More importantly, Tupperwhen?

Something I have learned from all of this: at some point, if every personality trait, every incompetent decision, every divisive utterance is awful, pettiness doesn't even register.

*CONFERENCE ROOM IN SEATTLE* JERRY DIPOTO (Timothy Olyphant?): My anaconda don’t want none… OLDHEAD SCOUTS: *visibly confused* DIPOTO: *sigh* My anaconda don’t want none, *DAN* ASSISTANT GM DAN (Sir Mixalot): Your anaconda don’t want none unless he’s got buns, sir DIPOTO: Unless he’s got buns

I just hope the entire story of my death is not how people reacted to my death.

Williams was a photographer for Jet magazine. He took the photo himself. The OG selfie. Iconic. Orangeburg, South Carolina, 1956

Cade Horton is for real.

I took a lot of positives from tonight's Bears game. Example: I'm a lot positive they aren't very good at the moment.

So I've decided to do a subscription sale for the home stretch, with 25% off the annual price. I'm calling it the "Home Stretch 25% off Subscription Sale." My refusal to read even a single marketing book saves you money!!! www.cupofcoffeenews.com/the-home-str...

It is a very bad sign that nobody has to use any word other than some form of "Happen" and every fucking person on the planet knows exactly what is being talked about.

chicago is hands down the best place i’ve ever lived and people react to it like you said you lived in mordor. meanwhile there are people who willingly live in st. louis

Unbelievable that the team with the 2nd best record in baseball is also the one of the worst. Hard to square.

Top of the ninth and I have a bad feeling about Palencia today.

Disappointed that the Cubs aren't rocking this look today. Should have went for the full look instead of half-assing it with the ugly home blues.

If you ever feel guilty for posting about your little hobbies or some small joy or a goofy joke because the world has ghastly things in it, I am here to tell you PLEASE DO NOT STOP. A slender membrane shields me from despair at any given moment & your silly little posts are all that sustains it

When he got high, sometimes, Ozzie Osborne would shoot birds and small animals for fun. What a guy.

Baseball is just so stupid most of the time yet I let it occupy a LOT of space in my mind.

This is where I post from.

Local man's presentation fails snake deterrence.

Don’t send me an unsolicited picture of your peewee cocktapus unless you want me to… A: find your mom’s Facebook B: find a picture she uploaded of you reminiscing about what a nice young man you were C: badly photoshop that into a locket D: convince you I’m your daughter. Happy Father’s Day Daddy.

Sophie and Colin Hortman, the children of Minnesota Rep. Melissa Hortman and her husband, Mark, have released a statement regarding their parents' death:

Some of y'all can't handle 2 high agency males going at it and really shows.

Another free draft for the person who goes in dressed like this:

"Hey, Jimmy ... how long has this peas porridge been in this pot?" "I dunno ... nine days?"

I'm going to go ahead and sing the song.

More like Elly De La Cruise amiright?

I lost Randall as a follower here and I am relatively devastated.

Every year on Memorial Day, I share this video of French caretakers who take sand from Omaha Beach in Normandy, and scrub them into the letters to give them the gold coloring. They do this for all 9,386 US soldiers who died. France also gave us this land as American soil.

When your mom fixes you a plate at Old Country Buffet

PCA might be a religion.

This is just bad managing. If you give up a hit to Vidal Brujan you should be removed from the game.

Justin Turner? No shit?

Apropos of nothing, the Burger King Original Chicken Sandwich is probably the most underrated fast food sandwich.

Ryan Pressly ain't it.

watching baseball @jonbois.bsky.social

any excuse to repost the greatest Tetris story ever, when a reporter went to cover early e-gaming championships and discovered that his wife was unknowingly *the world's greatest Tetris player* by a huge margin archive.boston.com/news/globe/m...

The average American has three friends

Folks, @mrgeorgewallace.bsky.social is a national treasure and all of us are fortunate to live at the same time as him.

This is what Beck meant by "forces of evil in a bozo nightmare."

if you see this post a poet

The only thing better than. Being the first car on the ferry is being the last car on the ferry.

Post a movie from the year you turned 18 (that would be hard to explain to people that weren’t there)

The hard truth is that there are some products you just can't make in America. These must be imported from elsewhere. Like chocolates, for example. American workers will always become overwhelmed by the speed of the conveyor belt. They'll end up shoving the sweets into their mouths and blouses

Rally Goose!!

This is the one newsletter I read every morning. I can't recommend Cup of Coffee enough for the perfect blend of Yesterday in Baseball highlights and What Fresh Hell Is Being Foisted Upon Us Now news updates.

My wife spilled almost a full bag of tortilla chips on the floor and my girl cat sauntered up on the pile like she was bellying up to a surprise late night nacho bar. I've never been prouder.

So we were watching a colorized video of Chicago in 1930 and ... um ... I think I found the guy who invented "Deez Nuts"

I don't want to say the Schumer optics are bad but Gavin Newsom just invited him on his podcast.

It really is difficult right now to not just collapse into a pit of despair, but I refuse to. I will fall into a ditch of hopelessness and fear.