sleeping like a little angel dreaming demon dreams

women are not your property, just fyi (unless they agree to it, that’s different)

saw something that hurt my feelings but i’m so high i forgot what it was. now i’m just eating my little snacks.

Follow me for more hopeless yearning and absurd shit

every spoonful of lucky charms i eat makes me feel like i’m feeding the child version of myself in a parallel timeline

hey (with the intention of crying when you ignore me)

i need to invest in a spray bottle for when you guys act out

Girls who listen to smut in the car go to heaven

Hey gorgeous wanna come back to my place drink some dollar store wine while we try to hit it big on some 1$ scratch offs I got with my workers comp?

shhhhhh (while patting your head)

i need another bump* *sniff of his armpit

i don’t have the mental capacity to learn a new social media

she’ll be cummin around the mountain when she cums 🎶

him: ur not like other girls, ur bad me: *distraught* what him: no like… naughty me: *starting to cry* i didnt even do anything him: what is happening right now me: *uncontrollable sobbing*

you give me the yuck, that’s worse than the ick

hey (with the intention of going to the bookstore together)

we go together like kink and mental disorders

i would actually rather do anything else than go to work

my dear friend wants to learn quilting. and it makes you realize that don’t make hobbies like they used to. everything now is just “doomscrolling” and “posting through it.” at least grandma’s cross-stitch says “bless this mess” instead of “i crave the sweet release of the algorithm.”

@littlelemontart.being.baby got out of jail and uhh she got some ink in there

Ten piping hot fresh problems?? Who ordered the ten piece problems tray???

i’ve had time to think about what i did and you know what? i’d do it again

what do you call something that is so terrible that you just can’t stop watching?

exchanging increasingly specific hypotheticals as foreplay

i love when women are weird n freaky n perverted and just don’t hide it

Can I come over and look at you like this?

one with the couch

does this joint make me look high?

I wish I could tell little me who struggled to have friends that I'd grow up to be surrounded by friends that are full of nothing but love. like genuinely the greatest and funniest people on earth who deserve everything

weilding you like a specimen

i’m cuddly and curious like a kitten but unlike a kitten i scoop my own litter box 💅

😎

each time one of you deactivates an angel loses its wings

my turn

oh no i sure would hate for someone to take advantage of me

i’m so sorry i can’t follow you back. i have a medical condition where taylor swift makes me violent.

oh no i said something mean abt ur favorite billionaire

you make me want to scoop my eyeballs out with a metal spoon

if ur new here, so am i. i don't know what i post sorry

[seeing your dick for the first time] MAMMA MIA Olive Garden's never-ending soup or salad and breadsticks 🤌

me reading a book while i ignore all of my responsibilities

girl who wears revealing clothes because she actually does want you to objectify her

always together, never apart, best friends at heart @strawbbfields4ever.bsky.social

hey baby wanna meet up at the gas station sushi restaurant

queen of self destructive behavior

singing tainted love in the subaru dealership

you're so sweet lemon you're like my knight in shining armor who I kiss secretly under the moonlight to hide it from my homophobic king of a father

it triggers me when i can feel the glitter in my lip gloss