We also have our past xmas card, Valentine's card, and sticker for sale in the etsy shop I forgot we had!!! www.etsy.com/your/shops/T... Reminder that you can also support us by nodding thoughtfully in what you assume is our direction.

RIP henry kissinger. Never *felt* someone getting dragged screaming into hell before but there’s a first time for everything

@invisichad.bsky.social and I are designing our Patreon holiday card! If you would like one, please join our Patreon at patreon.com/trisarahtops! (lowest tier is $4/month)

Trisarahjtops is supporting Portland teachers in their strike (Portland teacher union = Portland Association of Teachers = PAT) drawn by @invisichad.bsky.social

This is what happens when I change my avi , so you can see my reluctance to alter things

I want something dramatic yet harmless to happen to me so I can opt out of all responsibilities

www.patreon.com/posts/ghost-... Spooky new patreon post!!! cc @invisichad.bsky.social

tiny eel king

cop: is this your chocolate factory? willy wonka: why do you ask? cop: we've received reports of maimed children and slave labor wonka: that 8 year old owns it now

Have you noticed that the more legal trouble trump is in, the less orange he becomes? This is due to the expansion and contraction of his chromatophores, which instinctively react to danger. One of nature’s most fascinating forms of camouflage

Autism exams are like “would you rather go to a theater or a museum?” and it’s like… would you like a fifty page essay that doesn’t answer your question or can I just tell you that the only way I can play Dark Souls is to imagine it as a turn-based strategy game?

It's not the most ethical move in the world, but in a pinch you can hand off a cursed object to basically any baby

Ugh, how embarrassing. The detective who suspects me of murder told me not to leave town and I said "you too" back.

you've heard of penis, now, get ready for... Penisn't

Men are from Mars, women are from a planet that probably smells nicer than Mars.

When someone accuses me of making up a word I severely chastigate them.

Crossing the WGA picket line to pitch my “You, Me, and Dupree” expanded universe to an executive trying to eat lunch, but here’s the hook: This time *I* play Dupree. Then I wow them with my amazing take on Dupree

Reading Charles Dickens kinda ruined other writers for me. Now when I read a story with a normal-sized Tim I can't help but feel like the author is doing too much.

Cop: I need to seeyour ID and registration Me: (still riding high from having beaten a FromSoft game) You dare ask this of ME? The ELDEN LORD?!

If u want to support mine and @invisichad.bsky.social 's Art & Ideas, please consider subscribing to our Patreon (lowest tier $4/month). Or u can go and look at lots of stuff there for free. U can also support by nodding quietly to yourself and thinking, "Wow, art is nice."

Oh sure, Willy Wonka is beloved, but ONE kid falls into molten steel at my foundry and my employees sing a little song about what a dick he was, and I'M the monster.

I’m the prettiest person who locked both their car keys and half of their skirt inside their car, in this carpark, this morning

Cheating on this book with another book but being blatant about it by using the other book as a bookmark

I made a painting!

It’s like my grandma always says, “I died 8 years ago. Please stop talking to me.”

Am I immature for my age or am I the progeny of a secret order of elvish ancestors, corrupted by the earth and forced to grow old long before I could ever develop my culture’s unbelievable levels of wisdom and intelligence

Many kinds of jellyfish are susceptible to fashion trends

Each of these siblings has such personality and I’m just gonna chop em up 😭

They just got back from the carnival

ok it was fun at first but i am officially bored of trump getting indicted. i think they should trap him in a computer like Tron

me: I need a passport so I can go to australia clerk: have you ever been convicted of a crime? me: is... is that still necessary

That was the doctor. I’m afraid…it’s about your vibes.

Doctor: Great job, you've been born. You're a natural. Now, press [A] repeatedly to cry. Right, just like that. As a baby, crying is one of your most useful abilities

Me living by the sword: Swords rule Me dying by the sword: Ugheueghhh

the new devastating burn is "Go back to the 90s and eat your Snackwells." The recipient will look like you smacked them and everyone in the room goes "oooooooooh"

More crowns for more eels

Running a neat experiment to see how quickly two inflamed bug bites positioned directly next to each other can make me literally insane

Once again I have woken up and my cats have failed to surprise me with freshly made coffee

God *up on a chair, shrieking*: GET IT GET IT GET IT!! Mrs God: You know they're more afraid of you than you are of them. *gently sweeps human outside*

How’s bout a social energy propeller cap. When the propeller is spinning I can make small talk. If it’s spinning fast I can entertain you. But if it’s not spinning don’t ask me questions like how have I been. The answer is bad

The eel needed a crown

Yes, by all means, autocorrect. Let’s tell the Chinese restaurant we’d like an order of Human chicken.

I got a deep tissue massage and now the only thing I can do without dying is lay in bed and watch cartoons. I have achieved the perfect state of being

I made a painting!