I’m at the Newsroom in Milwaukee, where I have ordered “something whiskey sour-ish,” as I always do, and where I have also been delighted by this thing stuck on a post

I ate crackers in the bed today and Ryan didn't kick me out of it

Who are these seven people who liked that insane take downplaying Platner's abuses and assaults as "every day child abuse" Are they bots? Are they members of the somnambulist society? Are they addled? Do they have pudding in between their ears?

He might be a Nazi rapist but he's -our- Nazi rapist!

I've consumed a wasa cracker

are... are shoes not food?

In retrospect... being stuck in that traffic meant I was very close to home instead of nearly to my destination when tragedy struck.

WHAT A SHITTY DAY OFF

I have a million dollar business idea for anyone who wants to design equestrian shirts that have full coverage and are not made of micro plastics.

I'm attempting broth

This is an artist's rendering of how my morning went

someone should invent a president not in cognitive decline that we can have.

Kash Patel’s Eyes Fall Out

Omggggg I just got stuck in the worst fucking traffic and partway through realised I was going to throw up. You know that feeling when you hear your dog wretching and you jump out of bed to get them off the carpet? It was like that panic but a million times worse.

I'm glad the tree from the Last Unicorn finally found reciprocated love.

Nobody who has ever spent more than ten minutes around actual cows could possibly want anything to do with raw milk

he's gonna show up to his wrestling themed birthday party looking like this

Trump at the 250th party:

Mares: asking for a get together since yesterday afternoon, getting so excited to be put out together then:

Today is the day Elinor graduates from the 8th grade. Look at this kid!

Oh it's morning again didn't we do this yesterday

[Angelo Badalamenti music]

she was all nook no cranny

Smooth like eggs. Bet.

The balls on this guy

TAPPING THE SIGN

Today is already a pain.

This afternoon in my garden

THROW OUT SOME BREAD

Which holiday is this for? Our 250th?

Oh man

I posted this bc I don't quite know what to make of it, I was hoping some of you would weigh in.

The number of times someone has had to say this to me!

That's piss, girl

Crazy Vaclav's Discount Horse Sales Emporium Extravaganza! Prices so low, you'll lose your mind!

if your longtime woody lasts for 5 films or more, contact your physician

I need to be able to mute that horrific idiot grinning over his penis, I'm so tired of seeing that

Another 30 seconds of Daisy

I wonder what @weratedogs.com would rate this one

Not enough people have seen the coyote rolling around being sweet

This morning at work

People say he looks like a fascist vampire often but Stephen miller there actually is talking there with the same level of understanding of how a human body works that a very stupid vampire would have

The only way for them to learn is for them to be inside the rockets.

Flo Rida is actually scheduled to play Summerfest in Milwaukee on July 3, so countdown to that drop out