tfw when I'm not allowed to see the aurora borealis

When you have six vodka tonics

Last month: running along a highway, recently pregnant, starving and terrified😭 Now: spayed, vaccinated, dewormed, 2 big meals a day (+ treats!!) and sprawled belly-up in a king-size bed ❤️

Very sad but proud of myself right now. A nice old lady called looking for her best friend whom she loved so much. I had to tell her that her friend died 2 months ago, that's why she was not calling her back. She got so upset and apologized a lot, but I was able to comfort her a little

Attention Baltimore please be aware the owner of La Vintage Charcuteria is posting all the messages of support she's gotten since then and oh boy is it not helping her case

"Scared of Charlotte" is a whole new level of "scared of cities" that I'd never even considered possible

No one is listening to you except your phone

Hello to moisturizing deep conditioning treatment season 😮‍💨

Breaking: Marion County agrees to pay out $3M for newspaper raid, express regret kansasreflector.com/2025/11/11/m...

My last word on the matter

And your glasses will be ready

STARSHIP TROOPERS (1997)

It's sad how people said those Bratz dolls were going to fuck up the kids, and others responded no, racism, what about Barbie, ext. But like, they totally did fuck the kids up real bad 😬

should we all move back to europe and be like jk we never left what’s america lol you guys are crazy anyway where is my health insurance at

Winter: undefeated against Nazis since 1941

That uhh doesn't really seem like they've ceased fire now does it

Oh thank God, she deserves better than that ugly piece of shit. He would have just banged her and left, and nobody on this earth can convince me he's a good fuck.

Idiom Origin “pull yourself up by your bootstraps” This was originally *sarcasm* & meant to convey that the act was impossible. A boot strap is a loop used to help put your boot on. This 1921 cartoon from the “Nonpartisan Leader” showcases that you can’t pull upward on your boots to levitate.

Remember when she compared the keffiyeh to a swastika? Because I do...

looks like he brought a bento lunch, smart

Ok someone on Instagram reality just called a broad out saying no one is shaped like Crash Bandicoot, and I about swallowed my tongue. That's gonna pop up whenever I see one of these ultra shopped "all natural" girls lol

I'm going to start a bowling team where everyone has to dress like a Big Lebowski character. I get to alternate between Maude and one of the nihilists

I don't know if anyone ever considered this before but I think we should have a left wing party in the United States. Just my opinion

It's so cold today, and I'm still trying to find winter pants so I was feeling bad I dressed super casual in leggings and a sweatshirt with a high neck. Thanks thank gods I did, it's 56° in my building! If this is how it's gonna be then I'll just order more cute sweatshirts and leggings. Fuck it

Lulu did well at her first class. She learned some things, but more importantly she was comfortable around the other people and dogs and paid attention

no quote about the US political system has ever gone harder than this one

Accurate meme

It's an REM flashback week. Yes week, I got a lot and we are using every tool we got to cope with the world

This is my favorite part of this cycle we've been repeating for my entire adult life: when they sit backwards on the chair for some real talk and explain that you're a fucking peasant who doesn't understand how things work.

RAISE YOUR VOICE: Now is the time to pledge your support for banning octopus farming. Octopus farming would be an ethical and environmental disaster, but with enough public support, we can protect octopuses from a lifetime of suffering: secure.everyaction.com/lE4sjpZgqUST...

Hamburger helps those that help themselves

Lol I said the same thing earlier. Glad we're all on the same page

oh my god

Real ones out here listening to Django Reinhardt rn

I wish the loudest of the insane people here were not also annoying as shit

Honestly I think the NYT reporting on Bat Boy would probably be more honest journalism at this point.

Losers love losing, it’s how they win

I love this time of year when bugs are dying

they don’t care about you and they never will until a third party is sufficiently strong enough to challenge their complex and difficult to maintain position of constantly losing to the most racist people on the planet

The year is 2039. My family and I live in the wreckage of a now-defunct data center, where we scrounge components to sell to rare-earth scrappers. The Democrats are folding on a campaign pledge to ensure that God-Emperor Barron Trump's signature "Babies Is Food Now" measure isn't extended

I received this email about Democrats caving to end the shutdown from one of the SNAP recipients I spoke to:

Is it time?

Ohh, there's no bread, let them eat cake There's no end to what they'll take Flaunt the fruits of noble birth Wash the salt into the earth