is an agency that has gone rogue and it an agency that believes that as long as they can cover their face, they can get away with anything.”

Let’s all get a Kickstarter going to fund this movie

When I think of the hurdles Elon Musk has to clear to get his $1 trillion payday, I'm reminded of the joke that "God put me on earth to accomplish a certain number of things, I am so far behind I will never die."

You must vote for Carnivorous Death Ball if you want to stop Trump. Don’t listen to the purists!

I think a lot about the story Carl Reiner told: he’d have been a sewing machine repairman if not for a free WPA drama class. That led to other theater work, to Sid Caesar, to Mel Brooks, and all the rest. All because of one free class paid for by a government that felt the arts were worth teaching.

What exactly was the Felony Footlong sandwich beyond mustards and onion (allegedly)?

ok I dug around under the hood following the advice from this post and turned EVERYTHING off, will report back

@teslatakedown.com enormous caveats on that pay package

Tesla shareholders approve a $1T pay package for Elon Musk if he hits a series of milestones and expands Tesla's market cap to $8.5T over the next 10 years (Becky Peterson/Wall Street Journal) Main Link | Techmeme Permalink

I love the smell of onions and mustard in the morning!

you'll definitely wanna go and make sure because turns out they had engaged the nanny locks for everything on mine

Sometimes you get high and start waxing idiotic about how The Simpsons is about the journey from Judaism ("Abraham" Simpson) to Hellenism ("Homer" Simpson) and then finally to Christianity ("Bartholomew" Simpson) and then someone tells you to shut the fuck up, and they’re right to do so.

@zohrankmamdani.bsky.social bring back Andy Byford, please! Also, congrats on the win

Hey chat, should I “rewatch” Mr. Robot (haven’t seen it many years and didn’t finish second season) or Watch The Expanse for the first time but only paying 60-70% attention (I have 2 kids)

Sometimes you’re like “why do Silicon Valley billionaires control everything” and you see Nancy pelosi and are like “oh… right… thanks Nancy!”

Forgot she was still alive

Saw someone say that the enraged radicalized wine moms are going to impose Sangria Law and honestly that’s pretty good

They really don’t know how much we all hate them. Let’s show them every day forever (especially Nov 2026)

Wanna “do something”?

Leave Vichy Twitter and tell your favorite accounts and anyone who might listen to you to do the same

There are actually very few movies you “couldn’t make today because of woke.” But there are a hell of a lot of movies that you couldn’t make today because of anti-woke.

I knew it would take less than a day for a tiktok dj to make something.

Turn up the volume

If your trip is cancelable, I’d cancel it

Totally thought Rudy was dead for some reason

This is what I’m talking about when I say these signs and locked doors are coming to a city near you.

congratulations to the fascist regime for turning normie white liberals into people who definitionally are no longer normie white liberals

if you can't savor the villains losing you've lost the spark of beauty and ingenuity that makes life worth living

this is so much better than the last time we were all new yorkers

Yes, this would also be a nice option for Bluesky labelers and filters.

(Of course, prediction market trades don’t necessarily reflect the belief that the outcome will necessarily happen — they also incorporate people who are arbitraging between platforms, people taking longshot bets on hopes of a big payoff, etc.)

if you’re upset about how poisoned our societal conversation about AI is, I get it, and also, this is very much the fault of the unholy alliance of sociopath Silicon Valley billionaires and MAGA goons that have spent the last two years working VERY hard to make lots of nice normal people loathe AI

Yes! Most people's experience with AI is not "a very tedious, data-heavy, repetitive process that if automated could vastly improve the quality of my work and job." It's "mom sending me fake videos of riots in her neighborhood, she's scared to go outside" or "trump shits on protestors."

“These people and their fucking tree houses.” — Andrew Cuomo on the Jewish holiday Sukkot

Defense wants gag gifts provided to the officer after the incident included in discovery. One is a plushie sandwich and another is a patch that says, if I heard correctly, “Felony Footlong.” Sounds like we won’t end up seeing these physically but will hear them described.

Free reaction meme if anyone wants it:

border patrol agent lairmore is going to get roasted by the boys every day for the rest of his pathetic little life

I love the smell of onions and mustard in the morning!

Mamdate of Heaven

Dick in a Box youtu.be/Rt0spqQtMKg?...

Rest in Piss, Dick