2026: RFK Jr takes on the nixtamalization-industrial complex, finally removing limestone-based toxins from the nation's food supply and removing the ever-present threat of niacin poisoning.

Someone realized it was about to be called the Donald J Trump And John F Kennedy Memorial Center and panicked.

I'm at The Donald Trump And I'm at The John F Kennedy Memorial Center. I'm at the Combination The Donald Trump And The John F Kennedy Memorial Center.

Like you could open a factory that does nothing except fill swimming pools with water and vaporize them with a high powered laser and it would still somehow be a net water savings if the land you built it on replaced an almond farm.

Amelia Bedilia Leaves Her Phone At Home To Have A Conversation In The Woods Next To A Waterfall

Debatable.

Nobody. I do not think you can eat chair

The USS Enterprise is such a compelling ship design because it’s a nice hotel in space with all-inclusive amenities. A replicator is a minibar you don’t have to pay for. The holodeck is the futuristic equivalent of free HBO

This is one of those things that I think is quietly important – when these people are talking shit about cities, Portland or Minneapolis or New York or Charlotte or wherever, you have to loudly say, “no, fuck you, you’re lying, that town and its people whip ass and you’re the asshole”

this isn't a Russian poem, this is not somewhere else but here, our country moving closer to its own truth and dread, its own ways of making people disappear. -Adrienne Rich, What Kind of Times Are These #everynightapoem it's necessary to talk about trees.

I have refined The uranium That was in The centrifuge And which You were probably Saving For power generation Forgive me It was so powerful I am Become death

"strong floor no ceiling" describes a pit

"$1,000 a month as part of a state program experimenting with giving homeless youths cash payments for two years with no strings attached." "Of the 117 youths [..] who completed Oregon's two-year pilot program, 91% reported being in stable housing." #Oregon #USA #Housing #Nonprofit

🤜🤜🤜(((the recursive universe)))🤛🤛🤛

Journalist challenge: Use “Machine Learning” when you mean machine learning and “LLM” when you mean LLM. Ditch “AI” as a catch-all term, it’s not useful for readers and it helps companies trying to confuse the public by obscuring the roles played by different technologies. 🧪

Having been directly observed, the divisiveness potentiality waveform of the swastika has collapsed.

Happy Day Of Cis People Reminding You How Dangerous It Is To Be Trans But Simultaneously Being Really Surprised When You Tell Them About All The Ways It's Recently Gotten More Dangerous to all who celebrate.

Simply cannot stop being pedantic about this: if the swastika is only "potentially divisive," what would it take to cross that threshold of potentiality? If the Schmittian Friend-Enemy distinction, the Nuremburg Laws and the Holocaust didn't do it, what would *actual divisiveness* look like?

Swastikas will cease to be divisive when every single Nazi is dead and their grandchildren have forgotten their names.

All The Shit We Fixed Before You Got Here 202: Now That We Have That Sorted Q1: How To Scuttle Spanish Caravels Q2: Logistics of Vaccine and Penicillin Production in the Gulf Coast and Caribbean of 1470: From Theory To Practice Q3 & Q4: Case Studies in Trans-Temporal Kalashnikov Distribution

Jesus to his disciples:

Hey, since Patton Oswalt was reinstated, maybe Bluesky moderation can reinstate someone who was banned for doing the exact same thing.

you have to give it to them, 2.8°C does in fact guarantee you'll never lose an election again

Real tweets from the White House are indistinguishable from anti-Trump AI slop. Or, in this case, 1990s Adbusters parodies.

New Anal RV Game variant just dropped.

Well, you already said she was a prison guard. So.

Ok but eating roadkill is fine. the problem is that rfk jr eats roadkill AND doesn't understand germ theory or basic food safety.* (*And that he was killed by an extraterrestrial Bug who crash-landed in New York in 1997 and has been wearing RFK's skin as an unconvincing disguise ever since.)

Happy Partially Muscled Skeleton Stands by the Perimeter Fence and Screams for 30 Seconds Before Vanishing Day to all who observe.

Ok but only if the bjork CD played through during foreplay.

Well, it's a little clearer now why billionaires are so invested in technology that produces better written emails.

Very excited for us to get our Jimmy Savile/Maggie Thatcher BBC coverup moment, but while some of them are still alive and can have their lives ruined about it.

Pizzagate: If you replace the word “hot dog” with “little boy” and “pizza party” with “child sex orgy,” you will see the lengths these elites go to cover up their crimes. Real elite emails: Send me nude pictures of those 8th graders we abused last weekend post-haste! I am the Ambassador to Turkey.

Pigs.

Due to a backlog of cases, as Gregor Samsa awoke one morning from uneasy dreams he found himself transformed in his bed into a persona non grata.

the birth of World Figure Skating Championship Silver Medalist Tonya Harding also falls on 11/12/1970, making today Harding-Whalebomb, Oregon's national holiday. May you attack your problems with ill-considered, poorly directed, and overwhelming force. May the results live in infamy. 💥⛸️🐋💥

🚨HAPPY EXPLODING WHALE DAY🚨 1/n www.oregonlive.com/travel/2024/...

Thank you, Representative Sarah McBride, for presenting a boldly inclusive new vision in your speech, "Bisexuals are the Third Position of Sexual Politics."

This exact same reporter was ousted from the NY Times for soliciting a $30,000 donation from Epstein— and you're telling me that as an employer, the NY Times never bothered to circle back and review this person's correspondence with a convicted pedophile?

Musk: joyce carol oates? she a very meana lady! Musk: she usa too many semicolons! Mortal Kombat Announcer: FINISH HIM Oates: i hear you have a cool daughter Oates: a normal dad would be very proud Mortal Kombat Announcer: FATALITY

After yesterday’s surrender, we’re launching the largest Democratic primary program that we’ve ever run. We will not back any Senate primary candidate unless they call for Schumer to step down as Minority Leader. If you’re as pissed as we are, join this campaign to rebuild the Democratic Party. 👇

Make Democratic Leadership Afraid Of A Global Anti-capitalist Uprising Led By Their Core Constituencies Again.

Senator Odysseus (D - Ithaca) says he will not seek reelection, after an impromptu meeting with Senate Siren leadership, in which the Sirens offered "strong commitments" as part of a plan to smash ships upon rocks as sharp as spears and have Ithacan sailors join a meadow filled with skeletons.

Pretty much all affordability discourse could benefit from just posting this chart. If you're in the better off America, all the luxury goods you want in excess are for the most part much cheaper. If you're in the poorer America, most of the shit you need to live/grow is more expensive.

I still think it's absurd that they give up now, when I think a much more understandable play would be holding the line and letting the GOP ruin thanksgiving and then doing something to avert ruining Christmas

The model of holding individual senators responsible is broken here. The retirees clearly agreed to take the fall. Which is why the nos should get no credit for voting no unless they move to oust Schumer

Not to Andor post here too much but the DSA pitch to Indivisible is a simple one: Don't you want to fight these bastards for real?

primary every last dem senator

"...and what do you call this act?" "The Senate Democrats!"