one of the weirder parts of this wave of total surrender of core civil liberties is there is no fucking reason for it. no world war 2, not even a 9/11. we're just bored and mad

I love hearing people’s takes on why ONE BATTLE AFTER ANOTHER is bad, because no art is truly impeachable and all opinions are equally valid, unless you have a blue check on Twitter in which case haha eat my shit you fuckass

Trump Spends Entire U.K. Trip Trying To Figure Out Where He Knows Prince Andrew From

THE LONG WALK SPOILERS There’s a guy who shits himself, we see his full butthole while doing this, and then he gets shot in the head. He has no lines and I’ve never seen this actor before.

To the tune of “Owner of a Lonely Heart”:

man they really didn't give a shit about that guy. as soon as it was clear they couldn't use his death to launch a purge they started to treat it like a nothingburger

Most Eddington-coded part of the whole thing

dan bongino and kash patel lying unconscious on the ground after bonking their heads together as they both bent down to examine what is later determined to be their own footprints

Lose weight? Why, so I can shave and look like Dane DeHaan?

no offends if this is you but if you're thinking "this is going to make the right do fascism" they're already there. they blew up a boat with 11 people on it for being immigrants. they're kidnapping US citizens and trying to rendition them to Uganda. do you think we're on a trajectory to peace

Don't you all realize what this means? The right will begin a systematic and extralegal oppression of their political enemies and vulnerable populations. This is the first thing I saw on the news after waking up from a 25-year coma.

Look, I voted for the military takeover of cities, the extrajudicial imprisonment of made-up enemies, a return to a culturally brutal time for everyone I hate, and the total collapse of our economy. But this Epstein stuff is not remotely a crossed line. I love it. I'm 48% of the country btw

walk

Looking like he was visited by the ghost of Labor Day past and got the shit kicked out of him by a bunch of teamsters

Nope, too many jokes in a row about him being dead, now he’s got to be alive.

I think it’s cool that we made a machine that gives entire towns asthma so it can turn your uncle into the dad from Frailty

"please bro get two monitors, it improves your editing workflow i'm so serious please bro"

A movie I’ve always wanted to see: A real-time backstage drama a la Saturday Night, but counting down to the Atlanta premiere of Gone With the Wind. Read up on it to see why

EDDINGTON: as an editor I appreciated how shitty the crossfades were in Pedro Pascal's re-election ad

Dems should lean into sneering cosmopolitan elitism imo

An article about horror directors' mommy issues would have gone so hard in 2017 if they picked the right buzzword for it. Momsplaining? Manic Pixie Scream Girls? Oh well. Lost to time

With any luck

Happy M8/1 day! Celebrate with your favorite cosplay and quotes from the iconic film that started it all. #SaylesAdult #JustMatewanThings

Based on how old our parents looked in their 30s and how old we look in ours, I'm gonna say whatever the microplastics are doing is working

i debated 100 six-year-olds about whether or not im Mr. Stinky

(Playing the guitar part to Glycerine, singing shirtless to thousands) Mr. Bean

I feel like all I need to hear about EDDINGTON is “it’s the first 30 minutes of BEAU IS AFRAID” and I’m there opening day

this is genuinely true. MAGA’s Epstein conspiracism exists in large part because it’s a mystery box. the more specific the allegations get, the more you’ll see them pivot to defending Trump

Labubus are Funko Pops for people on SSRIs [DISCLAIMER: This would do serious numbers if account had 24K followers. Thank you for your attention on this matter]

I know there’s no better time to reach out to MAGA family members who are feeling disenfranchised about Trump burying the Epstein list. That said, I paid for this light-up dirigible with the words EAT SHIT TODD and I can’t get a refund

Unfortunately, the list of famous pedophiles was given to the most famous pedophile in the world. Officials say “This is the one thing we didn’t want to happen.”

Every day I wake up and do my daily affirmations. What’s my letterboxd top 4 on the red carpet. What am I picking in the Criterion closet video. How much of a piece of shit do I have to be to get there. 45 pushups. Day begins

The thing Starship Troopers doesn’t get is that its vile, fascist newsmedia doesn’t also have fun games to play like Spelling Bee or Connections

[steve brule turning on his stadium mic] uhhh fralse shart. Offrense. [stadium starts booing] Nine of grass penaltry, still uh, still…play pigskrin

Laura Loomer Be Uglier Outside Than Inside Challenge [IMPOSSIBLE]

I know the DNC wants its own Joe Rogan, not a socialist mayor. But give Zamdani a chance, he might have four unbelievably terrible stand-up specials in him

So is it a bluesky etiquette thing to reskeet someone, then immediately quote skeet their skeet with your own skeet? I’m just getting skeeted on and don’t care for it

why is the president the only person testing the limits of his power? everyone should see what they can get away with. what if zookeepers gave helicopters to gorillas? nobody has tried this

I stayed up nights for years programming Waymos to feel pain but it was worth it

Who’s going to tell them

I must admit I’m entertained by the sheer volume of instagram reels I’m fed, which show in great detail how Benny Blanco created so many disposable piece of shit songs I don’t care about

Snow White bombing but Lilo & Stitch succeeding will change the future of Disney liveslop, and not necessarily in a bad way. For example I think a remake of Pocahontas could absolutely use a gremlin who misinforms the audience about Medicare

You know how MCUification made any piece of shit movie from the 20th century look good because it is on film and is lit on purpose? I think that people who are raised on demonic undulating AI vids will find solace in the handmade human touch of Spiderman and Elsa costume/nursery rhyme CGI videos

My 1st time in Japan, long ago, we saw this guy driving a tiny lil custom truck, singing a phrase through a loudspeaker. The melody was gentle, spiritual. We asked our translator “What’s he singing?” She said “He’s saying ‘baaaaked potaaatoooo.’ It is baked potato truck.” I think about that a lot.