I heard there's a guy TLC warned us about who's editing Zack Braff and Donald Faison's doctor show that's returning who is wearing a cloth medical uniform while sitting in a bath in bushland getting his back cleaned It's a scrub scrubbing Scrubs in scrubs getting scrubbed in the tub in the scrub

ME: *sneezes* TURKEY: gobbless you

Them: Hi Grae, what are you up to? Not making anything cursed I hope! Me: uhhhhhhhh

Seems kind of sketchy to me that the only reason the US isn't in recession right now is because of an industry that can only exist through extraordinary levels of copyright violation and theft which is currently in a massive unsustainable bubble

Feeling like something sweet after dinner, realising my parents gave me an advent calendar on the weekend that's in my fridge... & there is chocolate behind those flimsy cardboard windows... & who would know if I perhaps opened one or two of those windows a little early? Who would know indeed...

Gonna start calling all the fake foreign MAGA accounts "Paidtriots"

You're not special Nintendo Switch 2, and Steamdeck I also need to be hand-held and consoled

Housemate left for work at 06:00 but knowing it was going to be hot put on their AC & and left their door open so the apartment, the cats, & myself wouldn't overheat Well now it's midday & it's so cool inside while being hot & gross outside That's the most considerate frkn thing I'm so fortunate 💖

Me: Help, I'm being haunted by a cruel ghost! Buddy: A cruel ghost? Me: A cruel ghost Buddy: How is it a cruel ghost? Me: It's just mean spirited

Sometimes late at night I lie awake worrying that The Venga Bus is not actually coming, that it may never be coming

watching a late night History Channel "documentary" about how it was actually aliens who introduced MLMs to earth because there's no way humans could have created pyramid schemes on their own

when your ADHD meds kick in before you finish eating breakfast so now you're sitting there staring at your food like it's made of rocks, and not even particularly interesting rocks

Most accounts on Twitter turn out to be Russian MAGA bots. Here’s why Bluesky has an intellectual diversity problem

currently processing the trauma... of having to go to the grocery store to pick up a few things sometime today

My mum turned 80 just these last few days. I'm not sure I'd have survived without family support, and it began with her. Here she is when she found a goat and brought it home. Because "I found a goat! look!" is a perfectly normal thing to do.

Fornix. Uropygium. Flocculation. Meatus. Fistula. Gonopore. Scrofula!

Wankel rotary engine.

What's a word that sounds dirty to you but actually isn't? I'll start: fecundity

When someone needlessly brings up god respond with "Oh, the character from that bible book?" to make them as uncomfortable as they just made you

if I had fuck off money I'd obviously help as many people as possible but I'd also buy Trump's links course in Scotland that he loves so much and replace each flag on each hole with a windmill, hire only immigrants to work there, and rename it The Golf of Mexico

Wouldn’t it be some shit if a white supremacist took the 14 words seriously? “Oh shit, if we’re gonna secure a future for white people, we’re gonna need public healthcare, clean air, drinkable water, affordable housing…”

The DVD to streaming journey: When we had nothing we'd watch almost anything Now we've got everything it's hard to watch anything

Anytime any maga speaks to you, for any reason, just snap “quiet piggy” back at them. Nothing else, just “quiet piggy”.

the epstein files (donalds version)

"All of my lakes, gone" - the US after being infected with AI data centres

In an effort to save time and money, Republicans release Epstein Files printed on black paper

"My Stack" is Trump's pet name for Bill Clinton

The best possible outcome AI Gen can offer is it tricks you into believing a person made the thing - then later you learn it was generated by an LLM & you're left with the feeling of being tricked, of being had by some asshole oligarch techbro & their theft bot There is nothing good about this

religion try to survive without parents brainwashing their young children into it and threatening them with shunning if they resist challenge level: impossible

"she shall be our Daywalker!" "...you mean someone who can stop by the pharmacy for your SSRIs during business hours?" *Happy emphatic nodding*

The doctor said I needed to switch to a high fibre diet so I ate my hemp cargo pants

A good buddy just asked if I could photoshop the poster for the movie Fall into a "Fell For It Again" meme so I did and here it is

Yep, now you can't even call new tech an upgrade, because it's almost always worse in some way thanks to enshittification, thanks to techbro greed bsky.app/profile/grae...

I miss when technology used to be fun.

Over and over again.

One of my friends recently got a job at a grocery coop and I'm supporting her as best I can

Teenagers are old enough to have sex with middle aged men. They are not old enough to be trans. by Megyn Kelly

I read that Trump and his cronies have done such a terrible job of managing the US economy that America is now penniless

www.youtube.com/watch?v=IXIs... NEW VIDEO!

You know what? FUCK YOU! *Undashes your habers*

I hope when the AI bubble bursts Sam Altman rightly gets convicted of fraud and thrown in jail where his only companion is a chatbot that's been trained solely on Ed Zitron's posts

I need to touch grass so bad, yesterday as the sun was rising and streaming into my room I said "ew, light mode" and closed the blinds

CONSERVATIVES: same sex marriage is an abomination against God ALSO CONSERVATIVES: age is just a number and that number is 15 for us

So you're telling me even though they're called peanuts, I'm supposed to believe that this whole time they've actually been a legume? They sound like a conspiracy nut

oh no... I forgot I put teeth on my boomerang. I hope that doesn't come back to bite me

*hits blunt* who knew it'd start with an online terminal, and end with us being terminally online?

After their upcoming event at The White House, Trump and White will announce plans to add 3 more sides to The Pentagon to make it the new home of the UFC