They will use SPLC to lump every problem ever into it, the same way they kept bleating about the "laptop from hell" even though it had nothing to do with whatever they were blaming. And most people didn't know enough about it to understand the difference.

Reality show champions should have the option of defending their title in the following season. Like it's Jeopardy.

I really think that we should start thinking about holding election results until they are all counted, rather than releasing them minute by minute. the gop was not "winning"; it's not a horse race. the election is over. you're just counting ballots. 1

Yes, the fact that I'm attending the White House Correspondents Dinner might SEEM like a supine gesture of complete deference to the insane dullard who demands total obedience from the press, BUT that's until you see the secret message I have on my pocket square

Seems like the Strait of Hormuz is only open when the stock market is.

post the best picture you have ever taken of your pet (if you feel like it):

Yeah, I know the feeling.

The mothership will struggle to match this one tonight.

People should be LIVID about this. Our elected representatives should raise holy hell that this is happening. Potentially the biggest thing in the fight against cancer, maybe ever, and Kooky McGravelvoice unilaterally pulls the plug?

This makes me unbelievably angry. We were so close to prevention and cures for so many things. Case in point: Individualized cancer treatments that reduced deaths & recurrence by half! mRNA cancer vaccines were doing well in trials to teach immune systems to recognize & attack cancer cells.

Welcome home, Artemis crew!

EXCLUSIVE: At least three people have lodged discrimination complaints against Labor Secretary Lori Chavez-DeRemer, alleging she sought to retaliate against women who reported her husband for sexual misconduct, sources say. Read more from Carol Leonnig and Mychael Schnell:

was that Melania speech one of Iran’s demands

Either some story was about to drop, or we may have to rename the Streisand Effect

Sure miss the days where a madman's social media posts didn't drive the global conversation EVERY SINGLE MORNING.

Surprised he hasn't tariffed the world for using "American Moonlight."

As a child of the 80s (Well, late '79 to be precise), I just find it kinda hilarious that Eddie, The Fuck You Man, turned out to be the congenial wholesome family man we thought Cosby was back then... #FilthFlarnFilth

1. Golden-Age Simpsons 2. Bojack Horseman 3. Archer 4. The Jetsons 5. PB&J Otter (fun memories of watching with my kids)

Gotta admit that I didn't expect the first U.S. president to say the words "Praise be to Allah" to be Donald Trump,

I remember being able to wake up on Easter morning and not having to think about the President of the United States' mental state

That's been his tell for years

"Sir"

Hard to believe we're launching human beings toward the moon in less than an hour and it probably won't even make tomorrow's front pages.

Patient: Did you remove all the tumor? Improv Surgeon: Yes, and

Excited for Trump’s No Kings video tonight where he drives a tanker full of diarrhea through the Strait of Hormuz and unloads it all over the American People

I don’t want to rate / review everything I do or eat or purchase or experience. Such a bizarre way to go through life.

Wow, it was nice to see a big movie with a full auditorium tonight. Last movie I remember seeing with nearly every seat in a big theater filled was Barbie.

Preordering Midnight Mass the second there's a physical copy to buy.

Orange Julius Caesar

Big iced tea matchup on Friday

If Venezuela pulls this off, will Machado also give him the WBC trophy?

If there was a real DTF St. Louis app, it would just ask users where they went to high school.

“I nominated someone who I always thought was weak on security as Director of the United States National Counterterrorism Center.”

question: is it bad to try to increase dependence on nonrenewable energy when you're in a war in oil country

"Open the Strait of Hormuz. You may not receive the help of any other sovereign nation. Fastest wins."

This won't be his last.

The Disney pimpage on this Red Carpet Show is wild.

~ 1,560 scaramuccis

I keep seeing people ask about the 25th Amendment. Guys. His entire Cabinet is walking around in shoes that don’t fit because they’re scared to take them off. The 25th is never happening.

The first ever winner of the “FIFA Peace Prize” is also likely be the first head of state to host a World Cup while bombing one of the participating countries.

Like it's a Wim Wenders movie at a Cannes premiere.

leland palmer in the black lodge

Blue Jay: My scientific name is Cyanocitta cristata American Robin: Oh that's beautiful, I don't know mine, not sure if I have one

Either these fortune cookies are old, or it's gonna be a rough year.

I will never get over how the result of going through a global pandemic that killed over 7 million people, including 1.2 million Americans—and where we swiftly created an effective vaccine for it—was massive growth in anti-vax sentiment, the rise of RFK Jr., and the return of fucking measles.

Wal-Marty Supreme

The new nominee can present Trump the MarkWayne Prize for American Humor

Will fit in well with the cabinet