One of my favorite fun facts is why the TMNT are named after artists (it’s because the type of turtle they are is a “painted turtle”). I told my nephew about this and he immediately replied that there should be a Bob Ross turtle. So rather than explain the renaissance movement to him, I-

“Get ready, stay ready” a slogan surprisingly shared by Rapture Christians and fiber supplements targeted at gay men on Instagram.

Listening to this again after a mildly stressful afternoon and I'm not sure it has a bad track?

You know, having read Planetary, I’m just not sure a crewed lunar mission called “Artemis” is exactly what we need right now www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...

Them: We need to add jira stories for the integration Me, quietly to myself: "integration" is an anagram of "taint region"

I love the fact that the reaction of primary-school-aged Glasgow weans, faced with the news that there was a terrifying bogle haunting the cemetery, was "let's tool up and go completely Buffy on him".

Couldn’t understand why our local undertaker have an eel-shaped coffin in their window, but now I realise it acts as a memento moray.

It occurs to me, spurred by that last repost, that if we are as a nation in the business of proscribing folks we consider a serious threat to our democracy or way of life, “Laura Kuenssberg” might have been a better and more easily addressed bet than “Palestine Action”.

It is possible to cherish the BBC as an institution while also saying that BBC News is failing very badly, day after day, in its duty to inform and that it always fails in a right-wing direction. It desperately needs to recover its integrity

So help me I am British and forty two years old. Is this going to be what makes me look up what the fuck Tylenol actually is? It’s going to be either the most tedious weaksauce pharmacy bullshit, or basically heroin but they sell it at Burger King, and nothing in between, isn’t it.

Mika's The Origin of Love is a grossly underrated album.

BBC push alert tomorrow: ‘The Rapture is here. Why this could be good news for Reform UK’

We should not care or reward Disney for this. We must make their bottom line hurt for even considering doing something like this. Don't let up. Other companies need to see that bowing to fascism is not something you can do without consequence.

Tried that cute weird captcha game everyone was talking about, but bailed on the level that was blatantly homophobic (requires you to park a car)

I bit my dentist today. Wasn't even getting a checkup at the time, I just saw him at the supermarket

Staying in Glasgow for a few days, away from my normal coffee setup and using a V60. Turns out two ~300ml V60 brews contains a smidge more caffeine than my usual two ~35ml espressos. Anyway, I can smell geometry now.

Why are you covered in jam? I pumped it up. You… Pumped it up. *opening mouth Bike pump. *we both continue to eat our toast in silence.

I’m no expert but maybe if the media didn’t report on every one of Nigel Farage’s racist brainfarts like it was an inevitability rather than something he would have to win a general election in four years time to even start doing, he’d be less likely to win any kind of election at all.

Well. I have now been to a PureGym. I have to say, I remain mystified as to quite why the good gentlemen of Grindr are so enamoured of them as a rendezvous. It seems to occupy a liminal spot somewhere between actually comfortable and sleazily industrial.

I don't know which is more disturbing. Finding out that the catchy ditty Watermelon Sugar by Harry Styles is about cunnilingus or having my mother in law explain this to me via the medium of Charades

Has anyone done cloying lounge jazz punk covers under the moniker Sid Viscous, or do I have to learn to sing?

This was good! peccadillo.film/pages/films/... Although the description makes it sound more like camp drama and less like an emotional pressure cooker than I went in equipped for.

Err...

Oh. Apparently Ian McEwan has written his novel again? (Although I stopped at On Chesil Beach, so maybe I'm being unfair)

Saw a LinkedIn post saying the US visa changes were Good, Actually because they'd make businesses think more carefully about whether they needed to hire, and honey, I can see how you built that with the bits, but it is entirely not the picture on the box.

Today we are apparently going to Edinburgh to see a French Canadian movie about drag queens. Sometimes I take a look at my life from a cognitive step or two back, and wonder - in the most delicious way - how the fuck I would explain it to my teenage self.

Maybe - just a crazy idea, but bear with me for a moment! - the reason why the Lib Dems should not “get serious“ is that the UK’s most important media organisation covers politics in babytalk so much of the time?

(I think a lot of the BBC’s written output can likely be explained by them interpreting “need to write for a reading age of seven” as ”need to write for a moron with an adult reading age”.)

100%, because - like the old "cheese or font?" one - this sits at a cursèd intersection of my brain problems.

I used to work a place that had a wearhouse with lights that worked off of movement sensors. To be clear. You couldn't turn the lights on or off. They came on when they sensed movement and went off when movement stopped...

How about we make everything so woke that the gammonati all physically explode in a cloud of apoplectic mush? Drag Artists read the news. Weather forecasts all in Hindi. Replace the stripes on mint humbugs with rainbows. All pubs serve lager in sherry glasses.

Refrigerators aren’t appliances, they’re tombs where lettuce goes to rot and condiments achieve immortality.

I remain convinced that the pretzel bun is the god tier burger bun. (Jalapeño popper burger, Bread Meats Bread, Glasgow)

Ok so the first hundred or so pages are an arch delight.

(guy who has only read two books) this orwellian shit is starting to seem pretty dickensian to me

Use a flawed system often enough and you will develop an odd, barely rational either loathing of or affection for its quirks. Anyway, I’m back at the least worst bar at Stansted Airport.

"AI can replace 95 per cent of university tuition with superior one-on-one tutoring, bespoke, in your own home, 24/7" Increasingly obvious that the only question the Telegraph asks its contributors is 'Can you promise us you know absolutely nothing about the subject you're writing about?'

How have I never seen this before? It is *amazing*.

Worrying development: I’m contemplating Subway for lunch but I’m not hungover.

Finished this last night and would thoroughly recommend it despite a slight cohesion wobble in the second half. A magical school caper brought up to current building regs. Funny and intricate and angry about the intersections of education, class, and injustice.

Blue iguana climbs back from the brink. Grand Cayman’s blue iguana, once down to fewer than 25 individuals, now numbers more than 1,000 in the wild. Captive breeding, habitat restoration and community engagement reversed what was nearly a Caribbean extinction. CNN buff.ly/GKiJpcz #ShareGoodNewsToo

Apparently ChatGPT also thought “Soda Pop” was a banger and decided to take credit for the lyrics?

in Disney’s next Marvel film the hero won’t criticise the villain or even stand up to them

Just saw Mario turned 40 this week and so, once again, I present to you: the first level of Super Mario but all the sound effects are farts.

I legit sometimes wonder if this is how the centrists won. Well, that and the actually organised left being busy with community work.

Folks, I’ve said it before and I’m not going to stop: this is a stone cold banger www.deliciousmagazine.co.uk/recipes/cavo... You can even switch out the crispy breadcrumbs for fried pancetta cubes if yo nasty.

Update: that was fucking exhausting. And probably fun? I think?