Okay I just saw the Mitch McConnell fake photo. I heard about it hours ago but I didn't even look look into it because I knew it was going to be fake. But be fucking for real you think I'm going to believe an octogenarian man was in the hospital for a month and is just chilling in a button down?!

I've genuinely seen no gamers more grateful to be physical game owners in this troubling month than Nintendo gamers. We truly have been collecting them for so long and we fully own the collections we've been building over the years. It's both relieving and incredibly valuable to have these days.

Just catching up on the things Jay Z said on stage and needed to highlight my continuously correct opinions.

I see that now that Graham has expired so have the NDAs lol

"and I took that personal"

Brought to you by Adderall and THC

I cannot with the internet today 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

This deserves more applause. I understand the gay war gnome is dead but I saved $300!

Just acquired a brand new Revair for only a hundred bucks. Love OfferUp.

I know that the city of San Antonio does not work fast enough to remove roadkill from the street the way that they've been removed from my neighborhood and it's deeply concerning to me where the roadkill is going.

they’ve been passing the video from the Ring around the Senate

This country celebrates death everyday. This isn’t the flex people think it is.

I sincerely hope Lindsey did one decent thing and left some funds to his favorite sex workers.

BREAKING: Lindsey Graham’s sudden death reveals everyone’s wake-up time on Sundays.

Just realized what needs to be on the playlist today Alexa, play Down with The Sickness.

To be a historian is to speak ill of the dead and the rest of you should take more history classes and join us.

Old white men are taking hella L's this weekend 😂

The fascist project potentially being brought to a stuttering halt because its biggest enablers are ancient, dust-filled windbags who die in office is possibly the funniest thing that could happen to this decrepit republic

The amount of people responding to Lindsey Graham's family asking for prayers with our prayers were already answered is killing me...but only metaphorically. The prayers actually killed Lindsey.

Unfortunately I think the organization I work for would just like my posts on main.

And somehow Chuck Grassley is still fucking alive.

The fact that we don't have a solid count is crazy 😭

*pinches bridge of nose, eyes closed, takes a deep breath* so do we have ANY idea how many living US Senators there are right now?

remember, be careful what you post on a day like this. If you do it right, you can get illegally fired for being disrespectful to Lindsay Graham and then win a massive lawsuit about 10 months from now and retire with 2 million in your pocket

Me all day:

Contestant: I’ll take before and after for $1200. Ken Jennings: This man shows that, while acceptance of white nationalism in US Senate candidates is not equally distributed between the parties, it is, to a nonzero extent, bipartisan.

It would’ve been even cooler if someone had put that bison in the ring with Conor McGregor

Not Lindsey Graham on camera being asked about Mitch and saying he's gonna "go check right now" I'M SCREAMING. Please more Republican senators need to check on Mitch McConnell in person!

I just saw a video of them lowering the flag to half mast at the White House for Lindsey Graham and the White House is covered by a like Looney Toons acme purchase of a backdrop to look like the White House.... The metaphors are metaphoring.

I actually don't even know how to celebrate this death it wasn't in my top most anticipatory. I'm very happy but caught off guard!

Today is a great reminder that we can never be too ready.

Lindsey and Mitch recording their album

At this point I think the Grim Reaper is blindfolded and throwing darts and I'm appreciating where they're landing but let's go for the bullseye bud.

Look at you! You outlasted Lindsey Graham.

God killing Lindsey Graham when we were all waiting for Mitch McConnell.

mitch mcconnell snatching lady g up so they can hop in the HOV lane to hell...

You're going to get left behind if you don't use Al." Leave me then. Leave me with my critical thinking skills, my ability to read and write long- form, and books without needing Al summaries.

The Grim Reaper strolling Capitol Hill like…

The most un-likable men are going to connect with this post spiritually “I want her to like me for me”….You present as someone that’s impossible to enjoy being around. You’re not kind and she doesn’t feel free around you…but you want her to dig to find some type of shiny gem inside. Be likeable

i love social media when a renowned bitch dies 😭😭

Lindsey Graham is having a 20-minute conversation right now with Mitch McConnell

Lindsey Graham has died. He is being remembered for the way he lived . If you do not wish to be mocked when dying , do not make your dying the only way vulnerable people can find peace

I would have to become a recluse. I'm changing my phone number and deleting all my social media. Nobody I know will ever see or hear from me again so that I do not have to talk about this 😭

"Tributes Pour In for Senator Lindsey Graham", then a dramatic blank space on the landing page of NYT.

We’re all mortal and we’re all gonna be remembered for how we treated people and the kind of world we participated in making. It’s a pretty basic but essential lesson that many won’t learn this side of the sod.

This is the first thing I saw waking up today 🤣🤣 This is gonna be a good week!