jesus

the classic Onion piece theonion.com/study-iraqis...

The new book on shrubs from @dietsch.bsky.social arrived here yesterday, and literally the 1st recipe I looked at was for a blood orange shrub that had Old Bay in the recipe. With that as my most recent thought about Old Bay, the post below wasn't as shocking as it might otherwise have been.

Ok, this fucking rocks. Everyone should be able to use the bathroom when they're out and about.

really proud to live in Los Angeles right now fuck these assholes, this city is great

one of the bravest people of this century so far. RIP. hope you find peace somewhere.

I’m not sure I love my kids as much as this guy loves Vlad

Hey hey @johnacecil.bsky.social tries this? It’s fucking lit, man. 🍹

Even Captain Marvel Junior knows the remit.

My word, the Fuck Your Feelings crowd sure is emo.

Date yourself with toys that were newly available when you played with them.

Superboy and the Legion of Super-Heroes

@travisjohnson.bsky.social hey look at this guy. Upside-down-land www.threads.net/@pastortravi...

1619

If you really want to hear about it, the first thing you’ll probably want to know is where I was born, and what my lousy childhood was like, and how my parents were occupied and all before they had me, and all that Mrs. Dalloway kind of crap

56M. Tacky AF.

Remember the 90s when everybody only hurt sometimes.

Me in the national security group chat

ffs

It’s funny being an old bartender, hearing the Secretary of Defense speak on the tarmac and instinctively thinking “He’s two drinks in, don’t give him the third.”

Cooking mushrooms and onions right now for a soup and it’s really all the aromatherapy I need.

The main difference between Musk and Hitler is that the volkswagen was a reliable, reasonably priced vehicle.

Sunday morning ritual with @jasonmcgrath.bsky.social: part cat, part man.

First, Charlie Kirk's bestie is not the future of the Democratic Party. Second, to hell with this asshole.

"The first guest on Gavin Newsom's podcast was Charlie Kirk" is more than enough for me to say "absolutely not" to any suggestion Newsom play any role in the future of the Democratic Party. People like him are the past, the failures, the ones who got us here.

There’s so much! Maybe these?

This is even more embarrassing than the time this spineless motherfucker made tuna melts.

'Did you even say thank you?'

Not just deserve. Weather monitoring, disease management, and food safety are services we pay for from the government that are being stolen from us.

I'm still fiddling with the newsletter--content, format, style, frequency, all the things. But I published a new one yesterday; please check it out. buttondown.com/michaeldiets...

Democratic Leaders Stand Real Still In Hopes No One Notices Them

Connolly was my rep until we moved to Baltimore, and he while he *was* great for his district, he’s not the man for this moment, ESPECIALLY since he reps so many feds. This is a terrible message from someone not just in this specific leadership role, but from someone who reps Northern Virginia.

Freezer martini with sherry in lieu of vermouth, and another read through of LOTR. It’s a hellzapoppin Saturday here.

Democrats are fundamentally misunderstanding the moment: We're not asking them to be *legislators* right now. We need them to be *politicians.* There's nothing to be done about the legislative situation. They're right about that. But there's PLENTY to be done as politicians.

“Everyone around me is a mere doll, but I, Eric Lipton, am an action figure!”

I appreciate everyone’s messages of support, I’m trying to get through all my mentions but as you can imagine, it’s been a bit of a busy day :) Remember - peaceful civil disobedience, and no kings, no tyrants. Not ever.

CW: unimaginable horror related to suicide and deportation Truly unbearable: an 11 year old took her life after being bullied by classmates threatening to call ICE on her family. www.independent.co.uk/news/world/a...

Is Patron Pete Hegseth the only cabinet member with a drinking problem?

doesn't Marry Me Salmon imply the existence of Fuck Me Salmon and Kill Me Salmon?

Today is the birthday of writer Bill Finger (Feb. 8, 1914-Jan. 18, 1974), who took Bob Kane’s initial idea & developed it into the Batman we know today. He also wrote the first appearance of the original Green Lantern, and cocreated Robin, the Joker, Catwoman, Lana Lang, Wildcat, Riddler, & more.

here's another brilliant idea you can have free of charge: a perfect dog name is Hasenpfeffer Incorporated

Elon Musk is a terrible president.

Well, this was the most harrowing fucking thing I've ever had to work on, and I'm just the damn lawyer. Can't imagine the client living it, and it's a goddamn privilege to represent her. DO NOT READ THIS unless you can handle details of some truly vile sexual abuse by Neil Gaiman.

Senate Dems need new leadership

Oxford Companion to Spirits & Cocktails pg 698 contr @dietsch.bsky.social sugar sweet, soluble carbohydrate, produced in plants naturally during the process of photosynthesis. The ethanol in beverage alcohol is formed when yeast consumes the natural sugars found in raw materials #Cheers

DEI is when a woman or non-white person who is qualified for a job receives that job. The meritocracy is when a 19 year old gets to run the United States government because he posted the dankest memes

And they went and canceled Sandman. Good.

lol, the right expected progressives to defend him so they could write articles accusing us of double standards and rant about how we're all rape apologists. instead we just dropped that mf'er like the monster he so obviously is.