as performance art, this is infinitely better than anything you could generate with AI

A U.S. president cannot be held accountable. Therefore, a U.S. president must never make a policy decision.

this pot has killed 9 people im p sure (they all deserved it)

ive been watching this really cool, old isekai recently, the twist is it's british? and live action? yeah, it's called "life on mars"?

Many people are saying they are delighted to see me on screen talking pottery again, maybe it is time to give Rose her own tv show many are saying

Seeing my gf for the first time since before Christmas and she's been showing me the minecraft castle she built in that time - it's been 15 minutes and there's still more

Nicolás Maduro Charged With Felony Oil Possession

Thinking about when I played Secret Hitler with a friend whose strategy was to say "I'm Hitler" a lot regardless of evidence - we all ended up voting for him bc, well, there's no way he could actually be Hitler right? We unanimously voted in Hitler and lost the game

Spray paint a plane and they'll detain you without trial and call you a terrorist. Kidnap a foreign head of state - and Keir Starmer will make it clear we've played no part in it but will wait for the scheduled press conference in a few hours before potentially condemning it

BREAKING: PM Keir Starmer responds to U.S. acts of war in Venezuela

Happy New War

neither my mom nor i could sleep. i went up adn asked if she had seen the news. she hadnt. i told her. she jsut said "are you joking". i was not. she then said "are you fucking kidding me". i was not

I mean, ideally don't start unprompted wars of aggression at all but clearly that's asking too much

you know, I think 2026 is gonna be a great y- oh uhhh maybe 2027, actually

showed my family pluribus and my mum thought carol and helen were "just friends" AHHHHHHHHHH

gf called me "dilf bait" so now im looking into faking my own death, ama

8 year old sat in the corner, a cloth in their hand, a faraway look in their eye: "War? What do you know of war? You have not seen the treachery in the soul of man. You have not felt what it means to pull the trigger." They turn their head away from you and continue polishing their Nerf gun

Basically there was "proper time" where a year lasted a year, roughly 1978-1998; "grown-up time", the five years that were 1999-2012; 2016, which lasted from 2013 to March 8 2020; Lockdown, which was a year again; and then The Eternal Now of May 2021 onward, which lasted a second and a millennium.

They've replaced the free water fountain at Euston with a new one......... that charges you to use it

new scam going around where they hire you for a job but pay you less than the value your labor produced

chat is Charizard a bottom

Having to seriously reconsider my relationship after finding out my girlfriend hates Charizard

tried to do a Bluesky Wrapped and it said "you post too much" and told me to "log off"??

100% - nail on the head - and the far-right and others have admitted as much when they've spoken about "hereditarianism". This is why the likes of Steven Pinker keep being found swimming in far-right waters; because they think it's all down to genes

The story of moses is actually about being a good trade union leader

bbc archaeology documentary: ... and these beads, tools, and jewels from 3000 years ago show people had been coming here from as far as africa, settling to make a life in britain and adding to our culture. bbc news: MIGRANTS: IS BRITAIN TOO FULL? WE ASK TWO RACISTS AND A TRANSPHOBE.

A friend of mine - a longstanding highly rated and senior servant to the Labour Party - wrote to me some weeks back saying 'This is the worst Government of my life time.' He hadn't forgotten Liz Truss but he credited her, inept though she was, with, unlike Labour, at least knowing what she wanted.

YEAH, DEATH T- wait what was that last one?

*Doc Brown voice*: Marty! We need to cook!

Especially grim because this is a Labour government doing it, and there is no meaningful opposition. We have been deep in National Front Trumpy territory for many years now, no help is coming for a long, long time and what comes next will be much worse and uglier than this is.

Oh, this is sickening, cool

Hey Wes, I can save you the trouble. The reason a lot of people are struggling with their mental health in the UK is it fucking sucks here. Aside from usual late-stage capitalism stuff, everything that could be cool about living here has been systematically made worse by people like you, you cunt.

I'm gonna go ahead and assume every actor I know is already voting Yes on this, purely on the basis of "I enjoy the continuing existence of my profession"

Masks - not just useful for protecting your health

i don't get people who don't do bsky, how do you stop thinking "poridge is just oat soup" over and over?

Mel is encouraging me to post more again, is this toxic yuri?

y'know what? fuck you. *untucks your hair from behind your ear*

Felt like this when mortgage payments went up a few years ago - yes, it's horrible to now be paying an extra £200 a month, but that's been happening to renters year on year and there were no sadface articles on that, just "market forces" and "nobody has a right to live in a city"

ME POSTING: Good pussy sound like the Silent Hill radio ME AFTER I NOTICE A FAMOUS PERSON JUST FOLLOWED ME: More than ever it is so inportant to be apprised of all that is to be and furthermore to learn of all that could in the best manner we are able as this is the true delight of Life

had this explained to me before but i'm still really confused. so is wicked like a my immortal prequel or is it more of a soft reboot type thing

Grand opening, grand closing. X quietly disabled a new feature that showed which country an account was posting from when it revealed that lots of popular right wing MAGA accounts were being run from foreign countries like India and Nigeria.

more like the wicked witch of the woke am i right? fuck animals.

Had a dream ln that the new Simpsons opening showed a picture of all the voice actors for all the characters as they were introduced, but then it got insanely long Too Many Cooks style

the absolute fucking indignity of logging on to be silly and accidentally saying something insightful. serf, hand me the weed gummies, this status quo cannot be allowed to persist

if my alarm is being set for less than 7 hours, it shouldn't pop up with how long i have, like thanks now im stressed and will sleep less

I can tell I was tired last night bc when messaging my girlfriend goodnight, it took me 3 tries to get "tty tomoroew" at which point I gave up and left it

On my third glass of Limestone Slurry

my "chill drinks with friends at 7" plans have somehow transmuted into "east london pub crawl starting at 2"

"oh yeah, i met her hobby dogging and she gave me her handy" - Germans, apparently