First day on the job and you want respect? Go right up to the most recognizable and respected guy in the newsroom and have him yell at you until you cry. Then it's time to send him a weepy email telling him how disappointed you were that he did all that. Shouldn't have any trouble after that.

I will convert to whichever political party or religion or cult destroys the concentration camps oppressing my people

this photo received the exceptionally rare "Tri-Young" award

he's right. three times is enemy action

cutting brake lines is mostly movie-plot stuff, but this here represents a different kind of threat

only two years ago they still had to write "only the young" in small print

I like that his proof that he was "where he was supposed to be" is just that he was physically close to Trump, like some kind of personal bodyguard instead of the Secretary of State

SpaceX employees are the enemy. They are part of the Epstein class. SpaceX employees want to take advantage of YOUR retirement accounts to cash THEM out. Fuck SpaceX

The entire reason AI is being deployed in schools is to funnel money out of schools and into tech companies. Whatever reasons you've convinced yourself that AI edtech is necessary, regardless of how "useful" you think it is, it's sole purpose is to pad the pockets of the wealthy.

This is the “I have money to give away on Twitter” guy lmao

it's so funny that people will still seriously say "never bet against Elon" when this nightmare exists

Apparently this was not a sophisticated hack. But engineers at Instagram going overboard to use AI for everything, and having no incentives for stuff like… security. Inside the security org. You get what you incentivize. A warning for any company wanting to copy Meta…

cocaine is inherently right-wing, because its culture is one of scarcity

just think of it as a preemptive strike

We Rate Dogs is a good dude. The internet got lucky with him.

Hmm, I posted "who do you have to kill to become a partner at A16Z?" and YouTube has had the video under review (but... not blocked?) for an hour now. I suppose accurately describing their business policies violates some algorithm? www.youtube.com/shorts/9xciZ...

🚨 Heartbreaking. Detainees at Delaney Hall are being forced to eat worm-infested food, denied doctors, and separated from their families. Even US citizens are trapped inside. This must end. No more torture centers on American soil. #ShutDownDelaneyHall

I think this is my favorite part from Kash Patel’s girlfriend Alexis Wilkins’ lawsuit against MS NOW.

There’s a shortage of slapping the shit out of people and we need a market correction on that.

I served with lots of Platners. I’ve met him hundreds of times. A lot of y’all are about to look real stupid when the September & October surprises start dropping. Everything so far is the tip of the iceberg. It’s only going to get worse from here. There will be lots of crow on the menu.

"lie back and think of America"

GOOD NEWS FOLKS: YOU CAN BUY THIS STICKER NOW I recommend the 6x6 inch one for your car as always, 50% of proceeds go to the Transgender Law Center cara-junes-stuff.myshopify.com/products/die...

it's obviously just compulsive at this point. there's no other reason for Trump to be making illegal trades for less than 0.001% of his net worth

oh, THAT kind of oyster farming

but he tried to cover it up, and isn't that really what matters?

Is the scandal that he's in an age appropriate relationship?

if we're not nicer he's going to take his ballroom and go home

great stuff, google. There seem to be a handful of different types of response available by reloading, all of them wrong, and with the specific days it chooses varying randomly www.google.com/search?q=how...

see then i thought THIS must be a photoshopped joke. but i asked google the question 3 times in a row and behold: the saturfish cometh

she bursts into tears, "but doctor, I am the great clown Magamacci!"

oh no, his girlfriend is gay too

won't someone think of the revenue??

as someone who has been told repeatedly to use AI just for the sake of using AI, lmao

well, you got the "derail" part right

THE NAME IS MOST EMPHATICALLY NOT THE THING. -- John Gall, "The Systems Bible"

This guy terrorized our city, now appears on Alex Jones' two-bit closet Twitter podcast, and is responsible for several deaths of American citizens and injuries of countless others. Justice starts with him in jail.

I love how Elon Musk is an object lesson in how having everything leaves you with nothing.

Two of the creepiest men on the planet have hot takes on masculinity. Pull up a seat, everyone! Cover your drinks, ladies.

this is what Twitter is for now, this is what you legitimize by posting there

"doctor, it hurts when I occupy Ukraine"

loving how 7 of those 9 acts figured this out before they ended up standing behind the president, lending their endorsement to war, theft, and fascism. they're clearly all smarter than Mark Cuban

I don't think apple wants you to know this (because it keeps turning off) but you can put an iphone into low power mode anytime and it's kind of great? everything is a little slower, the battery lasts much longer, it turns off sooner if you get distracted by something in the real world, etc.

it just doesn't work for me unless he actually sits in the chair

Called this back in October

this partially successful launch paves the way for future advances in cost reduction and rocket reusability

my heart aches for our country. but this content is incredible

guys I just tried googling this to find the exact Andor quote and jesus fucking christ guys what the fuck is happening here

there won't be any performers at Trump's 250th, but your ticket still gets you dinner