So glad the only bus to the airport got me in an hour before checkin opened and the flight is boarding two hours after it was due to take off 😣

Great, now I’m crying on a National Express bus to Luton. What on earth has my life become.

❄️ Our cool spaces are open across the city. Drop by and stay as long as you need during opening hours. Get access to: ✅ Drinking water ✅ Toilets ✅ Wi-Fi ✅ A cool, shaded space 🔗 More: https://orlo.uk/e92u9

Can highly recommend a Calippo lolly between the boobs, and remembering not to switch your camera on in meetings.

The second season of Beef feels exactly half way between the first season of Beef and The White Lotus

I declare that today, and for the next three days, all coffee shall be iced. Make it so.

This travel malarkey comes with a LOT of admin. I swear I have a second full time job just getting visas, flights, currency and writing kit lists 🙈🙈 #firstworldproblems

Just did a climbing session 24hours after giving blood. That was hard! Breathless the whole time, occasional dizzy spells. I climbed pretty well considering, but I was genuinely surprised how tough it was!

To the spider living in my wing mirror, I’ve let you stay, I could have blasted you out with water but I didn’t. For the love of god please stop covering my mirror in webs.

I've had an absolutely horrendous 18 months, would not wish it on anyone, however that has meant I qualify for a career break with my job held for me to go back to after 6 months. So, big travels coming up, and there's probably a conference talk in this somewhere too 😅

There's some epic thunder and hailstorms rolling through Cambridge today, which make my announcement to my team that I'm taking 6 months off work feel even more epic.

Just submitted a request for 6 months off work, wish me luck everyone, I super need this reset.

I'll tell you what, a breakup from a long term partnership is phenomenal writing fodder. I've basically got a whole book of poetry now. Writing really is my therapy. Also I am sad and crying, again.

Absolute spoilsports at the Royal Mint designing the new notes

I'm sorry I can't work today, my cat got trapped in a shed for two days and now the clingy idiot won't stop being on me and everything I touch singing the song of his people.

Bravo Guardian for using this picture of Trump, sterling work

Can't decide if I'm dehydrated or my pony tail is too tight #IYKYK

Put that in a conical Yorkshire pud and I'd be all over it.

It's really great how Mac magic mice and keyboards give you a battery warning so you can charge before they just, you know, die..... 🙄😒

You know what, I wasn't going to say that, but now I'm going to say that

Just did the ironing while watching the Louis Theroux manosphere documentary. I guess that’s irony.

This should not be allowed to happen, it is so so bad for the planet - are they suggesting they'd really not sell these seats to someone willing to pay full price and actually travel?

No, sir, you are becoming an axolotl

Time for this ole guy again. Cycling to work today was *challenging*

Well put!

Cats are currently obsessed with trying to get in to the cupboard. I dutifully open said cupboard and allow an unholy amount of sniffing to commence. Curiosity sated, cats calmed. 5 mins later the bastards are trying to get in to the cupboard again.

For those of you just tuning in, the #ITAvENG match is actually the same sport as the #SCOvFRA one. I know you wouldn't think it to look at them, but trust me... #M6N

Why is it that we’re winning but we look like we’re losing? #ITAvENG #sixnations

Extremely disappointing soup

[Lindisfarne] Me: (chanting) teeth, teeth- Other fossil hunters: teeth, TEETH British Geological Society: [pounding its clipboard] TEETH, TEETH, TEETH!

How much time and effort is wasted switching from company from another because they hike their prices after a while? What happened to rewarding customer loyalty? Why does every purchase now entail the work of having to rate the person delivering it? It’s exhausting!!

Sushi supervisor

omg everybody go draw a horse this is what the internet was made for gradient.horse

Friend: I watch a lot of YouTube but I just wish you could lose the shorts. Me: I watch a lot of rugby mate, and same.

Absolutely livid that ITV will be playing ads during the six nations matches. We really have decended in to an all money and no service world.

I've had the flu, and am now left with the cough and raw chest. Time to practice all the songs that benefit from a husky voice. I sound sexxxy / very ill.

Don’t threaten me with a good time

I feel like there's been a new bin for each decade of my life and I genuinely can't wait to see what they come up with for my 50s and 60s.

New little grey food waste bin just droppped in my neighbourhood where we *checks notes* have a massive green bin that accepts food waste. Excited to see all the self-built bin store neighbours go mental at the new format not fitting in their perfect wooden tidyness shrines.

Lollll struggling to sell that ticket are we?

Latest iOS update makes me feel like my eyes are going funny. The opposing corner highlights on square icons make them all feel like they're moving or sliding down off the screen. Very do not like.

Everybody thinks 'https://' stands for 'hypertext transfer protocol secure' but it actually stands for 'head to this place, sucka' followed by a colon and two laser sounds

Love it when a visa application requires all countries visited in the last 10 years but it has to be fewer than 20 :/

Colleague asked if he could ask a stupid question, so I replied only if it's more stupid than 'once I breathe in, do I breathe out or is it in again?' and he said 'that's not a stupid question' and now I'm scared.

All the averts for AI assistants on your phone make it out like a know-it-all friend, and having been that guy forever I can tell you; this is not what people want at all 😅

How many times it is acceptable to go out for a coffee during a single work day? And is it more acceptable if I badge it as 'supporting local businesses'?

Can't believe the RSPB ran out of birds after just the first 16.

The cats seem very confused about why I’m cleaning my Christmas cards.

Today's the first time in quite a few weeks I woke up and didn't think about my mental state. I just got up and got on with my day, feeling worn out but ok. I've been struggling lately, and only now realise how exhausting it is for all of your thoughts to be consumed by how you feel. #mentalhealth

Cambridge may be a tiny city, but I always wish it were smaller during the winter fair