And now you’ll see a group historically known as unicorn hunters, whose defining trait is an enduring interest in a figure that declines inclusion in their ecosystem.

PSA

How dare we?

1/2 Adopting Man Babies: Baby Joe 🍼 *For legal reasons baby Joe has had his face censored with the addition of some bad boy sunglasses and a mustache.

ʎuɹoH History: Thanksgiving, The Violence They Called Providence 𝘐𝘵’𝘴 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭 𝘩𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘺, 𝘢𝘴 𝘵𝘰𝘭𝘥 𝘣𝘺 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘥𝘶𝘥𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘮𝘺 𝘪𝘯𝘣𝘰𝘹 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘮𝘦. More on this linked in the comments. ♥️ New here? Hi I’m Brooke and I tell the right-wing men in my inbox history until they no longer wish to ‘date’ me. 😉

My very pale skin and I are on a family trip. Should the sharks claim me, let the men in my inbox know I slipped beneath the waves carrying no longing for them into the deep.

Happy International Men’s Day!

WOW. 102 children have already received $50 worth of gifts from our holiday mutual aid. But, there are so many more on this post, and more still waiting to be added. I need you all to do me a favor. Can you please share the post so that more people know this is happening? Links below👇

1/2 Someone asked me why my satirical conservative profile has her job listed as gay animal conversion therapy. This is why. 😉

Christian men are ALWAYS in my inbox worrying about the starving, tirelessly advocating for the hungry. 🙏🏻 THIS is Christianity. Don’t let anyone tell you anything different.

It’s starting to feel like I’m the only one who hasn’t blown Bill Clinton.

After you laugh, read this. 👇

Cheating men slide into my inbox to bring me their wives, I assume. (Most of my posts come from a satirical Facebook profile of me as a conservative, but this creature found the real me.)

Ennui 💖

😏😏😏

This is hands down my favorite right-wing tantrum about Mamdani.

They’re turning the plants into biochemical factories that use sunlight to convert carbon dioxide and water into glucose while releasing oxygen into the atmosphere. ‼️

Just Halloween girly things. 👻

1/2 Every October, we play at fear, but beneath the masks and costumes, there are real stories behind the Halloween tales we tell for fun. This is a true story of exorcisms. Content warning: This story includes sexual assaults committed by Christian men in positions of religious authority.

I’m learning to play the organ :)

Teeth teeth teeth teeth

It’s Bisexual Visibility Day. If you can see me, you must be bi. 😉

I can’t prove it, but the signs point to Tylenol being behind Jimmy Kimmel’s return.

So fragile

1/2 Why must this man doom the world eternally with his ruinous appendage?

Oh my love, one thing I will say about the alleged Tyler Robinson confession texts is that the prosecutors have managed to unite the right and left together in a shared conviction that they don’t believe a 22 year old man fucking texts like that.

Aletta Jacobs was born in 1854, but her ideas and actions are far more progressive than so many people’s of today. This next guy joins us to get a picture of me. Or, I mean, learn about Aletta. Full post: open.substack.com/pub/brookete...

When my employer learns that I “celebrated” murder with eloquence, daring to raise my voice against the violence of guns, my ruin will be certain. 😔

I drove my daughter and her friends to Fright Fest, and while I was half-lost in my audiobook, I noticed their conversation turn to Charlie Kirk. My daughter said she hopes he’s looking up at us right now. 🥹 Sometimes parenting pays off in the strangest, most satisfying ways. #ProudMomMoment

This feisty one messaged the page for history, I assume.

“I think it’s worth it. I think it’s worth to have a cost of, unfortunately, some gun deaths every single year so that we can have the Second Amendment.” Charlie Kirk, 2023

This one was my very first pyramid scheme, boss babe troll.

This guy’s mom wanted me to tell him about Operation Ranch Hand. ♥️ New here? Hi I’m Brooke and I harass the right-wing men in my inbox with history until they no longer wish to ‘date’ me. 😉 I do not know these men, and my messages come from a satirical Facebook profile of me as a conservative.

At last I shall be cured!

1/3 Labor Day is stained with blood, born from the cries of workers who rose against their chains and were cut down in return. Today I want to share two important labor history stories. You can catch the second story, and this one in more detail, on my Substack linked in the comments.

almost there America 🥰 🇺🇸🤞🏻

Can he please just do it already because I need an occasion to buy a cake.

I’m getting married to this guy’s son!

1/2 LADIES: Get yourselves a good man who reads the Bibel

Yes, Gavin Newsom’s social media team’s trolls are hilarious. But I’m also a hilarious troll, AND I don’t have a history of punishing homeless people or platforming and agreeing with transphobic right-wing bigots. Put me on the ballot.

I’m getting adopted! 🥰🙏🏻 #blessed

Flapper headbands are an under-rated fashion accessory. Bad hair day? Didn’t shower? Have a pimple right in the middle of your cheek? Babe, that’s not a problem. That’s a job for a flapper headband. Do it for yourself, but also do it for me. I need these to come back so my kids think I’m cool.

1/2 On my quest to find a high-value Alpha, I decided to give portions of the 1917 Army Alpha intelligence test to a sampling of bigoted right-wing men. And just so we’re abundantly clear, I’m intentionally borrowing the language of the eugenicists who invented these tests.

Do men even send funny pictures anymore?

It’s the delusion that counts.♥️

The map to love has been drawn for me at last, and it leads somewhere I cannot follow.

1/2 ʎuɹoH History: Edith Cowan It’s real history, as told by some dude in my inbox and me.

June: They don’t need a month, nobody’s coming for them. A few months later: We’re coming for them.