😕🇺🇸

Rick Astley's boxing career was very short lived.

What I really love about the northern lights is living really close to an airport and not being able to see it.

Just done the washing up. If I don’t get given an award for this I’m invading Greenland.

The cow uprising has begun.

The EU and UK should shut down X just as they shut down RT - and in fact I think it is likely that they will eventually. The question is, how much damage will be done by then?

How long do ear worms last? I heard it was 7 hours and 15 days.

All potatoes are mashed potatoes when you eat them.

SNL on Trump’s fake peace prize.

So, after 20 years of living in Germany I think I can sum up my thoughts and experiences and say, “Yeah, it’s alright. Think I’ll stay.” 🇩🇪

people having a go at taylor swift's music probably haven't even heard any of his songs

Anthony Gordon's dedication to recreating all of Princess Diana's iconic looks is to be admired

Schadenfreud: to derive enjoyment from mother people's misfortune

RECREATE that freeform jazz experience by throwing a squeaky toy into a tumble dryer, then stroking your chin and nodding.

A researcher for a 1930s street directory knocked on the Hulme front door of Matt Busby, then a Man City player, and asked his occupation. It appeared in the directory, due to his Lanarkshire accent, as 'fruit broiler'. (h/t Andy Spinoza, 'Manchester Unspun').

Fish & chips in a Hamburg institution.

George Best plays cricket with neighbours' kids while lodging on Aycliffe Avenue, Chorlton, Manchester, 1965. Photo Bill Cross.

That’s Ryanair for you, mate.

BOXING NEWS: A contract has been signed that will see the cast of Rainbow fight Ant and Dec in Kinshasa later this year. They're calling it Let's Get Ready to Rumble in the Jungle, Bungle.

Last day in my job today. 18 months of interesting work, well paid and near home. I am grateful.

10/10

There’s some work being done on a nearby railway line and every half an hour or so the warning system for the workers on the track blares out a horn to signal that a train is coming. It sounds like one of those annoying vuvuzela horns (world cup 2010. It’s kind of unsettling.

I liquidated my sympathy card company. Glad the whole sorry business is over.

ICE officers are the real undocumented people.

If like me you've ever been accused of being born in a barn and want to chat about it, remember: my door is always open.

Good one this 😂😂😂

The Schengen Agreement was signed on this day in 1985. Free movement across borders, alignment of visas. And while 11 of its 29 members currently see some form of border checks (thanks to cheap populist politics), the principle holds. Still a great, valuable achievement. #OTD

RIP Brian Wilson - undoubtedly one of the greatest song writers of the 20th century. www.theguardian.com/music/2025/j...

‘Back to the Future War’ #Terminator #BacktotheFuture

Syrian refugee, 19, praised after pinning down assailant in Hamburg knife attack

‘NO, I AM SPAR TACOS!’

Organised a date this weekend with a woman who identifies as a Wheelie Bin, but being a Bank Holiday weekend I can't remember if I'm taking her out tomorrow or Monday.

Well played Palace. Well deserved.

Ffs. Just realised Islam’s gonna have to give Catholicism a guard of honour this weekend

David Beckham (left)

BREAKING: early indications suggest that Reform UK voters are delivering a clear message in today’s local elections by eating all the pencils.

I launched my own fragrance yesterday. Luckily, I managed to waft most of it away before anyone else got in the lift.

Glückstadt, Schleswig Holstein. What a cute town. #germany

unfollowing everyone on linkedin except this guy

Minced lamb topped with whipped butterscotch dessert at night, shepherd’s delight.

Yep, it’s hard to disagree with this.

My old grandad abused alcohol for years. Mainly by saying “this wine is shit” in restaurants.

Roses are red, Violets are silly

“I've just injected steroids into my arm" "Anabolic?" "No, just my arm"

In the 80s nobody could have sex until someone started playing a saxophone.

Definitely him 🤔

FUCK YOU I WON’T DO WHAT YOU TELL ME, I sing as I put my meds in my pill sorter