xian cochran
@melferburque.bsky.social
📤 1083
📥 801
📝 14835
weirdo in a weird land. commie pinko dirtbag. asexual. bipolar. he/him
pinned post!
other people after therapy | me after therapy
8 months ago
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don't threaten me with a good time
add a skeleton here at some point
about 5 hours ago
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xian cochran
Dan Larson
1 day ago
Microslop
add a skeleton here at some point
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xian cochran
Human Output Enthusiast
1 day ago
Barbra Streisand
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the little switch at the bottom of the rearview mirror for night driving is witchcraft. no one can explain it.
about 6 hours ago
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xian cochran
v e l o c i t y
3 days ago
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do we know how many venezuelans were murdered when they kidnapped maduro yet? dozens? hundreds?
about 11 hours ago
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ffs, trying to buy movie tickets in the regal app and there’s a $4 “booking fee”
about 15 hours ago
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xian cochran
Cody
about 16 hours ago
There were clues.
loading . . .
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Kat Abughazaleh
1 day ago
Tonight, the President of the United States has launched an unconstitutional war of aggression, dooming another generation to spill their blood for oil, and lay waste to a sovereign nation. I demand that Congress exercise its power, halt this conflict, and impeach this war criminal president.
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rubio really backtracked on “senile” quickly
about 16 hours ago
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xian cochran
Barred and Boujee aka Madiba Dennie
about 18 hours ago
Damn Reuters embarrassed itself and you so fast
add a skeleton here at some point
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xian cochran
chef tits
about 17 hours ago
Venezuela. Doesn’t. Even. Produce. Fentanyl.
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“there hasn’t been a murder in washington dc in 6 months” bish someone got murked last week
about 17 hours ago
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my initiative rolls tonight have been 2, 4, 8, 4 and 2. got the full bell curve of shit.
1 day ago
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*throwing the bard in the bag of holding to smuggle him past a checkpoint* it's not human trafficking! he's a gnome!
1 day ago
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I’m a terrible seattleite but the burgerville cheeseburger is better than a dicks cheeseburger
1 day ago
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xian cochran
sweetie π
1 day ago
*werner herzog voice* hamburger will never help you
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Jen (annoying one) 🍄
1 day ago
the title is totally innacurate. he gives up on battles after the first battle. they should have called this movie "one battle"
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once I cast “holy light” it’s over for you liches
1 day ago
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xian cochran
Mal
1 day ago
On a scale of delulu to labubu, how dumb are you trying to be?
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no cheating, reskeet with the most recent photo of your pet
add a skeleton here at some point
1 day ago
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xian cochran
Stephen Moran.
1 day ago
Mamdani has only been Mayor for a day & criminals are already fleeing New York
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convincing tourists that the gum wall in seattle is like the blarney stone and they have to lick it never gets old
4 days ago
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xian cochran
I’ll stop being cynical when I stop being right about the shit I’m cynical about
3 days ago
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xian cochran
I’m a shitposter, not a fighter
2 days ago
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xian cochran
little baby granny 🏳️‍⚧️
2 months ago
die techie scum* *this is german for "the techie scum"
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“twitter has gone the way of the mongoose” I’m sorry WHAT?
2 days ago
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what are the odds grubauer plays his way out of seattle? if he stays solid and the kraken don’t, they’d try to trade him right?
2 days ago
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if berkly catton starts popping off with a 27 on his back, I’ll have even less respect for mason marchment’s time in seattle.
2 days ago
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watched wake up dead man with my parents and now they just want to watch a bunch of murder porn and my mom was so disappointed when I told her I don't like crime dramas, I just watch comedies, sci-fi and cartoons. the world is too depressing already.
2 days ago
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xian cochran
little baby granny 🏳️‍⚧️
2 days ago
stranger things with candy
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xian cochran
Guillotine Hunger Force
2 days ago
andrew cuomo (in his bathroom, drunk, at 5am on new years day): mirror mirror on the wall, whos the mayorest of them all
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ugh my parents have motion smoothing turned on their giant tv, wake up dead man looks like shit
2 days ago
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xian cochran
tyler supreme
3 days ago
day one in mamdani’s new york
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lol my sister is going to the kraken game today, so sorry to miss her since I’m in vantucky. they’re staying right by my apartment.
2 days ago
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my mom hit an $11k jackpot on a slot machine last week, so the casino gave her a $125 voucher for the fancy seafood restaurant and a free night at the casino. they’re going back on her birthday sunday. must be nice.
2 days ago
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I’m a shitposter, not a fighter
2 days ago
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well, scratching toyota from potential cars to buy. this rental sucks. no carplay, you have to download their app. then register. then scan the VIN. which is peeled off in this car. I just want to listen to bluetooth, man. fuck this shit.
3 days ago
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the usual view from my front porch | tonight’s view from my front porch
3 days ago
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xian cochran
Tyler, from the Internet
about 2 years ago
Fred Durst was a huge Mario fan. He played every game in the series, and even wrote a song about how he did it all for tanuki
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really wish I knew what happened to my kraken winter classic sweater. I loaned it to someone and can’t remember who…
3 days ago
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my cop cousin gets so pissed every time I call his kid hamlet
3 days ago
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I’ll stop being cynical when I stop being right about the shit I’m cynical about
3 days ago
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ordered four things from amazon at work, they shipped three. try to tell them they shorted me, their stupid AI is like "okay we'll give you a refund for the whole thing" I even tried clarifying I was only missing one piece. it confirmed that. still credit the whole order.
4 days ago
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xian cochran
shauna
4 days ago
orcas have the chance to do the funniest thing
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Luke Steuber ✔️
11 months ago
Why would I spend $15 to go out and have Thai food when I can buy the ingredients for $30 and cook it myself and ruin it
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xian cochran
Craig Deeley
about 2 months ago
I’m eating for 2 now, according to the serving suggestion on the packet.
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euphoria is just a golden girls ripoff
4 days ago
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I want a statistic on how many people took the “seasoned” pathfinder feat after watching delicious in dungeon why don’t they keep track of shit like that?
4 days ago
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it’s weird that my tv gives me amazon delivery notifications even if I’m not on prime video
4 days ago
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