To the tune of temporary secretary: Dear sir or madam would you read my book, it took me years to write, wont you take a look

U2 won

cool that they make the black strats with white pickguards so people who pick mario in mario kart can have a guitar that won't overstimulate them

When you receive your transgender make sure to take proper care of them. Trans women need magic the gathering for enrichment and at least one synthesizer. Trans men need to be given a ukulele (accordion is also acceptable) and signed up for a kickball team. Consult a nonbinary with questions

Wherein the guy from Black Star is once again yelling online at girls I know. I can’t believe this is happening again. It’s been a decade! Why are you like this??

Santa knows when you're sleeping and he knows when you're awake. Judah Maccabee knows if you've been assimilating into the surrounding culture and he is NOT going to be okay with it

Mike love makes them say this on every flight

100 gecs

New song by The Strokes sounds great, love the retro midi vibes

i don't ever wanna feel/like a femmed-up gay take me to the orchi doc/take my balls away

🕯️Manifesting 🕯️

She granin on my gorki till i shagohod

I don't even see the code anymore, all i see is boymoder here, an eGirl over here

get back in your blue room, dumbass "Where is the outrage from the diaspora?" we're right here, get fucked. tldr; larry mullen sr ashamed

Hi I’m juli yes i know what Panavision is, no need to thank me

Librarian juli!!! Librarian juli!!!!

PER-FID-I-A BEVERLY HILLS REVOLUTIONARY THRILLS POPPIN PUSSY AND SHE KILLS I WILL DO SO AS SHE WILLS, YEAH, YEAH

remember that time when all the biggest posters on vine got together to demand a better site, twitter turned them down, they all left for youtube, and vine shut down shortly after? thinking of this for no raisin

Oooh it’s the harvest moon! Don’t forget to leave milk and cookies out for Neil Young tonight

im birthday juli now

👏 NO 👏 ROOTLESS 👏COSMOPOLITANS 👏

Someone didn’t read the fucking poem

Yall ever seen Oldboy? instead of staring into the magic mirror today, why not watch Oldboy instead? It is an incredible film, and it's fully watchable at this archive.org link! good quality, too!

what if we kissed on the pretty freight machine

shana tovah explicitly to my comrades who value palestinian life and no others, to be clear

oh shit, first of tishrei yall!!!! have you told your zionist relatives they don't deserve to be written in the book of life next to palestine yet?

wise words

sure, but do you remember the 22nd day of September? happy bday homogenic u rule

bro

Engagement bait! Show me your lighters! I know they’re next to you anyway

Accidentally texted my fiancee about “Haman Karen” and now I’m just imagining her demanding to speak to the manager of Tigerbaum

my 9 year old, under his breath, "I would never be a scab."

time to trot this one out again

Emma's house is empty, so why do I call it Emma's house?

That's so cool that you have a favorite movie that brings you so much joy! "Wet Hot American Summer" sounds like such a fun and relatable movie. It's awesome that you found something you connect with so deeply! I'm also a big movie fan, it's so fun to discover movies that you love! 🥰

wet hot american summer is my favorite movie? tough to say because i'm a movie liker, but certainly no comedy is more fondly held in my heart. did i know i needed a jewish summer camp satirical sex comedy? no! but oh man did i relate to it.

i oopsie let my weed card expire and it's not here yet. additionally, i absolutely cannot find the last jar i bought. FML MLIA?

I preferred it when he just fought daleks

one day we'll have an official ordered list of transgendereds from the most to the least valid, we just have to discourse a little longer

she cry on my wolf til i consequence downstream

Shoutout to Adrianne Lenker for writing a song about being 33, haven’t had a song about the age i am since i was 25 (carved with a butter knofe, fyi)

I got tricked and I’m about to take a new id photo without shaving first

wise words