SPACE WITCH: We must check if you are the magical girlboy. Put your hand in the magic pain box. It causes extreme pain. PAUL JIHAD: Why? SPACE WITCH: What are you, a pussy? PAUL JIHAD: No! Watch this. OW. I can so this all day. SPACE WITCH: lol. You just put your hand in the oven, dipshit.

I really feel like a game of "match the MAGA lady with her original face" would be more challenging than folks may realize. If you showed me that picture without knowing who it was I'd never know it was Noem.

TRANS DAY OF VISIBILITY REMINDER: today, cis people can see you. Keep this in mind when plotting any heists, schemes, or exploits. Cis people can also see you on any previously recorded CCTV footage which they review today, as well as any such footage captured today, even if viewed in the future.

That's right

Oh huh, I wonder if it worked.

Attack and Dethrone God Squad. www.theguardian.com/us-news/2026...

Pope Leo says God rejects prayers of leaders who wage wars reut.rs/4rZIThC

crucial security advice

FOX NEWS: Why isn't Trump involved in trying to end the government shutdown? MIKE JOHNSON: I think he is involved FOX NEWS: He shot down the plan yesterday JOHNSON: Well, that's what's been reported FOX NEWS: He said it in the Oval Office

At some point people are going to realize they’ve been viewing this war and this moment through a delusional lens and the dying vapors of American exceptionalism and then all hell is going to break loose.

Because real trek hits its stride in season 2.

guy who gets mad at ice at the airport because candy crush is for fake gamers

I've started imagining everything the president says through the filter of a 3rd grade boy who doesn't know what's happening, but hears grownups use words & ideas which he tries to repeat when asked questions. Please let me know if you find any presidential statements that don't fit this filter.

Introduce the Strait Of Hormuz to the Queers Of Hormuz and the MDMA Of Hormuz and eventually maybe the Poppers Of Hormuz

Remember when the Onion bought Infowars and then a judge stepped in and blocked the sale because apparently they wanted to watch Alex Jones fail entirely on his own merits?

Oof

Fun fact: 54% of US adults read below a 6th grade level. You have to actively remember literally over half the US adult population is *unable to perceive subtext* www.thenationalliteracyinstitute.com/2024-2025-li...

"A security guard and Gulf War veteran parked his rented truck under the Alfred P Murrah building for what could have been a normal day taking in the sites in beautiful Oklahoma City..."

what do you do when your desired outcome (banning gender-affirming care) goes against the medical consensus? easy: simply exclude 97% of the relevant medical studies from your review...

every day i wake up and say "surely the NYT cannot stray any further from the light of God" and they apparently hear my incredulous statement as a challenge to print the dumbest fucking shit imaginable in a paper of record.

Paul Simon

Moveon dot org petition to send brian kilmeade and the hosts of Fox & Friends through the strait of Hormuz on a tanker in order to show some guts.

Thank you, @wired.com, for acknowledging that, as a category of thing to report on. "AI" is not actually tech, nor is it culture, nor can it really be said to be a business, nor does it have any capacity to reach anything we might call "beyond."

Star Trek Voyager: Fire Walk With Me

If nothing else, AI psychosis makes me feel a lot more justified in my belief in tarot. That's archetypes motherfucker, that's states of being that persist across time and cultures I'd rather light some candles and pour over cards than talk to an autocorrect machine pretending to be a President

You only have a short time to comment. They are trying to destroy our forests to enrich a few logging company executives and the politicians they’ve paid off. Leave your comment here: eplanning.blm.gov/Participate-... morethanjustparks.substack.com/p/blm-announ...

Men think they were meant to live in the Roman Empire until they’re getting conscripted into open-ended territorial wars by pedophiles

So uh, any idea what would happen if a trans person from a different state got pulled over while driving through Kansas rn? Like sure, legally a driver's license issued in a different state is valid in all states, but following the law is increasingly optional for gov't actors so....

Abolish the legal gender marker entirely. No government can be trusted to have a database of which people have changed theirs, no government has any business tracking what your gender is "supposed" to be in the first place.

When you think about it, the 3 million horses alive in 1960 were a lot more free that the 26.5 million horses alive in 1915. A horse born in 1915, reaching the end of their life expectancy in 1940 in a world with half as many horses probably thought "this makes me twice as free as I used to be!"

Genuine question for pro-AI people: what DO you want to do with your life? Because it sounds like you don't actually want to do anything that requires effort, ever, and I think you need to consider that you are clinically depressed.

Witch here: those people aren't witches, they're debauched nobility satisfying their obscene whims upon the children of the commoners. This isn't a witch hunt, it's a peasant revolt.

Counterpoint: Sam Altman has been alive and eating food since April 22, 1985.

Now THAT's a headline. "The U.S. spent $30 billion to ditch textbooks for laptops and tablets: The result is the first generation less cognitively capable than their parents" fortune.com/2026/02/21/l...

Out: "discord leaks" as a plural noun In: "discord leaks" as a sentence

“I don’t want to be in this place I want to go to my school.” - 7 year old imprisoned by ICE for 70 days in a concentration camp in Texas. Today, after @propublica.org published this story, the camp was raided to confiscate letters from the children. www.propublica.org/article/ice-...

Reference images, for clarity The picture on the left shows the distribution of Scots The picture on the right shows a distribution of Scotts

Everything we do to protect communities, we do for free, as willing volunteers. That goes for the vast majority of those who resist ICE. Everything ICE agents do to terrorize communities, they do for money, and that money comes out of our pockets. The longer they go without paychecks, the better.

first time in new york since zohran took office and other than having to recite the shahada on arrival at laguardia nothing much has changed

I mean technically yes but they still did 9/11 so 🤷‍♂️

Yeah, good. Ok.

Capitalism must die on Earth.

Join a union and you too can call the president a bitch consequence-free!

FBI went on to clarify that Epstein was actually just running a sex trafficking ring for the love of the game, and that Powerful Men were just along for the ride.

Every Super Bowl ad is for the door in the forest. It’s annoying. “You must walk through the door.” Yeah thanks, I know that already. I dream of the door every night

Portland: I would like to remind you all, in this trying time, of our city's proud tradition of nuncocks (2 dildos connected by a cord, thrown over power lines like sneakers) www.reddit.com/r/Portland/c...

Kier Starmer and Greg Bovino: who will finally break down crying first?

DHS should under no circumstances be allowed to have more time on this earth than Tupac got.

We often rightly focus on how evil these people are but we also have to remember that they are weird little nasty pervert freaks.