Happy John Brown’s Birthday to all who celebrate.

Random David Attenborough fact: he's the reason tennis balls are yellow.

happy Piccolo Day

"It'll be okay as long as we still push through a Democratic majority." No, bitch, it will not be okay. It will never be okay that Black Americans do not have a voice and have to depend on the kindness of strangers who have shown repeatedly that they do not give a shit about us in the voting booth.

Of course I wait until I get to work to take a shit. That's why it's called business hours. They're the hours you do your business.

Every time something bad happens in a Black or other POC majority city, you should see if that city is generally allowed to govern itself. There are so many cities that can’t, for example, ban guns because a Republican legislature was like nope in like, 1973.

My dumb ass son is lost in the ape maze again.

Y'know what really bugs me is, this would be an incredible shitpost if it wasn't made by this one exact asshole.

Man I hate it when there's exchange of fire during my ceasefire

Starting a podcast called The Old Man Yaoi Hour

Anyway, I don't think we need a strong Republican Party. Or even a Republican Party at all. It's okay for parties to die. For new parties to be created. They don't have to last forever. Show me one American Whig.

He really is a bad bunny. I don't think I've seen him hop even once.

Contractions with 3 words: -she'd've -wouldn't've Contractions with more than 3 words: -y'all'll've -they'dn't've

I don't know anything about football but this guy's head looks like it's on upside-down

Again this should inspire wall-to-wall media coverage for months. The crowning achievement of the Civil Rights Movement is dead. Black people just lost all of their remaining political power in the South. This is a monumental moment in American history that simply isn't being treated as such.

The movements of the celestial bodies through the heavens determines, quite rightly, when thou mayest eat thine wieners

I still remember the wave of bans because of "toasting in an epic bread." We're still posting, and he's dead now. We won.

Modern technology could learn from older stuff that does what it's supposed to and doesn't bother you. My toilet just works and never sends me emails like "Good news! Flush® is now Floosh®"

People are always blaming foreign labs for coming up with deadly viruses and conspiracy theorizing, but I dunno man, it really seems like cruise ships full of rich assholes are where the breakouts start.

Just partition the United States and let all the reactionary fuckheads have Utah or some shit and normal people who want something in exchange for their taxes besides death can live in the other part

Falco

Why is everyone talking about Starfox 64? What's going on? Is something wrong with the G-diffuser?

bill "bong" watterson

Once again we see The Phantom Menace was in fact the most realistic of the Star Wars movies. The taxation of trade routes. Unnecessary wars. Secret deals. George Lucas is entirely vindicated.

Played any good jarpigs lately?

JRPG is pronouced "jarpig"

It's also praxis

So who's gonna give all those talks now that Ted is gone?

CEOs are the biggest babies in existence. Just a bunch of googoo gaga diaper-shitters. Who also tell politicians what to do.

A powerful arifact. Levels of coolness too great for a mere mortal such as myself to hold.

getting ahead of this -- you do not, under any circumstances, need to "hand it to" candace owens, tucker carlson, MTG or any of these other freaks for starting to occasionally *say* the right thing & stay wary also keep them out of the goddamn tent

Met Gala is short for Metroid Galaxy, and boy are the attendees fucking up the cosplay. Samus never dressed like that.

These Met Gala outfits are getting ridiculous

They should have shown jar jar's dick

I very much do

Also Luke fucked the wampa

Giuliani is on his way to his hell, which is full of seasoned food and Black people who are being neither stopped nor frisked

So did he touch a crucifix or try to cross running water outside his coffin?

They should just be an airline for a few months each year, like their stores

one time when I was in university studying in the library there was a little hole in the drywall with an arrow that said “in here” and I looked in the hole and there was a folded up piece of paper that said “in here” and when I unfolded the paper a bunch of pubes fell out and it said “pubes”

Doing my PhD thesis on what is and isn't considered okay in fanfiction shipping

art should disturb the jagoffs and jack off the disturbed

2KILL 2MOCKINGBIRD