We sally forth from the Great Beyond!

Understandably, the final straw was Jelly Roll's pivot to country

UK should ban me from social media

So I reckon I’m Bluesky’s first Stanley Cup Champion? #SoundTheSiren

jesus christ NO! NO!!! FUCK

Y'all are missing the point. Those are the ingredients necessary to make a *single* Flamin' Hot Cheeto.

The Rich: Bread and Circuses will keep them happy, right? But of course the Bread won't be free. What are we, a charity? They can just take out a loan if they need the Bread that badly. And what if we crater the Circuses for a tax write-off....

[angry goose meme] Child killed by who, motherfucker ??

Okay if you’re a teen impersonating a 38-year-old on this website here’s a list of Simpsons references you need to know:

This is awful - did you "create" it using AI? It's so bad I'm checking out each "author," because it's hard to believe anyone would willingly put their name to it. It's genuinely shameful.

A block to aspire to

Giving people the ability to go back and alter what they've already committed to the timeline would fundamentally break the site on a conceptual level

🎶I hurt myself today to see if I still feel🎶

Legally and morally, ignoring cookie dough risk falls into a different category than the raw milk and antivaxxers do bc eating cookie dough is wholesome.

“Because I’m an adult & I’ll probably survive salmonella” -admittedly not my best excuse for why I can eat cookie dough but the kids can’t

Doctor Who is the med school baseball team's first baseman

cracking open a cold one with the boys

CUTE, BUT BLURRY A Life In Retrospect a one-woman slideshow

Sometimes the best response to finding the days main character is just to mute and enjoy the quiet

“if you died nothing in my life would change”: a twitter exchange about a pizza “face god and walk backwards into hell”: a dril tweet about hollering at zoo animals “you cannot kill me in a way that matters”: a tumblr shitpost about mushrooms

You're not a true New Yorker unless your ancestors paid fealty to King James II prior to his ascension 1685, when he was merely the Duke of York

All my money to the first person who turns my car into a faraday cage. Well all my money except for my new physical media budget

Preemptive post:

Every few years Vince Staples just casually drops one of the best albums of the year and I think that's really special.

Your mom wants to know if you'll pick up some Gas-X for her

It turns out all you need are some of the best players in the history of the game to go 82-0. Who knew?

I can't get over how Kenny's logic is "people like that he sexted other women because it proves he's not a Washington insider" and also "people don't mind this scandal because everyone in Washington is doing it." They can't both be true!

"I'm so disappointed in everyone sharing an artist's work to commemorate her impact and importance" lol lmao even

David Brooks to retire, see what "not being wrong for once" is like

Happy Pride! Follow this account, and repost this to enter a draw to win this wallet! Open worldwide, I'll ship it anywhere. I'll pick a winner at random on Saturday night, June 13, 2026 This wallet is 100% handmade with premium veg tan leather 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️ Love and respect to the 2SLGBTQI+ community!

I am obsessed with this finalist in this year's Michigan “I voted” sticker design contest

ok, this place has the juice

Due to forseen circumstances within my control I will be late

Ah yes, the "Thdpsssps"

PETA Billboard Falsely Assumes Man Wouldn’t Eat His Cat https://theonion.com/peta-billboard-falsely-assumes-man-wouldnt-eat-his-cat/

Hello voters, I-*briefcase full of scandals falls open*

Sometimes you see a post on this account that's worth searching the original, so you can block too and never see something like this again

A bird in the hand is currently worth an average of 3.75 birds in the bush, given the rising costs of meat worldwide

*Werner Herzog voice*

Not all who wander are lost, but I sure am

MIT boasts a $27b endowment

Sweet tea tastes like an undiagnosed diabetic's urine

Ok this is a truly great tweet

dipshit blue check journalist: I get better engagement on Twitter. Bluesky is dying me: no *long pull on a bottle of whiskey* no, but it probably should

Circumcision Tylenol